The Zoo, A Party, A Swing, and Air Hockey

On Sunday morning, we had breakfast at home so that we could get to the zoo while it wasn't quite so hot. We made it to the zoo, it wasn't hot temperature-wise, but it was humid. Yuck! We made it to the giraffe's pen in time for feeding. Henry did well feeding them. Miss R was timid this time for some reason. The kids had fun. Henry ran around like a wild man. Miss R loved watching the polar bears swim.

The big hit of the excursion was playing with a frog statue that spat out water when a button was pushed. They must have played with that for at least 10 minutes. Miss R also liked the baboons, who scared her last time but she liked them this time.







We went home. Took a nap. The kids had a late lunch. And then we got ready for Uncle Brian's birthday party. Miss R was fascinated by the dogs who were in the backyard at Erin and Brian's. Henry and Miss R enjoyed the steps up to the second floor. They could have easily spent the entire time on them. Henry also enjoyed playing with Aunt Erin's hungry, hungry hippos game. They made friends with at 1.5 year old named Sarah. We went over to the park next to Erin and Brian's house. There were two swings, the traditional kind with only a seat, no sides. Both Henry and Miss R took turns on it. I was impressed that Henry liked it. He hasn't liked swings that much in the past, but maybe he liked that he wasn't harnessed into this one.








Erin and Brian have a nice air hockey table. We put the kids on chairs at each end and taught them to hit the pucks to the other side. Miss R in particular got the hang of it. Once the kids learned that if the pucks went into the goals, they would travel down to pockets on the side of the table, they stopped hitting the pucks so much and started scoring on themselves so that they could retrieve the pucks from the slots. I'm not sure why that was so much fun, but it kept them entertained for awhile.

When we came home, Miss R was asleep. Henry stayed up and read books. As we put Henry to bed, Miss R screamed bloody murder. She refused to communicate what the problem was. Screamed and screamed. I ended up holding her for two hours on my lap while she slept. Every time I tried to get her off me, she was screaming bloody murder all over again. I'm not sure what gives.

This morning, I dropped of the kids. Miss R cried as I left her with Josie. Henry held onto me as I attempted to drop him off in his classroom. Miss Lulu was busy changing someone's diaper. I played with Henry in one of the centers. I got out two Fisher Price airplanes. Pretty soon, I had all of the kids (5 of them) minus the one being changed around me. I talked about the airplanes. Where was the pilot? Is this a passenger? Where do you think that this gal belongs? Can the truck take the passenger to the plane? The kids seemed to be hanging on my every word (much different from the college students that I teach). It was fun. I managed to slip out while Henry continued playing with his friends. By that time, Miss Lulu had come to the table where the kids were.

The Henry Alert

On Friday, Grammy and Poppy picked up Henry and Miss R. Henry's teachers told them that they had a bit of a scare with Henry. As the kids were rounded up on the playground during their water activities as it was "water day," Henry was missing. They had to sound a missing child alert and look around the school top to bottom to find him. Apparently, he had climbed onto the big kids playground equipment without them noticing and was laying down on a high platform, not easily seen. Other than that, both Henry and Miss R had good days. They ate all of their meals. Miss R enjoyed watching the water but didn't want to get wet.

On Saturday morning, Miss R was the first person up. That's a first. She got up at 6:30AM or so. I made the kids pancakes...very good ones if I do say so myself. We gave them a bath because Miss R's hair had been in braids. The braids were looking unkempt, so they had to come out. It just works out better if I condition her hair after the braid come out. While in the bath tub, I asked Henry about school and what he did yesterday. He talked about Miss Lulu and Miss Stephanie.

After his bath, he announced that he wanted to go shopping.

HENRY: Shopping.
KATE: You want to go shopping?
HENRY: Uh-huh.
KATE: What do you want to buy?
HENRY: New toys.
KATE: Well, we'll have to do that later. Today, we're going to the mountain.

As we packed the kids and Roger into the car, Jeff was holding a Trader Joe's bag of supplies. When Henry saw the bag which had "Trader Joe's" on it, he said the name. Again, this raises the question of whether or not he can read. We've only taken Henry there a couple times. And every time that I'm the one taking him there, I've forgotten the reusable bags (so that doesn't explain why he could clearly identify the bags).

We went to Grammy and Poppy's house to meet up with Aunt Carolyn and Aunt Erin. We caravaned up to Rose Canyon. The Twins were super loud and crazy in the car until we put in a lullaby CD. Then all was quiet. We may have to run it through a permanent loop in our home speaker system!

Rose Canyon was packed, but we walked around the lake. Henry got compliments on his eye lashes and monkey backpack/leash. Miss R insisted that I carry her most of the way, but then she had an inspired independent streak. She walked whichever direction she chose (ususally the opposite of where I wanted her to go) and if I tried to persuade her to head another way, I received a resounding "No!" response.








We headed up the mountain a couple more miles to some picnic spots after we walked around the lake at Rose Canyon. Rose Canyon was too packed to attempt to find an open grill. We found a nice spot near Loma Linda. We were all hungry by this point. Jeff got the grill started, and Carolyn grilled veggie hot dogs and Boca burgers. I brought vegan potato salad, which I made; Miss R liked it a lot. The kids had lots of dried strawberries. Henry enjoyed swinging from a branch of a tree near Erin. Miss R liked walking up and down hills and looking at pine needles.









On the way back down the mountain, Henry, Miss R, and I took short naps. When we got back home, the kids were again full of energy. They had a decent sized dinner. Henry really wanted pureed green beans from the cupboard. Not only did he eat all of his portion, but he also did an excellent job with his spoon. Miss R made a huge mess. We played in the playroom (formerly known as the dining room). We went for a walk around dusk and ran into our neighbors. When we returned home, we gave the kids another bath. Henry and Miss R had dirt on their bodies and faces. We read in the living room. Then, the kids went to bed. A very full day.

Tomorrow, we are probably going to Joel's for breakfast and to the zoo (which was a Henry request). In the late afternoon, we'll head over to Brian and Erin's for Brian's birthday bash.

Not So Bad Start to the Day

Jeff met my mom and Carolyn at the daycare center yesterday afternoon. He showed them to Miss R's classroom. Her class was on the playground, so he took them outside. When Miss R saw Aunt Carolyn, she opened up her arms and ran over to her.

Jeff showed them to Henry's classroom but didn't go inside. He figured that if Henry saw him, he'd want to come home with him. Jeff drove the car to the Circle K parking lot across the street so that he could observe how Henry was. Grammy reported that when Henry saw her, he smiled. He said, "Go home to Grammy's house." In the parking lot, Henry broke free from Grammy and ran around the car. Jeff called her on the cell phone to tell her Henry's location. Henry is a quick one. Grammy and Carolyn thought that Children's Learning Adventure was really neat. Grammy told Jeff that she almost felt guilty at the places that she sent us to daycare having seen how nice Henry and Miss R's daycare is.

