Adoption Day

Today, it became official. Robin is now legally a part of our family. We are incredibly happy. We simply can't imagine life without her. She did, after all, join our family in body and spirit a year ago last April. As a part of today's celebration, we've decided to change our blog from "Henry's House" to "Henry and Robin's House."

http://henryandrobins-house.blogspot.com

CPS, ENT, and Out of Town Visitors

Thursday we had a double whammy visit from Baby A's CPS case worker and our foster agency specialist. It was actually nice to get to kill two birds with one stone and we hope to do it again next month. The cps worker was new to the case and seems much more on top of things than the last one. She actually recognized Miss R and was impressed with how much she had grown and how outgoing she was. The visit went well.

On Friday I took the day off so I could take Henry to his ear checkup and do some last minute things around the house before Grandma Gwen and Aunt Jennifer arrived. It was a very nice morning. The ENT office has a play room in the waiting room and Henry remembered this and seemed excited to go there so he actually behaved himself. When I dropped off Baby A both he and Miss R were very good about staying off the carpet which they usually are not. There is a no shoes on the carpet policy because the babies are crawling around on it all day.

Henry's ears checked out with flying colors which was nice. He remembered that they use Winnie the Pooh and Tigger in their sound proof room as a reward for the kids when they get it right. He repeated many times, "I want Winnie the Pooh and Tigger too!"

After the ENT I took him to see Poppy. Henry had a dream and woke up distressed and only wanted to see Poppy. Since I was going to be in the neighborhood, Kate suggested we visit Poppy so Henry could see he was ok.

He was then dropped off at school where he had no problems saying goodbye to me. He walked to a table and sat down and started playing without so much as a second look. He really seems to be doing well in the new class. I think one part of that is there are so many more things to do. They have computers, they go to different rooms in the daycare to do different activities and he gets to play on the big kids playground. I think he might also like being the young one in with older kids because he likes it when they help him with things like the computer, which he doesn't know how to use yet.

In the afternoon my mother, sister and two nephews came to visit. After picking them up at the airport we went to daycare and picked up the kids. We had a rather large group there but it worked out just fine and it was fun to show them around the place because it is a very nice facility.

We then came to our place and had some pizza and hung out. It was a nice evening. Henry took to Wyatt almost immediately. They played and played. At one point some of us including Wyatt went for a walk and Henry stayed home. He ran around the house calling for Wyatt and eventually convinced Kate to take him out on a walk so he could find cousin Wyatt.

Saturday everyone except Kate and Baby A went to the movies. We saw Dispicable Me which was pretty good. Henry sat between grandma Gwen and cousin Wyatt and hardly said a word the whole time. Miss R sat on my lap and we sat near cousin Charlie. Then we took the toddlers down to the play area for a little while.

I took the toddlers home to take a nap. Henry of course slept 15 minutes in the car and woke up as soon as he was put in his bed. I really wanted them to nap because we were going to the Desert Museum and it was going to be a late night.

In the evening we met up again and went to dinner at El Charro. Out of coincidence we ran into Kate's parents who were having dinner with some of Hank's high school friends. The kids were moderately well behaved. Miss R enjoyed her rice. Henry saw cousin Wyatt having churros for dinner and abandoned his dinner in favor of those.

We went to the Desert Museum. I think Wyatt and Charlie enjoyed looking for scorpions on the various rock walls with a black light. We made the mistake of trying to take Henry, Miss R and Baby A to an indoor bird show. First Baby A decided to scream at the top of her lungs inconsolably. I had left the bag with the milk out of the auditorium on the stroller. Kate took her out of the auditorium. I then began the task of trying to keep Henry in check. He was loud and wanted to stand up on the seat, lay down on the floor, and do everything he wasn't supposed to do. During the show birds flew around the auditorium so it was important that no one stood up or raised their hands. An inexperienced road runner decided he did not want to go back in his cage and spent an extended period of time running around the auditorium. He even flew into the middle of the audience and sat on the back of seats. He must have run around for at least 20 minutes during which time Henry was being a complete pain and Miss R was starting to be an accomplice. I couldn't take them out until the bird left the stage. Finally the bird was nabbed by the staff and I nabbed our two little do-do birds and left to join Kate with Baby A. I'll try to remember not to do that again.

When I left the auditorium I was glad to witness another ill behaved child, wouldn't want to think mine was the only one. She was probably 5 or 6 and was sitting by herself bemoaning her horrible day and how she wished she had never come and oh, wasn't it just horrible. Very dramatic but totally over acted. I was a little disheartened to think that getting older doesn't mean they behave better.

We missed a lot of the exhibits at the museum because we arrived late and the bird show took a while. We did get to see the mountain lions who are much more active at night. The bear was not cooperative but the wolves were fairly active as were the burrowing owls. We were relieved to have some drops of rain to cool us off while not getting us totally soaking wet. There was a good lightning storm to the north which was fun to watch.

This morning the kids slept until about 8am which is pretty late for them. We had waffles and spent the morning and afternoon at home. We decided to give our visitors a break after a rather full day on Saturday. I was fortunate that all 3 kids took a nap at once. I wanted to watch the British Open but it was a blowout so I napped on the couch while Kate ran errands.

In the evening we went to Kate's parents house for dinner. We swam in the pool for some time. Miss R didn't seem to want to get out. Henry had to get out a bit early since he was cold. Charlie and Wyatt stayed in for a very long time.

We had a wonderful dinner with Erin and Brian and Aunt Gloria in addition to my visiting family. Henry was a pain again and ended up in timeout and didn't really eat much dinner or desert. Miss R looked beautiful in a dress Kate bought for her. She received wonderful presents from everyone and seemed to really enjoy them despite looking like she was about to fall asleep.
















Tomorrow is the big day when we adopt Miss R so we should have lots to blog about then.

Never A Dull Moment

On Thursday morning, Jeff got the kids ready for school. I pretty much stayed up all night working on a website appendix for the book. Most of the material is up. I have three appendices left for three chapters. One chapter has resulted in 27 pages of backup material. It's exhausting. I did, however, drive the kids to school and they were fine. When Henry arrived at his class, he seemed happy to be there. Miss Lola said that most of the class will be moving up to the 4 year old room in August. Miss R seemed better than usual about her class. It helps when it is snack time. And Baby A was great as usual.

Jeff took Baby A to her 4-month check-up in the afternoon. She was 12 lbs 8 ozs and supposedly 25 inches. We're always dubious about height measurements as kids squirm and it just hard to get a baby to extend out and hold their heads still enough to get a good read. Dr. Bianchi and Jeff talked about the reflux. He said that we could see a GI if we wanted or he could just continue to monitor it. As she's growing, Jeff's inclined toward the later. I suspect that we'll hold off and see where things go with the OT's advice.

When Jeff picked up The Twins, Henry didn't want to come home. His class was just about to go to "The Village," a room that is set up like a village with store fronts and costumes. It is used for the potty-trained kids and quite a treat. I'm guessing that we'll have to make sure we don't pick the kids up before 4:30PM tomorrow so that Henry gets his "village" time. Before picking up Henry, Jeff had the opportunity to watch him through the window. They were doing some activity at the table. It involved making faces and Henry looked happy.

At 5:30PM, we had visits from our family specialist, Alison, and from Baby A's new case worker Christy, not to be confused with Miss R's case worker Christy. This was our first opportunity to get to know her, and she seems great. She worked at the Blake Foundation for a couple years before moving over to CPS. Her undergraduate degree was in family studies at the UA. So it appears that this field is a vocation for her, not just a job. As soon as she pulled up, Miss R met her at the door. As it turns out, she knows Miss R from having helped out on occasion with CPS visits at the start of Miss R's case last year. She said that she was excited to find out what happened to Miss R and was pleased that we are adopting her Monday. She was surprised at how much Miss R talks b/c she hadn't heard her speak so much before.

Although she hasn't worked on Baby A's case before, she has helped out on occasion and was familiar with the situation. She seemed quite knowledgeable. She was happy that we pursued getting an OT in place. If anything, she'd like to see more OT visits. Can't really say more, but I'll end by saying that like Baby A's lawyer, I suspect that Christy will sincerely try to make the best decisions for her. As we were told by others, the one stumbling block in this case is the judge, who seems to be treating this case differently from standard protocols (for reasons I can't explain here). We'll just have to wait and see. When Christy left, Alison said, "Wow. That's the best case worker I've ever seen. She's on top of things."

That brings us to our Henry and Miss R highlights during the visit. Miss R was as cute as a button. She and Henry did their synchronized "To Infinity and Beyond!" jumps off the ledge near the TV. Miss R was decked out in her Princess Ariel outfit, having gotten her shirt wet after school when we washed her hair.

Henry was in typical Henry form. At one point, Henry (who always claims he "can't do it" when we ask him to take his shirt off) decided to strip down to his Toy Story underwear b/c he wanted to go to the beach. Alison said, "There's never a null moment in this household!" He put his shoes on to help Alison check out the house. Guess he was going for the casual Thursday look. Alison said that her home visits with us were her favorites as the kids always manage to do something interesting. Our home "makes her heart happy" which was a nice thing to hear. When we said goodbye to Alison, Henry tried to get into her trunk and said "Woody!" Apparently, he was trying to enact the Toy Story scene where Buzz tries to get into the car trunk to save Woody.

We had dinner. Miss R ate tons of pinto beans. Henry didn't eat much. Last week, he loved tacquitos. This week, he didn't want them. Sigh.

I don't remember much beyond dinner as Baby A was hungry so I fed her. Then, she and I fell asleep on my bed. I just got up to get some work done at 3AM in the morning.

It was a busy day. A complete day. And for the moment anyway, things seem on course.

Bruises and Bling

Sometimes it can be difficult to remember what happened only yesterday. I believe we had a visit from Baby A's developmental coordinator in the morning. I can't really discuss that.

The kids did well at daycare. Henry had an incident report because he threw a fit when another child had a book he wanted and threw himself on the floor and fell into a book case. There was a bruise but it was actually something that he had already. He always has a bruise or two. Right now he has one on each shin and the one on his back.

Grammy and Poppy picked up the kids from daycare. They went to the mall because Grammy had her eye on a pair of shoes for Miss R. They have been termed the "blingy" shoes. They have sparkly toes and bright lights and are a shiny pink color with peace symbols on them. They stand out just a bit. At school today the teacher said Miss R spent more time in the bathroom because they keep the light off in there. The lights scared some of the other children because they thought the police were coming.

Henry didn't want shoes because none had Buzz Lightyear on them. Maybe we've indulged his Toy Story obsession a bit too much. I decided today he would wear a non Buzz Lightyear shirt which he did without too much protest. He did get to wear Buzz underwear and socks. I'm a real iron fist as you can tell.

After returning from Grammy and Poppy's last night the twins spent a good deal of time jumping off the ledge in front of the TV and yelling "To infinity and beyond!!!" We encouraged the activity in hopes they would wear themselves out. Then Henry decided jumping wasn't dangerous enough so he started jumping over things. He even jumped over Roger when he was standing between the couch and the bench near the couch. No wonder he always has bruises.

Today was unremarkable at school, at least as far as I know. When I pick them up I ask how they did and never get much info in response. Kate is always disappointed in how little info I get from the teachers.

The twins had swim lessons. Miss R had a screaming fit and didn't want to get in the pool. Fortunately she is the only one in her class and the instructor was able to get her calmed down relatively quickly. She did very well with kicking and bubble blowing and submersion. She did better climbing along the wall and getting out but still needs work there.

Henry didn't get into too much trouble in his class. The other little boy was much better behaved this time. He and Henry seemed to have fun together pinching each other. He is doing very well except for the back floats but he is getting better.

After swim lessons we went to Swenson's with Grammy and Poppy. Baby A slept most of the time. Henry was well behaved by his standards. Miss R is usually well behaved and was again this time. They both ate pretty well, almost finishing all their food which is rare. Maybe swim lessons work up an appetite.

Bedtime was a bit of a challenge. Miss R refused her nightgown and then when I took it away she wanted it. I've mentioned before how she has a habit of doing that and we want to discourage it. So I didn't let her have it and she cried and cried and cried. When trying to get her into another pair of pajama's she refused the top and refused to go to bed so she ended up in time out briefly. I think she was pretty tired. Before dinner she looked like she might fall asleep.

Henry decided he wanted to play with a toy and make a bunch of noise while I read a story. I told him I wouldn't read unless he was quiet and laid on his pillow. He didn't and so I didn't and that produced another screaming fit ending in time out.

Tomorrow we have a doctor's appointment for Baby A at 3pm and a double home visit from our foster agency worker and Baby A's new CPS case worker. It will be the first time we meet the new case worker and we are hoping things go better with her than with the previous one who was a bit of a disaster.

Swim Lessons and Astronauts

On Monday, we were slow getting out of the house. I'd been up all night working on finalizing some online appendices that are referenced in my recently published book. Jeff took care of Baby A when she woke up in the middle of the night. In the morning, all three kids needed baths or showers. Mondays are Baby A's visitation sessions with bio mom, so we make sure that she's had a bath in the morning. Henry and Miss R were in need of showers, which they didn't get the night before b/c we were at my parents' house for dinner. Henry and Miss R were super slow at their respective showers. Miss R was a bit poky about washing her hair. Once she was out of the shower, it took awhile to wrangle Henry into the shower, which he then didn't want to leave. They didn't make it easy when it came to getting them into daycare either. Mondays are tough. Three kids, a huge bag filled with their cot sheets, crib sheets, and blankets for naps, Baby A's bottles, a bag of things to accompany Baby A on her afternoon CPS visit, plus the infamous CPS car seat. Henry and Miss R refused to go out the free side door and instead insisted on going out the side door blocked by Baby A's usual car seat. Ugh.

In the afternoon, Jeff took The Twins to their swim lessons. Today was the start of the new session. Miss R is in the Flounder class, and Henry is in the Pollywog class. Jeff reported that Miss R is the only one in her class, so she basically has private lessons. All in all, she did really well. She even went underwater and didn't cry. She later told me that she blew bubbles out of her nose. Her one hang-up is touching the side of the pool. For some reason, the idea of hanging on the pool wall freaks her out. Henry is in a class with two other kids who are brothers (one is 3.5 years old and the other is 5). It was their first time taking swim lessons. Although Henry was admonished on several occasions, the 3.5 year old was admonished even more than Henry and was told to sit out of the pool after not listening (which happened to Henry last session). Jeff was happy that "Henry" was the most used word of the class. He suspects that Henry and the 3.5 year old will become friends. They got into trouble together at one point, sneaking off to the side to get pool toys while the instructor worked with the 5 year old. I stayed at home b/c that's where CPS drops off Baby A after the visitation.

After their swim lessons, Jeff took them to Sunflower. Henry dropped a jar of hummus on the floor, which made a mess. Jeff said that the staff was very nice about it. Then, Jeff took the kids to the fruit section. Henry picked out a red apple, which he dubbed "the poison apple!" He hasn't seen Snow White in a long time, but seems to remember the most vivid parts of it.

Henry ate fairly well at dinner. He at least tried carrot sticks (thin ones) dipped in ranch. He had a peanut butter and jelly bagel upon request. He also ate several grapes and a pickle. Then, he wanted his Panda Bear cereal. Miss R was cute, but not the most efficient of eaters this evening. I took Baby A on a dog walk so that she could see her favorite neighbor Hal and coo at him, which she did. When I returned, Henry was listening to his Toy Story book on CD. Miss R was playing with dinosaurs.

I put Baby A to bed. Jeff had the toddlers brush their teeth, and then tucked them in and read them a story. Henry visited me after Jeff left them, claiming that he wanted cold water with lemon (can't forget the lemon). He had a few sips and then marched back to bed.

Jeff and I talked after the kids were asleep. He really likes Henry's new class. The new class has a definite curriculum. This week, it is a space theme. Henry told Jeff about astronauts. We think that he really likes being exposed to new ideas. When I dropped him off this morning, the class was around the teacher who was reading them a book. Henry was absorbed. I took Miss R to class and then passed Henry's class again and he really has fabulous concentration (when he wants to, that is).

Problems With Doing Things Too Early

On Friday afternoon, we were visited by Marsha, an OT who is nationally and internationally known for her work in the area of feeding behaviors in children. She visited our house to see Baby A. Henry had been a patient at her clinic (via early intervention) but was seen by one of her colleagues. The reason for the visit was that I felt that Baby A's sucking wasn't quite adequate. While she has gained weight (not setting any records but is slowly gaining), I have been concerned that if her suck continued to be "lazy," we'd run into problems in a couple months when she'll be expected to consume more. As it is, she is only taking 4-5 ozs at best in a sitting.

Marsha pretty much pegged the problem within 30 seconds of watching her eat. I could tell that she'd figured it out, but she let me talk about Baby A's history and our observations. I told her how it seemed like Baby A was ahead on several gross motor skills, but I thought that her trunk wasn't particularly strong, which is interesting because most skills develop from the trunk.

When Henry was 2 months adjusted, he "rolled over" and we thought we had a gross motor skills genius on our hands. As it turned out, his neonatalogist at the development clinic wasn't pleased because the way he rolled was by stiffening his legs and not by turning himself from the hips. Lesson: It isn't just reaching a milestone that matters but how that milestone was accomplished.

Fast forward nearly 3 years later, we thought that we had another gross motor genius on our hands. Baby A was doing tummy time like a pro before 2 months [Henry hated tummy time until AFTER he learned to crawl at 8 months adjusted]. Around 2.5 months, she could lift her head high while on her tummy for a good 5 minutes + and roll from back to tummy. It looked OK to us b/c she wasn't stiffening her body to do the roll as our son had done. Before 3 months, she was doing 180s on her tummy [Henry did his first 180 at about 7 months adjusted]. At 4 months, she was rolling back to tummy. Although she has a desire to sit up lately and has had pretty awesome head control since she came to use at 2 days, I've noticed that her trunk seemed kind of shaky.

During the bottle feeding, Baby A extended her back a bit, which Marsha noticed right away. Marsha suspects that the sucking issues are a result of Baby A having overdeveloped back muscles but underdeveloped tummy muscles. She says that when babies extend back, it affects their swallowing skills. One doesn't swallow optimally when in a extended position.

The good news for Baby A is that we've had her on reflux medication for a couple weeks now, which will hopefully minimize her need to extend backward to alleviate the reflux pain. Marsha has given us some excellent tips for encouraging the tucked position. She thinks that if we encourage more tucked positioning and a bit less back extending, the swallowing will come more naturally in the next month or so.

One observation that she has about child development is that when kids do things "early," it is usually because they are overcompensating with another muscle group. In Baby A's case, she has overdeveloped back muscles, which are allowing to her to do these skills, but not optimally. And that matters because if she doesn't have the balanced tummy muscles that could potentially impede skills down the road. Marsha said that if a kid ever seems like they are a month or two "ahead" on a skill, it gives a therapist pause. Optimal development tends to follow a set pattern. So while some kids may be a couple weeks ahead of another kid generally, when the gap is really huge, there's probably an underlying reason.

Marsha talked with Cuyler, Henry's former OT, before visiting. She didn't do an evaluation on Henry, but said that if we wanted one, we could set up an appointment later. We think that Henry's doing well on the fine motor and eating front. She did give us some great tips for feeding toddlers. Her approach for feeding kids 2.5-4 years old is: Dippers, Dips, and Crumbs. She said that kids like doing things, so the act of dipping foods makes a boring meal more fun. Dippers can be carrots, pretzels, dried fruit, whatever. Dips can be hummus, yogurt, guacamole, etc. And crumbs make the food extra exciting. For example, one could use dried apples to dip in yogurt and then dip in crumbs of graham crackers. That helps incorporate a couple food groups while make the act of eating fun. I mentioned to Marsha that Henry tested out of early intervention but I thought the DAYC test was for lack of a better term "lame." She had a smile on her face when I said that. She said that I should feel comfortable telling them that I wanted him retested if I thought the test wasn't appropriate. It's tempting.

It was Friday. She was about ready to go home when Henry rudely said, "You are going to go home now." He basically tried to usher her out the door because it was interfering with his plans to watch Toy Story 2. I told him that he was being rude. I'm sure it sunk in and that he learned a lot from the admonishment.