Henry ate a lot for Grammy. Tons of potatoes. Some pancake. Rejected the fruit. When Jeff went to pick up the kids, Henry was outside of the pool gates upset that he wasn't allowed in the pool area. Grammy and Poppy were fishing out rocks from the pool that Henry had thrown.

When the kids got home, we decided to do some reading. Miss R really likes Thomas the Tank Engine. And I've noticed that she likes playing with trains. It is nice to see her play with a variety of tools (she likes her doll too). Henry is pretty much "all boy" when it comes to toys. However, he did feed Miss R's doll a bottle the other day. He also fed his penguin Rob the bottle too.



I slept in until 5:44AM this morning. Got out of bed and walked Roger. Fixed the kids their morning bottles and woke everyone up. Jeff got the kids fed (or at least put food in front of them which they often reject). It took us awhile to get the kids out of the house. Today is "water day" at school. The kids needed bathing suits and sunblock plus extra changes of clothes and towels. We put Miss R in Henry's Wall-E crocs. Those are the shoes that we plan on having bronzed at some point. But for now, they'll make good water shoes for today's festivities at school.

Dropping the kids off was the best yet. I took them to Henry's classroom first. Henry said "hold you" and "Daddy...go home...Daddy." He hates it when I explain that Daddy has to work. I'm quite sure that Daddy would prefer to be spending the day with Henry than working, but alas, working is necesary. Miss Lulu took Henry from me. Miss R cried when she thought I was leaving her in that classroom. Her tears stopped when I told her to come with me. By the time we were out the door and the door had closed, I looked through the window to find that Henry no longer had tears in his eyes. I took Miss R outside to her class. She transitioned to Josie without a peep. No tears whatsoever. Jeff said that the teachers yesterday reported that she is interacting a lot more with the other kids, which is great. Josie told me today that Miss R is going down for nap without struggle, which is also great. As I entered the lobby, I looked at the monitors and found Henry's room. It looked like Henry was walking around with a toy. That makes me happy to know that he is feeling less distressed about my departure.

Today should be a great day for the kids at school. Tomorrow, my sisters are going to join Jeff, the kids, and me for a trip to Mt. Lemmon for the day. I doubt that the kids will last the whole day, but we'll at least have lunch there, walk around the lake, and look at pine cones.

Signing off.

The Good and the Bad

Yesterday, we slept in until 6:40AM. My bad. I managed to get the kids to school by 8AM. Henry cried, but either it wasn't quite as intense as before or my heart is getting numb. I still hate leaving him. I'm not so concerned about Miss R. She cries but seems to adjust before I'm 30 feet away.

I picked them up at school at 3:40PM. I got Henry first. He flashed me a big smile and said "go home." Then, we went to get Miss R. She also gave me a big smile, said "Mommy!", and ran over to give me a big hug. It looked like Henry and Miss R ate their lunches and their afternoon snacks. Not surprising for Miss R of course, but I was very pleased that Henry had finally received a check mark next to "ate all" during a meal.

We played for a little bit at home. No TV. Jeff and I even discussed whether we should actually unplug the TV and move it to the garage for the next couple years. The biggest problem is me. As a communication research, I really should be watching more television than I do. My news consumption is almost exclusively through online newspapers, but I should be watching some of it on TV. We could get a small TV for my office and have the DirecTV line moved there.

We decided to take the kids to Borders to look at books. Uncle Jim gave Henry a Borders gift card for his birthday. Miss R found an Elmo stuffed toy. She carried it with her everywhere and noticed all of the Elmo books. We bought her one. Henry found a young girl (about 8-10 years old) and followed her around. She was doing some dance moves and Henry tried to copy her. We found some good books (Sponge Bob, Lady and the Tramp, Thomas the Tank Engine). We also go Miss R a book of Disney princess stories with a projector (they've progressed since the days of the View Master). It was hard looking for books and keeping tabs of the toddlers. The hardest part was when Jeff went to buy the books and I had to watch both at once. At that point, Henry made a break for it down one of the aisles. He is fast. Miss R was upset that we didn't get her the Elmo and had to leave it at the front desk (she already had an Elmo at home). All in all, the kids had a fabulous time.

We then headed to Jason's Deli, ordered our food, and walked over to Toys R Us. Neither Jeff nor I said the word "toys" but as soon as Henry saw that we were in the Toys R Us parking lot, he looked at the sign and said "Toys!" We were actually on the hunt for big boy and big girl underpants. We think that Henry might be more inclined to accelerate his potty training if (a) he feels the joys of being free from the massive padding of the diaper, and (b) he feels the discomfort of wet cloth when he urinates in his underpants. This contention is bolstered by the fact that Henry seemed confused when he peed in his swim diaper when he got out of the pool the other day. At least we suspect that the down pour was not pool water. As soon as we saw the down pour, Henry said "Change diadie!"

Alas, they didn't have any underpants in the baby/toddler section at Toys R Us. But they did have a Thomas the Tank Engine table that fascinated Henry and Miss R for 15 minutes. They would have stayed longer and protested our leaving the building, but we wanted to pick up the food and have some dinner. Henry was very cute at the Thomas table. He put several of the engines in the shed, closed the door, and said "Good night!" Miss R had a great time at the table too. She also seems to be intrigued with the Thomas books that we have at home.

On our way home, the kids fell asleep. We rolled into the garage at 7:47PM. They were out before they could get some dinner. We put them to bed. At 8:15PM, Jeff headed out the door to go to Trader Joe's because we only had a few ounces of milk (cow's or goat's) left in the house. He also had a prescription for Miss R to refill. At 8:18PM, Miss R started crying. I changed her diaper. She still cried. I gave her water. She continued to cry. I crawled into bed next to her. She wailed. I asked her if she had to go potty. "No!," she said. Henry woke up. He started crying for Daddy. For the next hour, all hell broke loose. Two wailing kids. Henry insisted on "Daddy!" Upon being told that Daddy was at the store, he sobbed louder. I finally figured out that Miss R would quiet down only if I let her lay directly on top of me, not next to me. But that didn't solve Henry sobbing. He wanted to wander the house looking for "Daddy!" I wouldn't let him. I tried everything that I'd read in The Happiest Toddler on the Block. I repeated his request for Daddy so that he knew that I understood what he wanted. But as soon as I told him that "Daddy is at the store" or "Daddy will be here in 10 minutes" (OK, that was a white lie; I knew Jeff wouldn't be back for a 1/2 hour at the very least), then Henry would sob uncontrollably. Miss R appeared to be asleep. When I tried to move her off me to comfort Henry (not that he wanted me), she'd wail again. And she's loud. Having attempted everything that I'd read, I decided to leave them in bed and see if they would cry it out. Seven minutes later, they were just as loud as before. So I moved them to the living room. Miss R quieted down as soon as she was in my arms. But Henry was still sobbing. I asked them if they wanted to eat, Henry said "Daddy!" and Miss R said "No!" I felt like the unhappiest mother on the block. I poured the last two ounces of milk into their bottles as the water didn't seem to be doing the trick. That quieted them for a couple minutes, as long as Miss R was directly on my chest. Then the milk ran out. Henry did take a little water, and then Jeff came home.

Henry wanted Jeff. Jeff got Henry to sleep within 10 minutes. He told Henry it was time for bed, and Henry listened. Then, Jeff pried a sleeping Miss R off my chest. She cried, but she obeyed him and went to bed.

I was frazzled and exhausted. I ended up watching 1.5 Law & Order and two Cold Case episodes. That felt nice. So much for getting rid of the television.

This morning, I got Henry to school around 8:15AM. He cried but I think that he is doing slightly better. I then took Miss R to get her blood tested. That took well over an hour. Dr. Bianchi's nurses didn't send the order over to the lab, which held things up. I was a little peeved that his nurses tried to pass the buck by telling the lab technician that the parents were supposed to pick up the form, which is complete and utter B.S. Dr. Bianchi specifically asked me which lab that I'd be using. I said that I'd be using SonoroQuest. He said that he'd have the order sent there. Thanks nurses for failing to accept responsibility and wasting my time. Sigh. Miss R was very good waiting for as long as she did with me in the waiting room. She cried when the needle was put in her arm and put up a very good fight. I was the lucky one who had to restrain her. She then wanted her bottle, which I couldn't giver her, because she'd thrown it on the floor. The nipple had touched the ground. I'm not a completed germophobe but I wasn't going to give her a nipple that had touched the ground in a medical facility (germ central!). Yuck! I returned her to school around 9:30AM. Her class was about to go outside. She cried when I left her but it wasn't as mournful a wail as some of her cries are. I peaked in on Henry. He wasn't crying. That was good.

And now, I'm working at home. My mom is going to pick up the kids today at daycare. I'm going to work this afternoon until 5:30PM. Jeff is going to go mattress shopping around 4PM.

Hopefully, the rest of today will be uneventful. I like uneventful. Boring is A-OK with me.

"Wake Up, R! Wake Up, R! R! R! R! Wake Up, R!"

Miss R had a visitation with bio parents today. The driving service refused to take Miss R's bag with her when she was picked up at daycare. We were originally told by the caseworker not to send anything b/c the bio parents are supposed to bring the things that the children would need during visits as a demonstration of their parenting skills. I sent the bag along b/c some visitations have been skipped by bio parents, and I didn't want Miss R to go hungry. When I talked with the person supervising the visit, she said, "We were surprised that she didn't have a bag and went hungry" as though it was our fault that Miss R didn't have a bag with her. I was irked: (1) we weren't supposed to be responsible for the bag in the first place, and (2) I had one ready but "their" driver refused to take it b/c he didn't want to be responsible for its transport. The situation is maddening. One the upside, I know that Miss R's caseworker is trying to sort through this bureaucratic craziness. She is going to talk with the driving service so that they take the bag next time.

When she came home, Miss R and I played in the living room and then laid down on the bed but didn't take a nap. She was dropped off at 1:50PM. Shortly after 2:30PM, Jeff took her to pick up Henry and then went to Grammy's house. The visit at Grammy's house was short. Henry wanted to "go home." Jeff said that both Erin and Carolyn were there, and Miss R was very fond of both of them.

In the car on the way home, Miss R fell asleep. Jeff said that Henry didn't want her to sleep. Upon seeing her sleep in the car seat, he said, "Wake up, R! Wake up, R! R! R! R! Wake up, R!" Miss R ignored him.

When they got home, we played in the living room. I tackled Henry. Miss R tackled me. They like rough housing. We watched the last third of The Sword and the Stone. We hadn't made it all the way through the movie yet, and I was tired of the first third. The last third is my favorite. It contains the famous dual between Merlin and Mad Madam Mim. Henry liked it when she turned into the dragon. During dinner, we also watched Sleeping Beauty, which I bought the other day. A nice thing about the old Disney films is that they are short. Henry also like the dragon scene in Sleeping Beauty. He wanted, but was not granted, the remote to see the dragon scene "again."

Around 7:15PM, we went for our walk. Miss R had some snot on her face. She tried to get it with her finger and I said, "Don't eat the boogie." So Henry repeated "Eat the boogie!" Amazing how he never hears the "don't" part of my sentences. It was dusk. We ran into Hal and his dogs Luke & Annie and two other neighbors with their dog Singhy. Miss R likes the dogs, although when all three gathered around her, she decided that it was safer to be in my arms. We didn't go the full length of our street. The sun was behind the Tucson Mountains, and we heard a rattling from somewhere ahead of us, caused by Roger getting to close to a snake. So we turned around and headed home.

I put on the book-on-CD of Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets for background. That prevented Henry asking for the TV. Both kids wanted their bottles. We started our effort to get them into bed some time after 8:15PM, but I don't think that they actually went to sleep until 9PM. They were both very tired.

I fell asleep next to Miss R but got up after being kicked several many times. I'm going to try to make my way to bed again, hopefully without getting a foot in the stomach. I can't wait for us working on the transition of them to their own beds. That will be so nice.

What Happened to the Living Room?

I had a lot of work to do Monday, so I got up at 1AM to start my day. I got a lot done while the house was quiet. I've been taking Roger for his walk at 5:15AM. That's been nice. An excellent way to start the day.

We got the kids up at 6AM, so that we could leave in time to get Henry to the playground to start his day. The hope was that he'd be so excited about the slides that he wouldn't miss my departure so much. It didn't work. Henry cried. Then Miss R cried. And that made me sad.

I went to my school. Got a lot done. Then I picked up the kids at 3:30PM. Henry was playing with play dough when I arrived. He gave me a hug and said "go home." We then went to Miss R's room. She was happy to see me and gave me a big hug too.

We got home. Played in the living room. By 5PM, I was dead tired. I went to lay down. That turned into a 3 hour nap. In my absence, Jeff took the kids for a walk. Miss R let Swanee hold her hand a good part of the way. That made our neighbor happy. We have very nice neighbors.

When I got up from my nap, it looked like a hurricane had taken place in my absence. There were alphabet flashcards (which we really haven't used yet) strewn all over the place. Books were everywhere. The place was a disaster.

The kids were taking their bath. We watched some of The Sword and the Stone before bed. I did Miss R's hair. It looked good, although it would have looked better if she hadn't moved so much while I was doing it. She wanted me to lay with her as she fell asleep. I ended up falling asleep. I guess that was around 9PM or so.