I took the dogs for a walk. Jeff made dinner. The kids watched Toy Story 2. Baby A slept.

The kids ate very well at dinner. Two kinds of french fries, meat balls, corn, grapes, and chocolate pudding. We didn't have to nag. That was so nice!

After dinner, Jeff took the kids up to Yvonne's house to see her sunflower. He took the dogs too, so they got two walks in the evening. Baby A woke up while they were out. She polished off a 5 ozs bottle within a couple minutes. I made sure that she didn't extend her body. Jeff brushed the kids' teeth. I read them their evening books. Henry did somersaults on his bed. I asked him if that was good idea. He said, "Yes!" Sigh. He managed to bonk his head against the wall and headboard but persisted in telling me that his stunts were good ideas.

On Saturday, we went to Joel’s in the morning for breakfast. Henry ran around the courtyard. He climbed on a ledge that was about three feet high. I said, “Henry, jumping from there is not a good idea.” So he jumped anyway and fell on his backside and said “Ow” under his breath. Occasionally mother does know best. We visited the turtle pond after that. It was hot and Henry looked exhausted from the heat. Jeff took Baby A to get the car. While we waited, Henry announced he had to go poop. Of course. I asked him to hold it for 5 minutes. I had my office keys in the car and hoped to run Henry over to my office, which was only a block away. Henry, however, hid behind a tree and things happened before we made it to the bathroom. Fortunately, it wasn’t a big mess. And the silver lining is that he definitely knows when he needs to go to the bathroom. He just needs some work on anticipating those needs a couple minutes before he hits crisis stage. I stayed at school and worked. Jeff took the kids to my parents for awhile and then took them home. They didn’t nap.

On Saturday night, we went to the Desert Museum with our friends Carolyn, Zak, Adelyn, and Spencer. The kids were relatively well-behaved, and Henry was excited to see Adelyn. Henry asked questions of one of the docents doing a station on owls. “What’s that?” was asked as he pointed at various objects on her table. We got to another station with a person holding an owl. Henry made his way through the crowd so it was hard for me to get to him as he tried to climb up on the table in front of the owl. He enjoyed the cave. I took him and Miss R up the top part of it, which I loved as a child. Miss R wasn’t thrilled with that part and wanted me to hold her, but the ceiling was too low and side walls too narrow. She and Henry really liked playing in the sand. The animal highlights included seeing the mountain lions walk around and watching the beaver swim. When visiting the museum during the day, the mountain lions and beaver are often asleep, so it was a treat.

On Sunday, I dropped off Baby A with my parents and took The Twins to see Toy Story 3 in 3D with Aunt Carolyn. The kids were well-behaved. Before the movie, we went to the play area in the mall. Aunt Carolyn gave the kids quarters to ride some play things. At the movie, Miss R sat in a seat by herself for the entire movie, which is a first. After the movie, we stopped by Party City. I bought the kids costumes. Henry picked out a Woody outfit. Miss R had a choice between Cinderella, Tinkerbell, Snow White, and Ariel outfits. She picked out an Ariel dress. I knew that Jeff wouldn’t be thrilled with the choice as Ariel is his least favorite Disney heroine, but I’ve heard that you are supposed to give kids choices. When we got to my parents, I let them put on their costumes. They looked as cute as could be.

I took Baby A back home with me and got some work done. We went back to my parents around 7PM for dinner. Aunt Gloria, Aunt Erin, and Uncle Brian also came to dinner. When we arrived, Henry was sound asleep. He started napping at 6PM. Miss R didn't nap at all. She got very silly toward the end of the evening as she often does when she is tired. Henry played with Aunt Erin afternoon dinner. They were in Erin's old room playing with toys that my mom had put back there since Henry hadn't played with them in awhile. He enjoyed that.

Guitar Found!

On Tuesday, we had a visit from a couple who are prospective foster parents. Our agency requires meetings between prospective foster parents and regulars to help socialize new foster parents and build networks. The prospectives honestly didn't seem like they were walking into fostering without a clear understand of what's involved. One gal works as a probation officer at the juvenile courts and has sat in on many hearings. The other gal was raised in a family that did a lot of fostering. And they have a son, so it isn't like the parent-thing will be new to them completely. They seemed like great foster parent candidates.

We then headed to my parents' house for dinner. Aunt Carolyn had arrived! Henry gave her a huge hug.

On Wednesday, my parents picked up The Twins at school. They gave them dinner. Sausage was a big hit. And then brought them home. At 8:30PM, I abandoned Jeff with the three kids so that I could meet Carolyn at the movie theater to watch Twlight: Eclipse. When I asked Jeff if that'd be OK, he said, "Well, there may be a lot of crying, but I'll manage."

On Thursday, I asked Miss Amanda if Henry had gotten into trouble. She said no. I mentioned that Henry thought a teacher was mad at him. She said that on Wednesday, a kid tried to kick Henry so Henry pushed the kid back. She called him over and asked what happened. Henry said, "He started it." She asked him to tell the kid "That's not nice" before resorting to pushing. But he didn't get into trouble. I had told her the first day that Henry wasn't usually a "first-strike" kid, but if pushed, he would push back. And I was actually pleased that Henry held his ground. I was a little worried about him being in a class with near four-year olds and getting pushed around too much. I just don't want him to be bullied. I don't think that will be a problem. And I *think* that we can get him to switch into using words before fists. And hopefully the kid who tried to kick him knows that Henry won't take things lying down so he won't do it again.

Henry had a good Thursday at school. Miss Amanda went on break before the kids' nap time and then got concerned b/c she forget to tell the other teacher to take off Henry's glasses before nap. But Henry had done it on his own. He put his glasses on a table near his cot.

Getting Henry and Miss R out of daycare was a big, huge pain. I picked up Henry first. Then got Miss R. She wanted me to hold her. Then she wanted me to put her down. I put her down and she threw a fit b/c she wanted to be held. We are not catering to her split-requests of yes/no, up/down, want it/don't want it. So she threw herself down on the floor while Henry sprinted down the hall toward the lobby. I ended up picking up a crying Miss R and running after him. I told Miss R that she was not allowed in the babies room if she was crying. So she balled right outside the door. Some baby is always sleeping, so I didn't think it was fair to bring a tantrum-throwing tot into the room. Henry loves the baby room. He got into their toys while I collected Baby A's things. Once Miss R stopped her tears, I let her into the room. Then, Henry threw a tantrum when I tried to get him to leave the room to go home. Oy vey!

While in the car, Henry announced that he wanted to watch Toy Story. I asked him about his day. He repeated his Toy Story request. When we got home, he said it again. I said, "You didn't tell me about your day, so no Toy Story." So Henry finally responded, "I went to school and played with my friends. I went to school and played with my friends. I went to school and played with my friends. And then I watched Toy Story." He is a bit cheeky.

Jeff put on Toy Story 2. That was fine until Henry decided to bop Miss R on the head. It wasn't a big bop, but it was a first-strike that was unprovoked. Miss R produced tears. I said, "R, you'll be fine. It wasn't a major hit, although it was uncalled for and inappropriate. Let's practice telling Henry off. Repeat after me, 'Henry, that's not nice. We don't hit in this family.'" Miss R practiced telling Henry off. The tears went away as she sternly said, "Henry, that's not nice. We don't hit!" Unlike Henry, Miss R doesn't have any interest in retaliatory hits. I think words are her preferred response (she only occasionally does something physically inappropriate, like her biting Henry the other day). Meanwhile, Jeff put Henry in timeout. Henry cried and cried. Jeff had turned off the TV before I left, but I told him that I didn't think that was fair to Miss R who had also been watching TV. So he put on her favorite movie Mamma Mia!. I took the dogs for a walk without Baby A as she was having lot of fun on her jungle mat. She loves her new found rolling skills. According to Jeff, when I left the house with the dogs, he heard the closing of a door. Apparently, Henry had gone out to the garage on his own, went through the garage and out the side door, and was found walking down the driveway calling out for me. Twenty-minutes later, I returned to find Henry still in tears over Toy Story being turned off. He made a plea to turn it back on. I told him that if he was on good behavior for the next day, we'd consider letting him watch it again. I managed to get rid of his tears by letting him play with my Russian doll set.

I abandoned the kids and Jeff in the evening again so that I could go to dinner with my mom and sisters. Baby A apparently slept as soon as I left around 7:15PM. She woke up shortly before I came home at 10:10PM. The kids didn't wear out Jeff too much. I gather that they made tunnels out of the couch cushions.

Baby A wasn't sleepy after her bottle. She wanted to play and was in her crib kicking up her feet. Very cute. We let her play on the jungle mat. And when she showed some subtle signs of sleepiness, I got her pacifier and held her on the couch. We fell asleep. At 2:30PM, I put her in her crib and went to bed.

Baby A slept until 8:15AM this morning when I woke her up b/c we had to get ready for school. She's normally quite happy first thing in the morning, but she was very grumpy over me waking her up. The kids were already fed. Baby A took a 5.5 oz bottle for me. I then switched off with Jeff so I could do Miss R's hair. Jeff found Henry's missing guitar. It had been missing for a year and had been a beloved toy from Aunt Erin and Uncle Brian. Henry was having fun with it. He played the music and Miss R danced. When the music stopped, Miss R asked with her arms shrugged, "What happened to the music?"

The drop off was uneventful. I like uneventful.

On today's docket, we have a visit from an OT who is one of the nation's experts in feeding issues. I called Meal Time Connections for Baby A at the recommendation of her developmental coordinator from the Blake Foundation. I want her suck pattern evaluated b/c I think it is a tad weak. Meal Time Connections also handled Henry's OT needs when he was in early intervention. His OT is out of town. So we were called by Marsha Dunn Klein, who has written books on child-food issues and gives seminars nationally and internationally on the subject. She mentioned to us when she made the appointment yesterday that she'd like to check up on Henry too. I've never met her, but I've heard about her. Am looking forward to this appointment.