This morning, I got up at 5:30AM and took Roger for his walk. We didn't get the kids up until 6:15AM or so. Henry was hard to corral in the kitchen for breakfast. He was in the front hall doing what looked like yoga. Jeff had cleaned up the hurricane. I asked him if he knew if all the flashcards were still there. He looked at me, paused, and said, "Yes." I'm quite sure that my husband did not count them and just gave me a "yes" answer to satisfy my query. I said, "The place looked like a disaster last night." His response, "It did. But we had fun, and I cleaned it up." Fair enough.

I got the kids to school by 7:45AM. Henry's class was still on the playground. That was good. Henry cried. I'm trying not to feel his pain so much. It's hard. Then, I dropped Miss R off with Josie. Today is a bio parent visitation day. By now, CPS should have picked up Miss R at Children's Learning Adventure. They'll drop her off at home when it is over. I'm working from home today so that I'll be here when she returns.

Happy Father's Day!

I bought Henry and Miss R a neat puzzle yesterday. It contains various kinds of locks that one has to open to get to the pictures behind the locks. I pulled it out this morning. Both kids liked the toy. Jeff liked it too.

This morning, Jeff took the kids to Costco and met up with Grammy and Poppy. Grammy and Poppy took the kids in their cart. Poppy took them through the refrigerated veggie/fruit room five times b/c Henry requested "Cold, again, again!" The kids enjoyed the samples of bread and stuff.

Jeff took care of the kids while I edited chapters for the book. Deadline for the first draft is August 15, so we are trying to pull together the first seven or eight chapters by the end of the week. I'm supposed to complete my part by tomorrow morning for those sections.

The living room is a disaster area. At one point, I came out and realized that Miss R really needed to have her nose wiped. Before I could find the box, Henry found the Kleenex. He got a tissue that he was using to blow his own nose. That's a new development! And a very nice one, I might add. Miss R used my shirt as her Kleenex before I got a tissue in my hand.

Around 1:15PM, we were in the living room with the kids. Jeff was watching the U.S. Open, but Henry wanted to watch Lady and the Tramp or Monsters, Inc. He was annoyed that we were not responding to his requests. So he took a book from Miss R (one of his Thomas books) and claimed that he wanted to take it to Grammy's house right then and there. "Book to Grammy's house." I somehow think that the book taking to Grammy's house was just a ploy to get to a location where he'd be allowed to watch television, more specifically whichever Disney movie he wanted to watch.

I tried with limited success to get Miss R and Henry to color the cards for Poppy and Jeff. Miss R had the best motivation and focus for coloring but she didn't seem to push down on the crayons hard enough to get much result. Henry knows how to make color but was more interested in hording the crayons and putting them on the other side of the room from me and Miss R. Getting toddlers to do a simply and fun task is sometimes akin to herding cats.

Around 5PM, we were getting ready to leave for Grammy and Poppy's house. Henry was in my office. He looked on the floor and found the case for my Mamma Mia! DVD. He looked at it and picked it up, saying "Mamma Mia!" He's only seen a clip of it once before, that was several weeks ago when I returned from Florida. He has listened to the CD a couple times before. He likes the "Honey, Honey" song. Anyway, this is further support that the child knows how to read...when he wants to.

We went swimming. As Jeff skimmed the pool, Henry found bird poo to pick up and throw into the pool with his bare hands. Lovely. Henry didn't want to stay in the pool long. The big fish of the pool this evening was Miss R. She did extremely well. She floated on her back for me and did an excellent job kicking.

Aunt Erin and Uncle Brian arrived when we were getting out of the pool. The TV was off in the family room. Grammy told Henry that he wasn't allowed to watch it until after dinner. Henry grabbed the remote and showed it to Aunt Erin and Uncle Brian and said "DirecTV" as he pointed to the word "DirecTV" on the remote.

Henry and Miss R ate during dinner and were relatively quiet...for them anyway. After dinner, Henry listened to the "Honey, Honey" song on the Mamma Mia! DVD a couple times. Then, he wanted "Aladdin!" He fell asleep in Jeff's arms about 10 minutes into the movie. Miss R fell asleep in mine.

Jeff and Poppy opened their cards while the kids were asleep. Everyone appreciated all that the Dads in the family have done for them.

We didn't leave my parents' house until 10:15PM, but it felt more like 2:15AM to us. I guess that's a sign that we are getting old. It doesn't seem like that long ago when 9PM was a starting time for many get-togethers with friends when we were in Philly. On that tired note, I'm signing off to do some editing before bed.

Daycare: Day 3

Dropping Henry and Miss R off at daycare was hard. Miss R protested being transferred to Josie, but I suspect that she settled down quickly. Henry was another matter. He was very upset about me leaving. I felt like I was abandoning him. I hate seeing his confidence shaken. Up to this point in his life, he's always been a very confident kid.

We both had productive work days w/o the kids around. I was tired b/c I hadn't slept the night before and had worked through the night, but I managed to get a lot done. I went with Jeff to pick up the kids. The kids in the class were around the tables, getting ready for a project. Henry was off on his own, reading a book. When we came into the room, he didn't look up. He was focused on the book. I kneeled beside him, and he still didn't look up, so I called his name. He looked at me but returned to the book. A couple pages later, he got up and gave me a hug. Miss Stephanie was away on vacation, so Miss Sara (?) was in the room. She is a floater and said that she gives other teachers relief for their breaks, and she'll be filling in for Miss Stephanie next week. She said that Henry was fine in the afternoon, but he cried a lot in the morning...just as he had the other days. That was a bit frustrating to hear b/c I was under the impression that he hadn't cried that long the other days.

We picked up Miss R who was on the playground. Miss Kristen said that she had a great day. She continues to eat all of the food given to her. She was very happy on Friday.

Our plan was to drop the kids off at my parents' house for awhile b/c my parents hadn't seen the kids in a couple of days. When we got there, Henry wanted to "go home." I think that he wanted to make sure that his home base was still intact. So we left after a couple minutes.

When we got home, Henry was demanding. He requested various DVDs. I acquiesced until DVD change request number five. I'm not sure that he really wanted to watch TV. He may have wanted just to boss me around. He tired out earlier than Miss R who wanted me to hold her while I read. Jeff went to the back with Henry.

On Saturday, we played with the kids and made them pancakes. I tried to get the kids involved in the pancake making by having them throw blueberries into the batter, after washing their hands of course. We went to the park. Henry climbed a tall climbing wall that was on the big kids' equipment. Jeff stood behind him, but Henry managed to climb all the way up himself. We played chase in the grassy area. Henry made friends with some older gals again. He followed this one girl (10 years old) around the park. Luckily, she found him cute rather than annoying. I think that Henry would be happiest in a classroom of 4-6the graders at an all-girls school. He has a knack for tracking them down at parks. We watched the kids at the skate park. There's a neat area for the bikers/skaters to do their tricks. The only thing bad about it is that they tend to use the f-word a lot (being junior high age boys).

We came home. Roger has been sick. Back end issues. So, I corralled the kids into the bedroom while Jeff broke out the Spot-Bot. Henry started off pretending that he was "sleeping" on the floor, but it turned into actual sleeping. He slept there for about a 1/2 hour. Miss R fell asleep on the bed. I got ready to go to a friend's baby shower; she lives in my parents' neighborhood.

Jeff played with the kids when they got up. He met me at my parents' house around 3:15PM. We spent some time together in the afternoon. Then, I did some shopping while Jeff got the kids. Henry was sacked out by the time he got home; Miss R played with me in the living room.

At 5:30AM, Henry called out for me. That's rare. He just wanted to know where I was. He calmed down, and I got up to take Roger for a walk. It is 7:50AM now. Henry's been up since I got back from the walk. Miss R is still asleep. I'm going to go make breakfast.

Daycare: Day 2

On Thursday, we tried to get the kids up at 6:30AM. When Jeff got out of bed, Henry did not wake up, which is very rare. Usually, Henry just pops up if Jeff isn't there. Miss R wasn't grumpy when she got up, although she was poky, because Princess was in our bed. When she sees Princess and gets to pet her first thing in the morning, it makes her happy. We made it out the door a few minutes after 7:30AM.

I managed to get the kids into the building all by myself at 7:57AM. I got Miss R out of the car first, minimizing the chances of Henry running into the parking lot by himself. There was a lady at the sign-in desk whom I didn't recognize but she recognized the kids. Surprising given that there are several classrooms running. All staff members, however, seem to have made an effort to get to know Henry and Miss R, or at least recognize them by sight.

As we approached the fish tank, Henry's class was coming inside from the playground. I decided, however, to drop off Miss R first. Her class was had just arrived on the playground. Miss Josie signed in Miss R. She said that she was very impressed with Miss R's first day. Miss R cried when I turned her over to Miss Josie, but I think that she recovered quickly. I asked Josie if I could take Henry on a slide before going to class. She said sure. I headed with him to a deserted area of the playground, near on open area with the misters that several kids, about four years old, were occupying. As I let Henry get on the slide, two sets of little four year olds came over and told me that Henry was too young to play in their area and that two kids his size had broken their arms on their equipment. It was weird being admonished by four year olds. I told them that Henry was just going on one slide and had gotten permission from a teacher because I was monitoring him. I don't think that they approved though.

Once Henry had done the slide, I took him inside to his class. He didn't want to go into the room. He said "go home." He wasn't happy. He wanted to "hold you." So I did. Two of his classmates struck up conversations with me while I held him. After several minutes, he didn't seem to be calming down. He wanted "Daddy." I felt like I was perhaps prolonging the tension, so at 8:25AM, I said goodbye and told him that we'd pick him up in a couple hours. I hate seeing him upset. As I left, I tried to see what he was doing on the monitors, but I couldn't get a good view of him.

Although Jeff will be the good "pick up" parent in the afternoon, I wanted to see Henry and Miss R and make sure they were doing well, so I went with Jeff to get them around 3:15PM. We picked up Henry first. As we peered into the window of his room, the kids were sitting around Miss Stephanie, listening to her read. Despite the fact that Henry is definitely one of the younger kids (if not youngest given the whole preemie thing) in the class, he clearly had the best attention span (tied with one other little person) when it came to listening to the teacher read. He was following along; his head wasn't looking around. Excellent focus. No fidgeting. One worry about Henry's extremely early birth is that it makes him much more likely to be an ADHD candidate. In fact, I remember laying in the recovery room after my c-section and being visited by Dr. Cahan, the neonatalogist, who was standing on my left. She was giving me the update on Henry's status. I hadn't seen him yet and wouldn't for another couple hours. I asked about risks. She was kind but frank and said that he would in all likelihood have some sort of disability, ADHD at the least. I wish that the complications of prematurity got left behind in the NICU when a preemie is walked out the door. But it is simply too early in his development to declare him free of any "effects of prematurity." This isn't me being an overanxious mom. It is a fact of preemie development, specifically micropreemie development. That said, it is encouraging that Henry's concentration is excellent (an observation made by Cuyler at his last OT evaluation a couple months ago). He is an activie and "spirited" child, but he doesn't display some of the nervous fidgeting that is common in ADHD children. And although his concentration and focus are high, he can be redirected toward other activities, easing a whole other set of concerns about autism spectrum disorders (25% of very low birth weight children end up being diagnosed with these disorders early in life). In short, Henry looks fabulous. We're happy.

When Henry saw us through the window, he began to tear up. I came through the door. He ran to me and gave me a big hug. Then, he wanted "Daddy." Miss Diana said that Henry is doing well. It is always an adjustment, especially for those kids who have never been in daycare before. He "ate some" of his lunch and snacks. She said that when she arrived, he was getting up from nap. He cried a little when he got up. He pointed at the wall at the dog and said something and then "champ." She asked if we had a dog named "Champ." Jeff figured out that Henry was probably saying "Lady and the Tramp." The dog looks like a brown version of the "Tramp."

We then picked up Miss R. Her class had just gone outside to play with the water table. They had just finished snack, but Miss Josie and Miss Kristen let Miss R bring her saltine with her. She is a slow but strong eater for them too. When she saw me, she handed me her partially eaten cracker and then gave me a big hug. She had a good day. Yesterday, she observed but didn't play much. Today, she played. She particularly like playing with the dolls and kitchen set.

We looked at the fish tank on our way to the car. Miss R can say "fish," we learned yesterday. Henry was anxious for his bottle when we got to the car. When we got home, we let the kids watch some of The Jungle Book to help Henry in particular unwind. We've decided to change our routine so that no television is watched right before bed. I read some abstracts that suggested that television viewing before bed increases the chances of troubled sleeping (in adults as well as children).

Alison, our family specialist from A Place To Call Home, arrived about a half-hour after we got home. And then, Carmen, Miss R's CPS case worker, arrived. She had a copy of Miss R's medical records. The law says that Miss R's case is supposed to be decided within 6 months of removal from the home. CPS may try to extend that a year b/c there are older siblings and it would be more convenient for them to be on the same schedule. Of course, the law was created b/c attachment is particularly crucial to young children, and dragging out cases for lengthy periods of time isn't advantageous to the infant/toddler development. It simply isn't. I don't quite understand why they'd try to put the kids on the same schedule when the siblings involved will almost "age out" of the situation by the time a year is up. At least one will be 18. The other will be close. Given some extending sibling circumstances, they'd probably be monitored by the system after 18, but 18 marks a whole different set of legal rights for them. Alison said that she'd be surprised if the courts went against the 6 month law given that progress hasn't been made by the bio family who have opted not to use some CPS services offered to them. If a family is making progress, then the courts tend to be more lenient. It's complicated.