Like Grandpa, Like Grandson

When I dropped Henry at his new classroom today, Miss Amanda said that Henry did very well yesterday. I asked her if he socialized with the other kids. She said, "Not so much." He spent his time checking out the room. At one point, she didn't think that he was paying attention to the story that she had read the kids. So she asked Henry about the story. Despite appearing not to have paid attention, Henry recounted the whole story. She was impressed. It reminded me of my dad. On several occasions, I have not believed that my father was paying attention when I was saying something. But then at a moment of exasperation of not being listened to, my dad will recount what I've said. Couldn't help but smile at the resemblance between my dad and my son.

Jeff and I left in separate cars to get the kids. Miss R was scheduled to have her last bio sibling visit this afternoon. I went to pick up Baby A to take her to WIC to get this month's food vouchers for her formula. And Jeff took Henry to an eye doctor appointment.

We left the house and arrived at the daycare at the same time. I went with Jeff to pick up Henry just so that I could hear about his day. Again, "Henry had a very good day," according to Miss Amanda. He impressed her with his ability to answer questions at the end of the story. She read a story and asked questions at the end of the story to the class. Henry answered them. She asked, "What is the environment?" Henry's answer: "The world around us." Then she asked, "What is garbarge?" Henry's answer: "It's trash." She said that she didn't expect that ability of a young three. Jeff and I were of course pleased.

WIC was efficient and uneventful, which is good. I'm highly impressed by a government organization that actually runs efficiently (excluding the gobs of required paperwork). The eye doctor appointment was also uneventful, according to Jeff. They didn't dialate his eyes, and Henry wasn't cooperative when it came to reading the little pictures (used instead of letters to test kids' vision). He has another appointment scheduled for November.

A New Class

With the fireworks and all last night, the kids stayed up late. So it wasn't a surprise that everyone was slow moving this morning. In potty news, Henry did it all this morning before we left the house. We were delighted, especially since he was starting his new class.

We didn't get out of the house until almost 10AM. Jeff and I decided that the kids should go to daycare today, so that we could get ahead on our work as we'll be taking some time off when Jeff's sister, mom, and nephews visit and we officially adopt Miss R in two weeks!

Henry started his new class today. He is now in one of the three year old classes. We gather that most of the younger threes are in the potty training class, but as Henry is in one of the two already potty trained classes, his class contains some older 3s (who are nearly 4). His new teacher will be Miss Lola, but she wasn't there today. Miss Amanda was his teacher today (and I think that she is in that class most of the time). Miss Amanda was great. She said "I know that this is supposed to be a potty trained class, but does he need the occasional reminder?" I was thrilled at that. Yes, indeed. He could use the occasional reminder. And she wanted to know if she should take his glasses off him before he goes out on the playground. Considering that he's on pair five, I thought that was a excellent idea if she was willing. And did he have any special dietary constraints? I was overjoyed by Miss Amanda's attention to detail.

Henry's new classroom has four computers in it. There's a cute cubby hole filled with pillows. It is a nice classroom. And, Henry now gets to use the big kids playground! After I dropped him off, the class was just about to go on the playground. I was tempted to stay and watch from the car, but I decided that I really needed to get some work done.

We picked up the kids at 5PM. We weren't sure whether or not CPS was going to hold bio parent visits today (no communication about changes to the schedule was given). But we figured that they might be closed for the holiday. Turned out that Baby A was not picked up. So, we took her and The Twins to get the car washed and to Basha's. Henry was a challenge at the grocery store. He and Miss R were in a police car that made up the front of the cart. But he managed to get in and out of it easily. He upset Miss R several times by using the word "monster." He would say "Monster! Roaaaaar!" and Miss R would burst into tears. I'm not sure what she did to Henry, but he claimed that she hurt his feelings. I honestly found this hard to believe as I wasn't aware that Henry had the capacity to internalize criticism of any sort.

The cashier gave Henry and Miss R balloons. She then peaked at Baby A who started crying, which made the cashier jump back and apologize several times (not that it was a big deal at all. Baby A was just wanting her pacifier.).

Jeff made a fabulous zucchini fettuccine dish. Henry wouldn't eat it of course. But Miss R really enjoyed it. She loved slurping up the long noodles.

I ate quickly and then took Baby A for a walk with the dogs before it got too dark. We ran into Hal. Jeff has taken Baby A for walks the last two nights, and he noted how Baby A coos every time she sees Hal. Tonight was no different. As soon as Hal approach us, she started cooing away. The funny thing is that Hal really isn't a baby-person. He said it tonight, but I kind of figured that was the case, although he's always been very nice to Henry and Miss R. He's looking forward to Henry being old enough to throw a baseball around. Baby A has certainly won Hal over with her sweetness.

When we got back, Henry and Miss R were taking turns wearing fairy wings. Henry found some high heels that matched the wings. I put Baby A to bed and Jeff put The Twins to bed. Henry added "boogie" issues and "I need a nightgown" to his list of ways to extend bedtime.

Fireworks vs. TV

On Saturday night, the kids watched Mamma Mia!. Miss R requested repeats on the songs "Does Your Mother Know" and "Voulez Vous." She was cute dancing but refused to dance or sing when I had the camera out. She gets that from Jeff.

On Sunday, the kids slept in and played around the house in the morning. Jeff set up the flower sprinkler for them outside, so we all ran around the sprinkler for awhile. Baby A got fussy around 11:30AM or so. I took her to the back and we co-slept on the bed for two hours, which was really nice. Meanwhile, Jeff let the kids take a bath so that they could play in the water. They spent time on their backs floating in an inch of water. They seem to be getting more and more comfortable with the idea of being on their backs in water. The Twins took naps for 4 hours! They didn't get up until 5PM.

Baby A got up at 1:30PM, had a bottle, and then played around. She really enjoys being kissed on the cheeks. She was very talkative too. When the kids got up (I believe Miss R was first), they gave her Eskimo kisses. She liked that.

We headed over to my parents house. Aunt Gloria, Aunt Erin, and Uncle Brian came over for dinner. They left before the fireworks began. My parents took care of Baby A while Jeff and I took The Twins up on the roof to watch the fireworks. Henry was impatient and complained. The first fireworks to go off were at La Paloma. He was bored and repeated a billion times how he wanted to get down. So Jeff took him down eventually, thoroughly frustrated. Miss R, however, stayed on the roof. Jeff came back up and joined us. While La Paloma was still going on (a very long show), we also saw the fireworks go off at El Conquistador and A Mountain, plus a few from Marana and the occasional illegal fireworks. Being up on the roof, which was what we did as kids, made me realize how much the property has matured over the years. Trees that didn't reach the roof when I was a child are way above the roof line.

Miss R enjoyed having us to herself, I think. She sang "Honey, Honey" several times and did a very fine job. She requested that I say the Star Light, Star Bright poem several times. We had a long discussion about how the fireworks were "tooting."

Meanwhile, Henry was having a fine old time watching TV. Wubbzy was on, which Henry apparently likes. I don't think that we've ever turned on Nick Jr. before in our house, so it was a treat for him.

On the way home, Henry busted Jeff on driving through a light that wasn't green. According to Jeff, it was yellow. But Henry informed Jeff that it was only on green that one goes. "Green means Go! Not orange." [NOTE: Henry has trouble deciphering orange from red.] The "Green means Go" discussion carried us most of the way home.

When we got home, we played the "I love you more than..." game. Henry told me that he loved me more than Buzz Lightyear movies, which are a pretty big deal to him. Good to know that I rank higher than Buzz!

Jeff is currently trying to get the kids into bed. I can still hear Henry's melodious voice.

Synchronized Bubble Blowing

On Saturday morning, Jeff woke up and find Henry in-between us. He requested breakfast. Around 7:45AM, Baby A was still asleep. Jeff had last fed her around midnight. I decided to wake her up, change her, and get her a bottle. That was the longest she'd ever slept. And while that certainly has its benefits, she's had backend issues and I wanted to make sure she wasn't lying in a soiled diaper and was staying hydrated.

We gave the kids baths this morning. Jeff did Baby A. And then I got Henry and Miss R started. The purpose of the bath for Henry wasn't really getting clean. I was more interested in getting him comfortable with the idea of laying in water. So I let him play in the bathtub with water pouring out of the faucet. Then, I put in the plug and he splashed around. I got him to lay down with about 1" of water in the tub. He initially only did it for a few seconds, flipped on his tummy, but then did the back again, relaxing somewhat. Progress was definitely made. Miss R then joined him in their homemade swimming pool. I put a little more water in the tub and they practiced blowing bubbles together and getting their faces wet. They counted out "1-2-3!" just like Miss Natalie at swim school and then dunked their faces in the water.

Jeff took the "big" kids to the movies. That was his first time taking the kids to the movies on his own. They saw How to Train Your Dragon at the Oracle View, a second-run theater, and then went to lunch at Village Inn.

Today, Baby A turns 4 months old! I was hoping to get some work done while the toddlers were gone. But Baby A was in need of interaction and holding. She enjoyed me singing the ABCs to her and giggled during the song. That was the first time that she's giggled in response to me doing something she thought fun or funny. She slept but only if I held her. I ended up positioning us on the couch to co-sleep so that I could nap as well. Every time I tried to put her in the crib, she protested.

When Jeff came back home, The Twins were sacked out. Miss R got up around 5:30PM. She decided to wear a new blue dress that I got her. She's been looking forward to wearing it. When she got up, she informed me that Henry had to go potty. As he was sound asleep, I'm not sure how she knew that. Perhaps she and Henry have one of those telepathic twin things going on.

Our plans for the evening are simple. Miss R has been requesting "Honey, Honey" for a couple days now. By that, she means that she wants to watch Mamma Mia!. We'll probably give in even though they watched a movie today already. When Mamma Mia! is on, they listen to the music and play their toys rather than really watching it.

"Mommy hurt my feelings."

On Friday, Jeff and I took Baby A to the pediatrician's office because she's had goopy eyes (blocked tear ducts) and diarrhea. Soft stools started Monday night. But it wasn't until Thursday that it was clearly diarrhea. She thankfully is drinking her bottles, so she is not dehydrated. And she has no fever. At the doctor's office, she weighed 12 lbs. For her eyes, we'll be giving her eye drops and massaging the ducts. The staff commented on how cute she is and she demonstrated her new found skill of blowing spit bubbles.

The Twins had good days. Miss R proudly wore a hat that she'd made in class, decorated with red, white, and blue stars.