It turns out that the permanency hearing for Miss R won't take place until September but there is a progress hearing in August. It is likely that one of the siblings who will be 18 in a couple months will be allowed to live with a friend/relative (it is unclear whether the person is really a relative) who lives near the parents. At this time, Carmen didn't think that CPS had the discretion from the court to place Miss R with that person as well, meaning that the court wants Miss R to remain here for the time being.

Carmen observed how happy Miss R is. Again, I think that she is surprised at how well and quickly Miss R adjusted to our household. She said that she is a different child when she is at parental visits at the CPS office. She also observed how well Henry and Miss R interact with each other. She wanted to see the bedroom. So we showed her around. Henry and Miss R played with each other behind the curtains in the bedroom as they like to do. Before Carmen arrived, Miss R gave Henry a big hug in front of Alison. She also petted Henry's head several times. That was new.

After Carmen and Alison left, I went through the medical records. I did find something of concern that appears to not have been followed up on, as recommended in the records. Unless of course the records are incomplete. I'm suspect that it is something that has been ignored. I'm going to call Dr. Bianchi's office in the morning, let them know that we have the medical records, and see if he wants to see her and simply order a test that I think should be conducted.

I took Roger for a walk while Jeff cooked dinner and fed the kids. Then, we gave the kids a bath. We read "Donald Duck and the Magic Stick" twice. I braided Miss R's hair. It isn't as good as last time because I was trying to do it quickly. But it isn't bad. And then, the kids went to bed.

A Good Start

We picked up the kids around 3PM. Suree said that the kids had had a great first day. No problems. She warned us that second days tend to be little bit harder than the first. The novelty begins to wear off, but the kids aren't yet in the comfort zone.

We went to Henry's room first. He was crying a little bit b/c he'd just gotten up from his nap and I think that he was confused about where he was. Waking up in a strange place can't be fun. His teacher Stephanie told us that he took a two hour nap, which is good. He ate "some" of the food offered to him, but he didn't eat a whole lot. He drank from the cups given to him. They weren't sure how much he drank but he didn't spill anything, like at home where he likes to turn cups over for fun. They said that he liked story time.

We then went to Miss R's room. She was eating her snack. Her teachers, Josie and Kristen, said that she only napped about 45 minutes. She was fighting it. They said that she was still up and closing her eyes at one point. She looked at the various toys in the room and watched the other kids. She didn't want to participate in the art project but maybe she'll be interested in it tomorrow.

All in all, it was a good first day. We decided to cancel our visit to Grammy and Poppy's house b/c we felt that the kids probably had enough stimulation for one day. We retreated to the comforts of our living room and let Henry watch TV. We watched The Jungle Book 2, which was a new purchase.

Miss R missed "Roger." She gave him a big hug and kiss when she got home. Her kiss was rather sloppy, and she ended up with some fur in her mouth.



Around 5:45PM, I took a nap. I worked on a project until late into the night, so I was beat. Jeff took the kids for the evening walk and ran into Hall, Swanee, and Yvonne. The kids ate some dinner for Jeff. We gave them a bath. It was one of the shorter baths in recent memory. Henry claimed that he had to go potty, but it ended up being a ploy to get out of the tub. After bath time, we read "Pinocchio" twice and then I read "Peek-A-Who?" twice to Miss R. We got the kids into bed shortly after 9PM, but they didn't truly fall asleep until 9:35PM or so. For the past couple weeks, Miss R has been getting giggly at night as she goes to sleep.

Tomorrow, we begin again. In the late afternoon, Carmen (from CPS) and Alison (from APTCH) will be doing a home visit. Carmen called Suree today, so we are all squared away on Miss R being identified as a DES child. Carmen told me that she'll be bringing some hair stuff that Miss R's mom had dropped off. She said that it isn't a problem for CPS to pick up Miss R from daycare on Tuesday but drop her off at our place after the visit. I think that this would be better for her, so that we can comfort her after her visit with her bio parents. It must be very confusing to be in foster care and have two families with whom one has contact plus CPS workers shuttling you are round. Our goal is to minimize her stress load. I appreciate that CPS is willing to accommodate my request on the drop off location.

The First Day of School

We got up this morning at 6:30AM. Not a problem getting Henry out of bed. He gets up whenever Jeff gets up. But it took 10 minutes for Jeff to get Miss R out of bed. She takes after me in the sleep department.

At 8AM, we arrived at Children's Learning Adventure for their first day of "school." Suree, the director, had us drop off Miss R with her class first. They were playing outside. Her teacher is Josie; another teacher was scheduled to arrive at 8:30AM. Miss R was hesitant, and she cried for me, but it wasn't too bad. She calmed down fairly quickly.

Then we dropped off Henry at his class room. He marched in the room and checked things out right away. He tried out several chairs. LuLu is his teacher. He showed her his shoes. He almost pushed a kid who was 4 inches taller than he and probably weighs 7 lbs more than he does. I told Henry that it was an especially bad idea to mess with those who were bigger than him. Geez. Let's just not push anyone. We went to the car to get his belongings (diapers, wipes, blanket, crib sheets). After we dropped off their supplies, we said goodbye to Henry and he said he wanted to "go home." That was sad. Another teacher named Stephanie arrived as we were leaving.



Our big boy and big girl are now at daycare. We hope they like it. Jeff and I will both be picking them up at 3PM. In the future, I get to be Ms. Drop Off, while Jeff gets to be Mr. Pick Up. I think that Jeff gets the better end of that deal.

Sick Kids

My mom graciously offered to take care of the kids Monday after the doctor's appointment and Tuesday. On Monday, Henry stepped onto the top step of the pool while in his tennis shoes. He also threw some of his garden tools and rocks into the pool.

I stopped by Barnes and Noble on my way home from the doctor's office. I bought books on toddler behavior. Jeff is currently reading a book called Raising Your Spirited Child, and I'm reading The Happiest Toddler on the Block.

The book that I'm reading categorizes toddler's personalities as "easy," "shy," or "spirited." If you go to a mall with your toddler, put them down on the ground, and turn your back, what do they do? Well, that's easy for us to answer when it comes to Henry. He makes a break for it without looking back. That places him in the "spirited" category. What would Miss R do? I'm pretty sure that she'd cry. That makes her "shy."

The author compares toddlers to cavemen. He says that the toddler mind is primitive. There's no point in trying to reason with a toddler. I'm only 50 pages into the book. The author recommends listening to your child and then repeating their requests or putting their feelings into words. For example, if Henry says, "Outside." Then, I'm supposed to say, "So you want to go outside, right?"

That's just the technique that we've been using for months, and Henry traps us every time with it. Here's how. After being told that we aren't going to watch TV, Henry will strike up a conversation in the following way.

HENRY: Hold You!
KATE: You want to hold me?
[Henry throws his arms around my neck and gives me a nice long, sweet hug. He pulls back and looks at me.]
KATE: May I kiss you?
[Henry leans his head forward so that I can give him a kiss.]
HENRY: Lady Tramp
KATE: So you want to watch Lady and the Tramp?
HENRY: OK.

Our attempts to clarify his requests end up being interpreted as us offering to him whatever he has just requested.

On Monday afternoon/early evening, Jeff went over to my parents' house and made them dinner. I stayed home working. The book that I'm working on has an August 15 deadline. I'm hoping to have most of my part done before we leave for Oregon. At least the data analysis part.

On Tuesday, I took Henry and Miss R to my parents' house. They both took naps, although Henry's nap didn't last long. Both kids are still coughing a little. They haven't had fevers since Saturday, which means they probably aren't contagious. Now that they are on the mend, Jeff is in full-blown cold mode. Hopefully, our house will have fully recovered by the end of the week...so that we can pick up some new illness to conquer.

On a side note, I don't think that I've mentioned how I discovered that Henry has a lot of book phrases memorized. Books that we haven't read in ages. Books that we read occasionally but not regularly. I noticed it with one of the Thomas the Tank Engine books the other day. I paused before any noises were to be expressed and asked Henry what happened. If the book said that the cars crashed, I'd pause before the word "crashed" and have Henry fill it in. He did it really well. Then, I paused before phrases were said, such as "Bust my buffers!" (a Thomas phrase) and Henry would fill in the phrase. I did this again a day later with The Haunted House, which he hasn't been interested in a month but when it was his favorite book, we read it several times a day. Henry filled in several words on a page.

Miss R is doing wonderfully with her vocabulary. Jeff commented that she appears to be going through a speech explosion. We are trying to capitalize on her current interest in words. She knows what hair and ears are now. She is absorbing a lot of information. She really loves our dog Roger. When she comes home, she wants to give him a hug and a kiss. She also likes "Bits," our crazy cat. I'm less keen on her hugging Bitsy b/c Bitsy is a bit of a thug. I love that cat, but she's unpredictable and likes to mix it up.

Tomorrow, the kids "may" be starting school. Hopefully, the rest of the night will be uneventful.

Croup

Last night was rough. Jeff brought the kids back home. Henry fell asleep in the car. Grammy reported that he had a coughing spell that lasted an hour. Miss R spent time with Aunt Carolyn again. She's keen on her.

Miss R was wide awake. I decided to do her hair for school the next day. I braided her hair. This is my third attempt, and it came out pretty well, if I do say so myself. It is interesting working with her hair b/c the texture is so different from my own. It took me about a 1/2 hour to do her hair. With practice, I'm sure that I could do it in under 10 minutes. She's small and only requires four rows of braids. I got her barrettes to hold the braids in place.

Miss R went to bed. But Henry was making noise. Jeff checked on them. It turned out that Miss R was kicking him purposely while he slept. Sigh. Then, either she or Henry was up every hour thereafter. Wanting a bottle. Wanting a diaper change. Wanting a hug. Wanting to be tucked in with the blanket again. Wanting another bottle. Both kids were coughing at different times (mainly Henry; Miss R's coughs were few and far between). Henry had a lot of drainage preventing him from sucking his bottle very long. At one point, I was holding him and I could feel his breathing and stuffiness by putting my lips to his head.

I got up at 6:45AM this morning, hoping that we'd be able to take Miss R to school. At 7:15AM, Jeff woke up Miss R. We attempted to feed her breakfast, but she refused to eat. Then, she coughed. She sounded like a seal barking. That ended any hope of having her start daycare today. Meanwhile, Jeff called Dr. Bianchi's office. He made an appointment for Henry at 9AM. We got the kids dressed. My mom said that she'd meet me at the pediatrician's office. Henry wanted to play with the toys in the "well" kids area. He was mad that I wouldn't let him touch the toys. Sean weighed him. He was 25 lbs 13 ozs, down 1 lbs 5 ozs from June 2. Given that he isn't eating or drinking, it isn't a huge surprise but disappointing nevertheless. I asked Dr. Bianchi about examining Miss R too. He agreed. While he checked out Henry, I went to the frontdesk to check Miss R into the system officially. She was weighed at 22 lbs. and some ounces. That's up from her first visit in April. When we got back to the exam room, Dr. Bianchi said that Henry's lungs were clear, which is a relief. Given his mottled color, I requested a pulse-ox reading. It was 99%, which is great (better than mine actually). Miss R cried throughout the examination. She didn't like the stethoscope. How Dr. Bianchi could have detected anything in her was a miracle given the racket she was making. She gets so testy when things don't go exactly her way. Toward the end of the examination, she gave a seal-like bark. Dr. Bianchi asked if that was the sound she'd been making. I said "yes." He said "Croup." He asked if Henry had been making similar sounds b/c of course Henry wasn't making the sounds now that we were in the presence of a doctor. I said "yes." He decided that the best course of action was an oral dose of steroids for both of them: decadron. He thought that they'd be better this evening. If they don't show any signs of illness tomorrow, they can start their daycare on Wednesday.

My mom volunteered to take care of the kids today while we work. She'll also be taking care of them tomorrow.

The new beds will be delivered today. So that's one good thing that's going on. We haven't bought mattresses yet though. Jeff is in charge of mattress purchases. To go green on mattresses or not to go green, that is the question. The green mattress company is in Phoenix, which means that we'd either have to trek up there is test the mattresses or take a chance.

That's all for now.

Henry is Coughing and Moody

Yesterday, Henry and Miss R went swimming. My mom reported that they got into a squabble over a toy, and Miss R pushed Henry. My mom intervened before it escalated. Henry is 5.5 inches taller than Miss R. I'm pretty sure that he'd win the battle of Baby Thunderdome, but I wouldn't rule out Miss R for a couple good hits. When she doesn't want to be messed with (e.g., a diaper change or being picked up when she doesn't want to), she'll make a hitting motion and say "StopIt!" She did punch me once in the face at Trader Joe's. It was a pretty good punch and unexpected. I can't remember what set her off. It was the second week that she was with us, I think. That's very rare behavior though from her.

I slept in the guest bedroom last night. The kids were sprawled in the bed. We didn't want to move them and risk waking them up. I believe that Jeff slept at the foot of the bed. I had a good night's sleep. Jeff...I'm not so sure. We are very much looking forward to the new bed delivery this week! Jeff changed the crib into a toddler bed for our room b/c Henry was trying to get out of it by himself, which was a recipe for a broken arm or leg. This morning, he took down the double bed in the guest bedroom to make room for the new twin beds.

Henry had several coughing jags this morning. Unless he makes a miraculous recovery this evening, he isn't going to daycare tomorrow. But Miss R seems to be doing well. She has recovered from Friday's fever and vomiting. She will most likely be going to daycare tomorrow. We want to get her into her new routine. She and Henry aren't scheduled to be in the same class, so starting them at different times is OK. I haven't decided what to do about Tuesday. That's the day Miss R usually has parental visitations. CPS does the drop off and pickup. I'm not sure that I want them to drop her back at the daycare after the visitation. They are strangers to her. So I don't know if I want strangers (CPS driver) dropping her back with strangers (new teacher). Visitations can sometimes be unsettling for kids emotionally. I'm thinking that I should be the one to comfort her after the visitation b/c she knows me. Once she gets used to her teacher, then the teacher will be able to comfort her.