Henry begged for television. It had been a couple days since we'd had it on, so we let them watch Toy Story 2, which is enjoyable for us as well. Henry spent part of the evening launching himself off of objects. His latest stunt is to climb on the platform of the slide but then jump off it rather than use the slide as it was designed.

There was a pee incident. Henry ran to the bathroom but couldn't hold it and pretty much showered the toilet. If he wasn't so contrary, he might have gotten there earlier had he not tried to argue with us over his need to use the potty.

Baby A had a great time on the floor doing tummy time for several minutes.

Miss R loved a new nightgown that I bought her. Pink and frilly with Dora on it. Henry likes his new Star Wars Lego PJs.

After brushing her teeth, Miss R came out to the living and started drinking her juice. I told her that we don't drink juice after brushing our teeth. She burst into tears and ran to Jeff, telling him that "Mommy hurt my feelings."

I went into her room and told her that I was only trying to protect her teeth so that she'd continue to have a beautiful smile. She accepted this and asked me to snuggle with her as Jeff read them a night time story.

I've been doing foster care paperwork. Oh so much paperwork. I just sent it off. Now I'm going to tackle some professional work. The kids are in bed. So is Jeff. The house is peaceful. The perfect time to get some stuff done.

Henry La Buff: The Case of the Missing Underwear

On Thursday, we had an 8AM visitor...a notary sent from our bank to refinance the house. We actually had no plans to do it, but our bank made an offer so good that we couldn't pass it up. Our theory is that the bank has categorized us as low-risk. By having us refinance, they can say that they've made progress helping X number of families refinance, blah, blah, blah...wasn't the stimulus money worth it. The kids were relatively well-behaved but disheveled looking. Baby A was pretty good during the notary visit. When she'd start to fuss, I'd kiss her face and she'd smile.

Patty came at 9AM to straighten up the house, and the kids were pleased to see her. They love cleaning windows with her. They took the paper towels, rolled them out, and used the bulky part of the roll as a pillow and laid on the flat part they had rolled out. It was cute.

The drop off at school was fine. I didn't get the kids there until 10AM. I went to school and made a lot of progress on my new office. I recycled, threw away, or filed two boxes of paper. It felt good to finally have time to truly organize...which hasn't really happened since before Henry's birth. I have two more stacks to go. I'll definitely be starting off the fall right!

I picked up the kids at 5:15PM. Miss R was sitting on her blanket with a friend when I arrived. I heard several voices say, "R, your mom is here!" She turned around and came running to me with excitement. Got to savor these moments while I can! We then went to get Henry. We watched him playing with play-doh through the window. He was happy to see us. And then we picked up Baby A. I was hungry, having forgotten to eat lunch. So we swung by Eegee's before heading home.

After dinner, the kids played. Around 8:35PM, I headed out the door to go to Babies R Us to pick up some red, white, and blue outfits for the kids as Friday's theme at school is red, white, and blue day. As Baby A was in need of her bottle routine before bed, Jeff only read the kids one book and told them that they had to go to sleep. Henry got out of bed. Jeff, without really looking at him, told him to go straight to bed.

When I arrived back home around after 9:30PM, all of the kids were asleep. I first went over to Miss R's bed and checked her. She had her face buried under a pillow, so I removed it. Then, I went to check on Henry who was laying on his stomach. He didn't have the shirt he'd had on earlier. When I readjusted his blankets, I discovered that he was sans clothing. I tucked him in with an extra blanket. I then went to Jeff and said, "Did you know that Henry wasn't wearing any clothes?" Jeff laughed and said, "No. He had clothes on when he went to bed." Jeff thinks that maybe Henry took off his clothes when he got out of bed and Jeff wasn't paying attention. For some reason, Henry takes off all of his clothes (including shirt) when he uses the potty. The pants part I understand. He has to stand on a stool to pee standing up in the regular potty. Standing up with the Elmo potty is a no-go. When he stands on a stool, he doesn't like the pants around his ankles. The no-shirt thing, I can't explain.

Henry got up this morning around 6:20AM. I was playing with Baby A in the living room. I asked Henry where his clothes were. He said the clothes hamper, but they weren't there. I did a search. Took awhile, but I found them at the top of his bed crammed between the mattress and the head board. They weren't wet, which was great news. Henry used the potty like a big boy when I asked him to. He is truly doing a good job with the potty training.

Henry brought a new pair of underwear for me to put on him. Dinosaur underwear. Then, he crawled into bed with Jeff and snuggled. Miss R then got up. She called out for Daddy. So I helped her out of bed and got her to Jeff's and my room. Henry wanted breakfast and came out with me to the kitchen. Miss R stayed with Jeff and snuggled.



We managed to get the dishes put away and the kids fed, clothed, and out the door by 8:45AM. The kids even had time to play a little before we left. At school, Henry and Miss R wanted to play with the babies. It took me forever to get Henry out of the baby room. I talked with the developmental coordinator. She's moving Henry up to Miss Lola's room Monday. I then introduced myself to Lola and Amanda. I've met Amanda once before (a couple weeks ago). She knew we had a new baby who wasn't on cow's milk formulas, so she offered me her son's soy formulas, which was nice. We weren't able to take her up on the offer as Baby A is on Alimentum, but it was nice that she tracked me down. Henry's new classroom has computers in it, so I'm sure he'll be thrilled at the location change. It will be sad, however, not to see Joaquin every day though.

Early Risers

On Wednesday morning, I fed Baby A around 4AM. After eating and snoozing in my arms, she refused the crib and didn't want to co-sleep. Jeff held her as I was dead tired having stayed up to finish editing a senior honors thesis. The student was on a tight deadline. Jeff managed to get Baby A back to bed by 6AM, but then Henry decided to get up.

The drop off at school was fine. Miss R has been reluctant to let me leave her, which is sad. Henry seems pretty happy to go to his class (still the old class). And Baby A is always the easiest of the three of them.

The Twins had their final swim lesson of the session. We've signed them up for more lessons, which start the second week of July. Miss R will stay in the Flounders class, and Henry will move up to the Pollywogs. Miss Natalie said that Miss R needs to continue working on dunking and getting her face wet, but she's doing very well at floating. Henry is doing well at everything but floating.

We went to Grammy and Poppy's house afterward and went swimming. Henry and Miss R had fun riding me like a horse, using my swim suit straps at the back as reighs. Then, we had dinner. At 8:35PM, I rushed off to Sunflower to get my coconut milk before the store closed. Jeff drove the kids home. All three were asleep by the time they arrived.

That's all from here...

Play-Doh and Dancing

On Tuesday, I dropped off the kids at school. It always takes longer than it should. They were supposed to start "transitioning" Henry to the 3 year old room, but the developmental coordinator was on a field trip, so they didn't try it. I guess it takes the title of "developmental coordinator" to walk a kid over to his new classroom and let him hang out there part of the day.

I picked up the kids at 4:15PM. Henry was laying on the floor. His friends thought I was funny b/c I hid behind a toy shelf so Henry wouldn't see me. They kind of gave me away though. Miss Valerie said that he had a good day.

When Henry and I appeared in Miss R's class, Miss R freaked out when other kids ran to me. She yelled, "That's my mommy, not your mommy!" several times. Baby A seemed to have had a good day and did some rolling for Miss Cecy.

We rushed home in time for our appointment with Christy from St. Nick's. The kids and dogs formed the welcoming committee. We signed a final form for her. I really like Christy. She has a happy disposition, but I can tell that she's also pragmatic in her assessments of the world. I like that combination. Not to mention that she always does what she says she is going to do. Very competent on paperwork. Why can't all caseworkers be like her?

Baby A was in fine form during the visit. She cooed as she played on the floor. Miss R was very happy and made "hamburgers" for me and Jeff as we signed paperwork. She and Henry really like making pretend food. Henry spent most of the time in the train room reading. He did, however, come out in his sparkly pink-jeweled high heels at one point, which made Christy laugh. His feet are the perfect length for those shoes, but his feet are getting a little wide for them. Nevertheless, he navigates the terrain pretty well in high heels (a benefit of all that toe-walking, I suppose).

After Christy left, we played with Play-doh (thanks Carolyn, Zak, Adelyn, and Spencer!). Henry ordered me to make animal cut outs in the Play-doh as he ate his snack. Then, we had dinner.

After dinner, Jeff took Baby A for a walk with the dogs. I stayed with the kids. They started to have a dispute on the slide. I ended up pulling Henry off the slide and kissing and tickling him to diffuse the situation. Then Miss R came down from the slide to be kissed and tickled too. I put on some music, and the kids danced. Miss R really wanted Henry to dance with her. But he kept saying "You are not my true love." So I danced with her. When Jeff came back from the walk, Miss R asked him to dance. And Jeff did...but only when the camera was off (he's as bad as The Twins). I asked Henry to dance, but he told me that I wasn't his true love either. Apparently, a true love is someone who will dance with you. That calls Jeff's and my "true love" status into question! ;)

Those are today's highlights. Signing off...

Potty Progress and Rolling

The morning started for me at 6AM, when Baby A started making noises. She usually cries out in desperation for her milk. She was noisy, but in a happy, playful kind of way. She'd managed to turn around 180 while on her back. That's definitely new. And she is enjoying her ability to lift her legs into the air.

In a big move this morning, Henry finally requested to use the potty when he got up! Yes! That's huge. He struggled with me yesterday, claiming that he didn't need to go. When I made him go, he pretty much could have doubled for Jimmy Dugan in the pee scene from A League of Their Own, which ends with Madonna's character Mae saying to Dugan "Boy, that was some good peeing." I have no doubt that Henry has great capacity to hold it, but there's no point on waiting for a misfire.

Getting the kids out of the house wasn't as chaotic as usual this morning. It helped that I had braided Miss R's hair last night, so she was ready to go once she got her clothes on. Baby A fell asleep in the car and was still sleeping when I handed her off to her teachers. Miss R didn't want to get out of the car, announcing that she was staying with me. When Jeff's mom, sister, and nephews visit in a couple weeks, she'll have extended no-school time then.

I talked with the developmental coordinator about moving Henry to a 3 year old classroom. She said that he had to have had no accidents for two weeks. I said that she could talk to Miss Stephanie or Miss Valerie and that he hadn't had an accident in three weeks. She said that they'd consider "transitioning" him...whatever that means.

I talked with our family specialist who sent off a response to Baby A's caseworker and the caseworker's supervisor. It basically said that she disagreed with the statements in Friday's email from the caseworker and the transport coordinator, but she thanked the caseworker for planning to provide a car seat. I'm sure that went over well with the caseworker (*sarcasm*). I decided not to respond as our family specialist pretty well said what needed to be said, and I'm trying to avoid a confrontation, although events later in the day suggest that she may have taken some subtle retaliatory measures against us.

We picked up The Twins at 3:30PM for swim lessons. Apparently, the developomental coordinator is creating a new test for Henry, seeing if he will wet himself if he is never asked to go potty, even though they do prompt the kids to go to the bathroom even in the potty-trained classrooms. She's really got a misguided authoritarian streak going on. At swim lessons, Henry was not excited about floating on his back. He wouldn't let go of the instructor's hair. I thought that Miss R did pretty well floating though. She also seemed to do a pretty good "froggy dive." The Twins favorite part was floating on the "magic carpet," which is a floating foam pad. We've gone ahead and signed them up for classes in July.

We headed back home after the lesson so that we'd be home when Baby A arrived. Dealing with more CPS nuttiness, but I'm not going to write about it. Simply too exhausting.

We had an early dinner b/c I had forgotten to eat lunch and was hungry. The kids watched Toy Story 2. While they did so, Baby A rolled over back to tummy!

I took Baby A on a walk with the dogs. We ran into Hal. Baby A grabbed Hal's finger and wouldn't get go so he walked with us for a couple minutes. Baby A was cooing at him the entire time. We parted from Hal and our other neighbor Jenine, her son, and grand daughter. We walked across the wash and up the road before the first house. A black car with major black tinting came our way. The window on the passenger side of the car rolled down. Hard to describe, but the cast of characters inside could have stepped out of Pulp Fiction. The driver wanted to know where a particular street was. I gave him directions, and they were off. They freaked me out. Perhaps it is all of the talk of drop houses being located in upper middle class neighborhoods owing to the past month's major bust. A house on the other side of our neighbors had suspicious nightly activity going on according to a couple neighbors. Perhaps it was the cop cars roaming our quiet out of the way neighborhood a couple days ago. Yeeesh.

Jeff played with The Twins. He did airplanes with them (where he holds their hands and lift them into the air with his legs). Miss R slipped on one, but she managed to rebound without distress. Henry decided that airplanes were most fun when he let go of Daddy's hands and then clung completely to Daddy's feet. The night ended without injury.

On tomorrow's agenda is a home visit from Miss R's caseworker from St. Nick's to sign some final paperwork.

Signing off from The Wild Kingdom...

"Take my hand. Let's dance."

On Sunday, we had decided not to go anywhere. We usually go somewhere each weekend day, but today we wanted to have an easy going day. In retrospect, staying home with three children (especially two toddlers) can never be described as "easy going." Henry was in classic Henry form, driving Jeff crazy with his opposition at every turn.

I gave the kids showers in the morning. The carrot for getting them into the shower was pulling out Miss R's Beauty and the Beast Belle dress and Henry's Spiderman outfit. They happily took their showers so that they could wear their costumes. Once they were in their outfits, Henry said to Miss R, "Take my hand. Let's dance."

I went to Jeff's desk to get some CDs. Meanwhile, I heard Henry run after Miss R saying, "Kiss me. Kiss me. You're my true love." Henry was trying to reenact Beauty and the Beast. They'd been reading it in their Story Reader earlier in the morning. Once the music got going, Henry again asked Miss R to take his hand and dance. She said no. He again used the "true love" plea, but she wanted to go swimming in the ball pit. So Henry sat down with his Story Read and read instead. By then, of course, Miss R wanted to dance, but Henry said no. So she said, "But you're my true love." Her dancing plea fell on deaf ears however. Henry's attention was on the book. Jeff laughingly said, "I'm afraid that ship has sailed." Miss R sternly told him, "No, Daddy." The kids horsed around the living room throughout the morning. Henry enjoyed being Spiderman, and Miss R loved being Belle.

The kids had macaroni and cheese for lunch. They didn't protest too much when told it was time for a nap. I fed Miss R on the couch and fell asleep. She'd been up since 6AM. Once the kids were asleep, Jeff headed off the estate to get supplies at the grocery store. Henry got up before Miss R did, but both took decent naps.

I made steamed artichokes for an appetizer. Miss R really seemed to like it. Jeff thought that it was too much work for little food, and Henry refused to try it. The kids were pains about eating their dinner. Having talked about chicken nuggets for hours, Henry didn't want to eat those on his plate. Miss R did pretty well on her chicken nuggets and ate all of her corn, but she refused to try to fruit salad.

We let them watch a Sponge Bob episode before bed while I braided Miss R's hair. I am hoping that the braids stay in place come morning.

Tomorrow, Baby A has a visitation with bio mom. And I plan to talk with the daycare about getting Henry into the 3 year old potty trained classroom.

A Quarter

On Saturday morning, Baby A was the first one up. Jeff had fed her at 4AM, so I got up at 6AM. She was happy as could be. She did, however, vomit up breakfast, which got into her hair. As a result, she was bathed. Her hair was particularly curly after it.

We took the kids to the Children's Museum. We hadn't been there in a long time. Henry and Miss R loved it. It was a bit harder keeping track of the two of them while holding Baby A. We ran into the kids' dentist, Dr. Bunch. Jeff and I chatted with him for a little bit. He's a very nice person and an excellent pediatric dentist. When we first saw him, we had a hard time placing him as he was out of context for us. It was busy at the museum, but the kids got to see and touch everything that they wanted to. All in all, a good trip.

We had a late lunch at IHOP. Henry was loud and generally uncooperative, but he ate fairly well. Miss R ate some. After lunch, we headed to my parents' house. It was about 2:45PM and the kids had not yet napped. My parents offered to take care of them so that Jeff and I could watch a movie. Henry dosed in the car but became alert when I tried to put him on my parents' bed. Miss R slept soundly. Jeff got Henry back to bed, where he stayed for all of 20 minutes claiming to have napped.

Poppy asked Henry to go potty. Henry said no, he didn't want to go potty. My dad asked again for him to go potty. Henry said no. Then, Poppy said, "Henry, I'll give you a quarter if you go potty." Henry said, "Yeah!" and then ran off to the bathroom. So Henry managed to earn a quarter for peeing. Just wondering what kind of precendent this sets!

Jeff and I went to the Oracle View, a second-run theater, to see Kick-Ass, which is can be described as Kill Bill meets Napoleon Dynamite. We picked up dinner for everyone and came home. Before dinner, we went swimming with Henry and Miss R. Henry didn't eat well for dinner, but Miss R managed to polish off her rice and half of Henry's.

I'm sure that I'm missing cute Henry-isms and R-isms. But I'm exhausted. So I'm going to sign off.

A Day of Hearings

On Friday morning, I dropped off Henry and Baby A but took Miss R to an appointment with Henry's ENT. Sometimes it seems like she can't hear. Is that a reflection of a hearing problem or toddler stubbornness? Before Miss R's CMDP insurance ends, I figured that it was best to get her tested. She has fluid in one ear, where there is mild hearing loss, and a retracted ear drum in the other. Dr. Dean thinks that we should wait two months, have him look at the situation again, before moving to ear tubes.

I dropped Miss R off at school. Then headed to Baby A's hearing. I talked with her lawyer for a couple minutes before the hearing. He'd received the update from his assistant Martha. I told him that I wasn't sure it was a good idea to mention the whole car seat debacle. I really didn't want to anger the caseworker. In his opinion, it was appropriate to mention in court b/c he said that for liability reasons, we should NOT have to be providing the car seat for CPS' driving service. If they lost it, he didn't think that CPS would provide us with a new one. He didn't think that it was too much to ask for the driving service to provide the appropriate equipment to transport a child. He said that he'd also request that we be allowed to take Baby A out of state the second week of August for a family trip. On the breach of privacy over the daycare location issue, he recommended that we not mention it in court for now. His assistant had been appalled that the driving service would hand a sheet with the baby's daycare location to the bio mom. In his judgment, she hasn't shown enough initiative to suggest that she'd take action. So I said that it was fine to let it lie. He asked me if we were still contemplating adoption or whether we'd made a decision. I said that if reunification is not possible, we very much want to adopt Baby A.

Court. The judge to whom the case has been assigned was not there. Another judge heard today's case. She was legal poetry in motion. Efficient. Quick. Fair. Upholding the law. I can't get into the details, but she simply laid out what bio mom has to do in the next three months to get a continuance for more time to complete the case plan. Now that ball is in bio mom's court. Baby A's lawyer said that the baby was doing well. He also brought up the concerns over safe transportation. I'm quite sure that the caseworker wasn't expecting me to be proactive in discussing this with her lawyer. It is unfortunate that I had to have the lawyer bring up safety concerns in transportation. But we've been dealing with this transportation BS since the beginning of the case. I suspect that bio mom's lawyer was loving this. It isn't often that you have a foster parent basically say in court that CPS isn't doing its job right. It doesn't make "the state" look good. Anyway, Baby A's lawyer said that he thought that the driving service should come prepared. He didn't think that we should be providing our personal property to the state for liability reasons. But he said that I was willing to provide it if that was the only way to get the baby there safely. The judge lamented on the transportation sloppiness and thanked me for the offer but hoped that CPS would straighten this out. There is a permanency hearing set for the beginning of September. It will go back to the judge who has never heard this case (although it was technically assigned to him back in March). It is unlikely that Baby A would return to bio mom in September. Either she will make substantial effort on the case plan and get time extended or rights to Baby A will be severed.

A new CPS caseworker has been assigned to Baby A's case. She'll be taking over for the current one. I'm hoping that the current one hasn't poisoned the well. This afternoon, I was CC'd on an email where the current caseworker thanked the driving service for clarifying what had happened in the transportation mix up. The driving service was lying. They claimed to have provided car seats except when I wanted her transported in ours. LIE, LIE, LIE. He also said that it "could never happen" that a driver would take someone else's car seat. AHHH, DUDE, THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED MONDAY. And then the current caseworker thanked him for clarifying the "miscommunication" and said it was unfortunate that I brought this matter up in court. Interesting that she never reiterated to him that she had personally requested that a car seat be provided by the driving service. She told me twice that she had put it in bold letters on the transportation order. I was totally ready to move past this, but these two jerks were obviously trying to cover their backsides b/c it was brought up in court. I haven't responded yet. But as they are trying to make it seem like I made all of this stuff up or am somehow confused, a response it going to happen. Our family specialist is taking up the issue with her management b/c they were the ones who had trouble with this particular caseworker before when they blew the whistle on some of her unethical activities. I just don't want her to retaliate by making bad decisions for Baby A. I'll be relieved when the case is in someone else's hands.

Daycare. Jeff and I don't see eye to eye on the daycare situation in terms of our evaluation of Daisy. No, Daisy isn't as pretty as CLA. And yes, the rooms are smaller so the feel is slightly more chaotic b/c they have a lot of stuff crammed in a smaller space. The rooms at CLA are huge. I suspect that part of Jeff's problem in making the comparison is that he hasn't spent as much time as I have at CLA when I see the chaotic nature of kids. I was the one after all who watched Henry get attacked by that one kid. Not just hit, but attacked. I am still vexed that the kid wasn't written up for it and was left in Henry's room for several weeks. I suspect that Jeff thinks that daycares should always look like Miss R's classroom. Miss Lulu and Miss Diana have an usual gift with toddlers. Their classroom is always in order. Maybe I should investigate to see if they've secretly replaced all of the kids in their class with Stepford kids or something.

It often looks kind of chaotic in Henry's classroom...although since the male-female ratio has changed, the feel of the class is completely different. Yesterday, when I picked up Henry, I noticed that all of the boys minus Henry were sitting in the kitchenette area. The teachers aren't allowed to give kids "timeouts" but sometimes they put them near a wall and let them think for a few minutes. Henry was with the gals in the class being read a book by Miss Valerie. Henry loves his books.

I obviously can't move the kids without compliance from Jeff. It didn't help his impression of the school when we entered the 2 year classroom, which was having PE instruction, and the teacher was holding a child who had bumped his head pretty good. The lump was pronounced, and the teacher was holding a bag of ice on it. I think that Jeff was more affected by seeing that than I was. I can only imagine that parents visiting CLA weren't impressed by Henry's blood gushing chin wound when a classmate hit him with a puzzle piece on the chin.

As Jeff mentioned, the daycare director did apologize yesterday and asked what we had decided to do. I said that I planned to talk about the matter with the baby's lawyer and see what he thought we should do. She also said that if we had to move, she wouldn't require the 2 weeks notice. So that was good. But there is still the issue of Henry. He simply can't stay in a 2 year classroom forever. In reality, I am cognizant of the fact that he isn't yet 3 adjusted. However, based on his developmental evaluations, he was in the 50th percentile for a 3 year old on many skills (slightly better than that for speech) when he was about 2.5 adjusted. That suggests to me that we should move him where he will be challenged.

Assuming that Henry gets moved into a 3 year old class, one of the potty trained classes without the child with the behavior problems, I think I'll be OK with keeping the kids where they are...for now. But I do want the kids to attend the Sonoran Science Academy for kindergarten. And being enrolled in Daisy will help that happen. In other words, come next year, he and Miss R should be enrolled there.

Jeff thought that we needed to do something fun tonight with the kids to take our minds off of the CPS fiasco. We picked up Baby A first, then Miss R, and then Henry. Miss R was in a different set of clothes from the ones she wore to school. She had an accident while waiting for another kid to use the bathroom. She tried to hold it, but the other kid took a long of time, too long. Henry was excited to see us. He got to show off Baby A to some of his classmates. Interestingly, it was his female classmates who surrounded me and Baby A. They wanted to touch her hair. They were very gentle. In comparison, his friend Joaquin came over, looked at the baby, and then hightailed it to where the action was and Baby A wasn't it! I had to wonder if gender difference really are programmed into us at such young ages.

We went to Monkey Business. Everyone had a good time. We played lots of games and ate cheese crisps, mushrooms, zucchini, and onion rings. Plus, we got homemade ice cream. Miss R was most thrilled with the fruit punch and the ice cream.

Henry tried to join in a game of tag with kids who were probably in fifth grade. He doesn't seem to notice age differences. He spent quite a bit of time with the Monkey Business monkey who got Henry to mimic him in a game of monkey see, monkey do. Monkey would raise the roof, so Henry would raise the roof. Monkey would clap, so Henry would clap. Miss R was very shy and hung out with me.

At one point, Henry bonked his head (again) while climbing on the plastic hippo. He started to make a crying-ish sound. He wasn't really crying as I saw no tears. But he needed comfort and recognition of his "wounds," so I said, "Henry, come here. Let me look at it. I am afterall a doctor" and then dropped my voice to add "of philosophy." And I kissed his head. I didn't think Henry was paying attention to my voice, but he said "Thank you doctor philosophy." It was so darn funny.

I read the kids some books when we came home. Henry got into trouble for not brushing his teeth and hitting Jeff. That earned him a timeout before bed. Baby A had a little bit of a bottle, but crashed shortly after and has been in bed ever since. Miss R went to sleep, but she's called out a couple times.

Signing off from the Wild Kingdom...

The Roller Coaster

Today we had an early call from our foster care agency rep. Apparently our agency blew the whistle on our CPS case worker for baby A at some time in the past (nothing in regard to us or baby A). That might explain the poor relationship we have had with her.

We took the kids to see a new daycare we are considering moving them to. Kate and I had visited earlier in the week. It has a lot going for it. Kate was ready to fill out the paper work. I had a very negative reaction to what I saw today. It seemed very crowded last time. This time it was the noise and chaos that got to me. Kate pointed out that if the facilities were bigger, they are a rather small daycare with moderate sized rooms with lots of kids and things in them, then I probably wouldn't notice as much. That is true but they aren't so I did.

Henry made himself at home. He didn't seem to interact with the kids but he played with toys and one of the teachers showed him how to use scissors which is a scary prospect in his hands. Until he learns to treat the cats better I don't think he'll be having scissors at home any time soon.

Miss R was rather shy as we would expect. I think a transition to a new daycare would be hardest on her. She is the teachers pet in her current classroom and I think it will be a bit traumatic even moving classrooms in her own school. However, I believe I thought that last time she moved rooms and was pleasantly surprised at how well she did.

I'm not concerned about baby A. She can sleep in a bouncy seat in pretty much any daycare.

I dropped the kids off at school. They were slow but fairly cooperative. I tried to pay a bit more attention to how things compared to the other daycare we looked at. I have to say that Miss R's class is rather amazing. They tend to have a fairly good number of kids in there and often have 3 teachers in the room. Almost every time I'm there everyone is sitting quietly listening to a story. I'm wondering if they slip a little something in the sippy cups at snack time because it's almost unreal how well behaved all those kids are.

Henry's class was a bit more authentic. One child comes up and shows whoever enters the room the neat underwear he is wearing that day. He also decided to take his shoes off and throw them across the room. Another boy was trying to take something from a little girl. Repeated warning from the teacher eventually convinced him to give it up. A bit more noise, a bit more chaos. Still didn't seem nearly as bad as the other daycare we visited.

Henry went and worked on a puzzle in the middle of the room. I felt a sad feeling that he was either bored or unhappy. I want him to want to go to daycare. He loves to learn things and he is very bright and social. If he is left to his own devices he gets into trouble but when is directed for the most part he is focused and engaged. We are already planning on pushing to get him moved up to an older classroom, which he should be in. We want him to be potty trained so he can skip the room with Attila the Hun Jr which is for those still being potty trained.

I received a message from baby A's lawyers office trying to schedule a visit. It is required by the court that the lawyers visit with their clients at least once between court appearances. So of course the day before they are calling and trying to work out a last second visit so the judge doesn't rap them on the knuckles. Much like CPS it seems they have no concept that people may have other commitments that might require more than 30 minutes notice. They even considered having us bring the baby to court so that the lawyer could see her a few minutes before hand. That's quality time.

The lawyer's assistant did make it out to see us in the evening. The visit was pretty mundane until she asked, "How is your relationship with CPS?" Well, about an hour later Kate finished recounting all the guffaws regarding transport and privacy etc. The assistant said that transport is a problem for many foster families right now. My theory is that they contract the transport to the lowest bidder which happened to be a bunch of high school or elementary school drop outs who have no clue about what they are doing besides green means go and red means stop and yellow means go really fast.

The assistant is going to relay our issues to the lawyer. If the lawyer should feel that the privacy breach regarding baby A's daycare warrants relocating her to another daycare we will do so. However, I think Kate has relented on moving the kids otherwise. When she picked up the kids this afternoon the director finally apologized for the security breach which was part of what we wanted. Now if they would just adjust their policy so that they would not send the daily info sheet with CPS unless explicitly directed to that would be a true victory. Frankly I could do without the sheets all together. Just tell me what they did that day and if they ate well and napped well and when they went potty last and keep the paper. I've got enough paper at home that I don't know what to do with.

The kids ate reasonably well for dinner. Kate took baby A for a walk with the dogs. As per usual she fell asleep on the walk and then woke up as soon as Kate put her in her crib. I played with the kids in their playhouse where we did "Patty Cake" and "Duck Duck Goose". The latter is more like everyone chasing each other around the living room than anything else.

Henry has been up a few times for water. Kate slept in the rocking chair with baby A for a while. Baby A is doing something rather strange when lying down. She is arching her back and turning on her side. It almost looks like she is going to roll over from back to front. However, the arching just looks a bit strange and she's sleeping like that. It only started a day or two ago. I hope it's not anything serious.

In fun news baby A is trying to grab her toes. She gets to her knee regularly and has made some attempts at her toes. I don't know if we have an official grab yet. I'm sure it will be any day now.

I'm blogging to you from my newly configured treadmill desk. I'm walking a whopping 1mph while typing. Hoping it works out and I lose 30lbs while I work. We'll see. It probably doesn't help that I'm also drinking a glass of wine. Let's see you do that with Taibo! At least the treadmill is being used for exercise instead of as a platform for a dead printer, a cat bed and any junk we don't feel like putting in it's proper location.

Tomorrow is court for baby A and a hearing check for Miss R.

Lack of Common Sense

On Wednesday, I had an uneventful morning getting the kids into daycare. It really has struck me how easy Henry has been to get to class the last couple weeks, coinciding with the "promotion" of the kid who attacked him to the next level. It makes me sad, however, to think how Henry had unnecessarily felt threatened for several weeks when the "developmental coordinator" did not follow through on her promise to remove the offender.

Daycare. Jeff finally made contact with the "regional director" who basically parroted the director's statement on how everything is supposed to be sent home at the end of the day, but said it wasn't a policy per se but it was just what they usually did. The regional director tried to get into the particulars of Baby A's case (obviously, she hasn't been affected by their stupidity yet...but we aren't really interested in taking that chance). She couldn't seem to grasp how sending the location of the daycare to the bio parents of foster children would be a problem (but maintained they never give information over the phone) and basically said that it was CPS' problem and that they should have screened everything. In short, another idiot in child care administration. Great. Doesn't anyone in administration in the child care industry have common sense?

I spent the day at my new office, organizing files and cleaning drawers. I met up with Jeff, Henry, and Miss R at the Sunshine Swim Center for the kids' swim lesson. Miss Natalie dunked each child four times in a row. Miss R didn't cry over being dunked (let alone four times!), which is a first. She seems to be turning a corner and doing much better in the water. Henry had to sit out of the pool b/c he wouldn't stay seated on one of the steps while Miss Natalie was working with the other kids. Henry had trouble floating on his back on his own this time. Jeff says that he doesn't like putting his arms out to make it happen.

After their swim lesson, they played in the play room at the swimming place for a little bit. There was an interesting moment when a mother and her daughter walked into the playroom. They were black. Miss R seemed fascinated with them. It isn't as though she hasn't seen people of color aside from her bio family. Our side of town and her daycare are multiracial/multiethnic. But from the way she was looking at them, I was wondering if something had changed in her and she is noticing racial differences. One of my friends from grad school has a son was born in Guatamala. She told me that he picked up on skin differences between him and them by the time he was a young toddler. Interestingly, our kids have never mentioned their differing skin colors before. And, I wonder if we are now entering a new phase of "same" and "different"...at least with Miss R.

When Jeff asked the kids to go to the changing room, Miss R went with him easily. Henry did not, because he wanted to play. Miss R marched back to the play room and commanded "Hurry up, Henry!"

We had Chinese food for dinner. Miss R ate very well. Henry ate some, but it wasn't a stellar showing. I took a walk with Baby A and the dogs. She fell asleep but promptly woke up when I got home. Jeff rushed out to Best Buy, trying to get there before they closed at 9PM. That meant I had to comfort a fussy Baby A while getting The Twins' teeth brushed and ready for bed. They eventually did go to bed, but they were very chatty when I left their room. I could hear them talking and laughing. I let them do that for 10 minutes before reminding them to go to bed. That didn't stop Henry of course. I could hear him whispering "I love you, R."

Early this evening, Jeff seemed set to move the kids to a new daycare. He's cooled down, but now I'm riled up again. I think that the best thing is to make the change. Make a decision. Move on. Our plan is to drop off Baby A tomorrow and take the kids to visit Daisy. We'll see what their reaction is.

More Lunacy

A week ago, I contacted CPS to see if Miss R had a visit with her siblings scheduled. I was told no, there were no visits scheduled. Did I want to schedule one for next month? I said yes. The next visitation scheduled for July 6.

Fast forward to this afternoon. My parents were going to pick up the toddlers and take them to Barnes & Noble. My parents went to pick them up, but there was no Miss R. She'd been picked up by CPS' driving service. WTH?!?!? By the time I got back with Baby A, it was 5:20PM. I went to my home office to get CPS' contact information. By the time I was about to contact them, the driving service had pulled up with Miss R. I'm at a loss over how an organization can be so dysfunctional. Argh.

I had picked up Baby A after my massage. Miss Jennifer, Baby A's afternoon teacher, was very apologetic over what happened yesterday. Apparently, the front desk staff ordered her to send everything along on the visit, which she hadn't planned to do b/c the morning teacher Miss Stephanie had told her that we didn't want any of Baby A's belongings, bottles, or daily sheet sent on the visits. In any event, she apologized. I felt bad that she felt bad when it was really the front desk personnel's fault.

Jeff left a message with Children Learning Adventure's corporate office this afternoon. The regional director hasn't called him back. I think that our decision to move the kids is going to depend in part how the regional director responds.

When Miss R came home, she wanted to watch Mamma Mia!. She knows parts of the lyrics to several songs. She is so cute when she sings Money, Money, Money or Honey, Honey.

My parents dropped off Henry around 7:30PM. They had bought him a Toy Story book with CD. After they left, I took Baby A on a dog walk. Henry, Miss R, and Jeff stayed home and listened to the CD of the Toy Story book three times.

Miss R was cute feeding her baby doll Eve a bottle as I fed Baby A a bottle. She did, however, get into trouble with Daddy when she refused to brush her teeth. Henry didn't want to go to bed, but that's not exactly new.

We are hoping that tomorrow is a CPS-free day. Crossing our fingers that they don't mysteriously abscond with one of our children.

The Apathetic Director

On Tuesday morning, I woke up at 3:30AM to fed Baby A. She'd had a bottle a couple hours earlier (Jeff gave it to her). Guess she isn't ready to sleep through the night. I fell asleep with her in my arms up on my shoulder. I put her back in her crib around 5:35AM. She then got up again around 6AM (Jeff took care of her). When I woke up around 7:15AM, I found Jeff holding Baby A on one side and Henry looking lovingly at Baby A on the other. The three of them were very cute together.

Miss R was a snoozy bear and didn't get up until after 8AM...with some prodding from Jeff. After breakfast, the toddlers took a shower. Miss R is doing much better getting her hair wet willingly, so that was great.

Jeff went with me to the daycare. The dropoff with the kids was fine. One of the teachers from Baby A's room said something about the CPS driver taking the wrong car seat (which is admittedly idiotic). But I pointed out that it was disturbing that the front desk personnel were so disorganized that they let people walk off with other people's property.

We met with the director. Jeff told her our concerns. She was not apologetic. She said, "We didn't know." I said, "You are never supposed to reveal private information to anyone but the foster parents." She just said, "Our policy is to send reports home." Idiot. She said that they never give private information over the phone. But the [fill-in-the-blanks] are willing to send along private information on CPS visits. Jeff is going to call their corporate office. He thinks that the director is just kind of clueless. It took us several weeks to figure out that she was the new director when the old one left. She conveys no sense of leadership, that's for sure.

At this point, even if CPS says that bio mom probably isn't a safety issue, I'm so irked at the daycare's lack of organization and unwillingness to accept responsiblity (how about an apology?) that we very well may find other accommodations.

We began our search today by stopping by one of the places that we had visited in our initial daycare search. The advantage of this particular daycare is that they are a feeder daycare into one of the top charter schools in the state. There are a couple disadvantages: (a) the facility isn't quite as nice as Children's Learning Adventure, and (b) Miss R really likes her teacher Miss Diana. One of the reasons why we discounted the daycare last year was because the play yard was...sad. It was basically an open yard of dirt with a couple plastic slides. We were very pleased to find that since last year, they have made vast improvements with the yard. The yard is now covered with grass. They have planted several trees around the yard (a lot of citrus). And, they have a garden that currently contains many sunflowers.

There is only one class per level. Consequently, Henry and Miss R would be in the same class most of the time. This was a particular concern when it was unclear what was going to happen with Miss R. Had she left us, we thought it would have been especially devasting for Henry if he had spent all of his time with her at school and home. Now that she will be with us forever, that concern doesn't exist. I confess that in a more ideal setting, we'd still like them to be in separate classes so that they have the opportunity to develop their own identities independent of each other.

The curriculum. At CLA, they do a good job pretending like they spend a lot of time doing "curriculum development" and their promotional material claims that their curriculm utilizes research on brain development (blah, blah, blah). Given who they have currently in charge of "curriculum development" at the moment (the one who lies and can think her way out of a wet paper sack), I pretty much think that their whole "brain development" based on research is probably a load of horse poop. I suspect that the "curriculum" is no better or worse than your average daycare. They claim to teach Spanish and sign language. We have yet to hear or see either out of our kids, except that Henry definitely knows how to count in Spanish (probably has to do with his time in Miss Diana and Miss Lulu's class, who are both native Spanish speakers).

At Daisy (the new daycare we are considering), counting to 20 is on their list of things expected out of kids in the 2-3 year old room before they move to the 3 year old room. I don't think that we've ever gone past 10 with the kids, so that would be new. And Henry would have to be completely potty trained before moving to the 3 year old room. The other things on the list were things like colors and shapes, which Henry definitely knows, and Miss R somewhat knows. In addition to Spanish and sign language, Daisy also teaches the kids Turkish. Why Turkish? Because the director of the charter school and daycare is from Turkey. The local paper did a piece on the charter school a couple months ago and basically implied that the director is using the school (and others like it) as a funnel for bringing Turkish citizens into the country. I haven't researched the situation enough to take a position on it, but in terms of educational standards, it does seem like the school so far as done well in teaching math and science in the K-12 school (winning awards and whatnot). I believe that all students in the K-12 are required to take a couple years of Turkish and/or Turkish culture. Going to Daisy would secure a spot at the K-12.

We probably won't make a decision today, but we'll be thinking long and hard over the next couple days. I'm still mad, mad, mad. I've been unhappy since being lied to by the "development coordinator" when she promised that the child who attacked Henry several weeks ago would be moved and then she didn't do it for nearly two months (see April 15 post entitled "Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!"). During April and May, Henry did not want to go to school. And funny thing, since they switched the "older kids" (minus Henry) to the older classrooms, Henry hasn't complained about going to school. Sure, the boys in the class sometimes hit each other (some more than others), but he doesn't have to worry about being "attacked."

Alright. I have litter pans to wash today and papers to organize. In happy news, I have a massage scheduled for 3PM and it is very much needed!