Today around the house was chaos. Henry was pushing Jeff's buttons left and right. Then, he'd try to get me to comfort him when Daddy wouldn't pick him up b/c he'd done something inappropriate (e.g., throwing a bottle). I wouldn't comfort him if Daddy wasn't comforting him if the reason was Jeff trying to discipline. We aren't super strict by any stretch of the imagination, but we strongly believe that kids shouldn't be coddled when they've been told "no." That doesn't help them in the end or teach them anything. Hugging them and saying "oh baby, please don't do that" in a syrupy voice doesn't send the message not to throw the tantrum or do the inappropriate behavior.

In the late afternoon, Jeff took the kids to Grammy and Poppy's for swimming. Jeff's headed back there for dinner. My mom has made him carnitas. I'm working.

We hope that this week goes better than last week. I hope that daycare works out for the kids. I hope that Henry makes a quick recovery. I hope that the beds arrive without problem. In happy news, we got our airline reservations this afternoon. We will be visiting Oregon in July.

Sick Again But That Doesn't Stop Henry

Miss R has really taken to Aunt Carolyn. She spent a lot of time with her yesterday afternoon. She also slept quite a bit. Henry did not. I stayed home yesterday afternoon working. Jeff went over to my parents' house. He said that Henry fell on his tush purposely several times. Why is a mystery. My mom said that at one point yesterday, Miss R was crying (turned out that she wanted a bottle but wasn't communicating). Henry tried to comfort her several times. When that failed and she continued to cry, he gave her a little kick. I'm pretty sure that landed him in timeout.

When Jeff got home, he put Henry in bed. Miss R had woken up b/c of our security alarm. She and I sat on the couch for awhile. Then I put her in bed. Henry was coughing and hacking, which made me nervous given his lung history. He stirred a lot so Jeff ended up going to bed to hold him. I checked on them a couple times an hour. Around 1:30AM or so, Miss R made some noise. I went to check her b/c she was wearing a Level 3 diaper, which she wets through at night. A fresh one was put on her before she left my parents, so I didn't change it when she got home. She was in fact soaked. As I changed her, I noticed that her body felt hot to the touch. I took her temperature and it was 102.6 axillary (meaning core temp was more like 103.6). A temp that reaches 104 and doesn't come down with Tylenol means a trip to the ER. I got her some Tylenol and took off her shirt so she just had a diaper on. She cooled down shortly thereafter. I ended up checking on her regularly. Someone stirred around 3AM. I can't remember who or why, but the result was both Jeff and I being up. I held Miss R in the rocking chair where we fell asleep. Transferred her to the bed around 6AM.

Henry stirred but fell back asleep in the morning. I don't think that we got out of bed until 7:45AM or so. We played and read books in the living room. Then, we had waffles and hash browns for breakfast. The kids didn't eat much at all. We didn't push it. We gave them a bath. Played. Had a sizable snack. We got the kids down for nap around 12:30PM. They slept well. Stirrings began around 3:30PM but they lazed in the bed with fresh bottles until 4-4:15PM or so. We got them ready for a trip to Grammy and Poppy's house where they will be going swimming. Their temperatures are in check. Henry is still coughing a little. Jeff is taking them over to my parents now. I'm going to get some data analysis completed.

Not a Banner Week

On Wednesday night when Jeff and Carolyn had returned from the park with the kids, Jeff said Henry had announced that he wanted to "go home" from the park much earlier than Jeff had anticipated. In fact, I don't think that Henry has ever uttered the phrase "go home" while at the park. Jeff thought that Henry felt a little warm. He took his temp, and Henry was running a low grade fever. He was also chewing on things, suggesting that he may be teething.

On Thursday, my mom called in the morning to say that she was now better and really wanted to see the kids. She also called to say that she and my dad had decided that it was time to put Ramses (the pom pom) down, and that they had made an appointment for the following morning.

At breakfast, Henry vomited. His nanny thought that it was because he had gotten a piece of bacon caught at the back of his throat. He refused to take a nap. At lunch, she asked what I wanted to feed him. I got some chicken masala out of the refrigerator. As I was cutting it into pieces for him, he vomited again, having not had anything to eat yet. It was a lot of vomit. I took him to the bathroom and gave him a bath. Miss R was thankfully still asleep. I gave the nanny the rest of the day off. She very nicely offered to get us some supplies from the store. I thanked her but said we'd be OK. We thought that it was still possible that he was sick b/c of teething. Teething can induce fevers. And when kids salivate a lot, the excess saliva can irritate the stomach.

Henry was acting fine (other than the two episodes of vomit). Grammy still wanted to see the kids, so Jeff took them over to her house. We then picked up dinner and brought it to Grammy and Poppy's. We wanted to spend a little bit of time with Ramses before he was put down.

Ramses wasn't in a snuggling mood b/c he knew that food was around. Despite all of his problems, he continued to have a knack for finding food sources.

When we got home, we put the kids to bed. Henry was a floppy fish. We got him settled, but he cried for Daddy ten minutes later. I went into the bedroom to comfort him and fell asleep with him around 9:30PM. Around 3AM or so, Miss R woke up. She'd wet through her diaper...again. I hadn't put the overnight diaper on her b/c she had fallen asleep in the car. I'll have to bring some overnight diapers to my parents' house so that when we change them before leaving their house and the kids fall asleep in the car, there won't be a big mess. As I changed her, she felt warm to me. I took her temperature. It was 100.3 axillary, meaning that 101.3 was probably closer to the truth. Sigh. OK. So Henry may be teething but he's also sick and so is Miss R. Double sigh. A few minutes later, Miss R vomited a little bit. Not much, but some. Triple sigh. Jeff comforted Miss R. We cleaned up the mess but didn't want to strip the sheets b/c Henry was finally sound asleep on his side of the bed. Jeff managed to get Miss R to sleep in the crib. I was wide awake, so I sent an email to our friends unfortunately having to cancel our camping plans for Saturday. :(

Jeff called the nanny in the morning telling her that the kids were sick. When the kids are sick, she doesn't work so as not to get her child sick. But she said that she'd come over to get her paycheck. He also called my mom telling her about the situation. She volunteered to take care of the kids today. I took the kids there at 9:30AM. The nanny must have arrived shortly after I left. Jeff explained to her that his trip to Philly made him realize that he truly needs a quieter place to work and the situation wasn't adequate for his work needs. He gave her a nice severance check and wished her well. She was understanding about it. She is willing to babysit in the future if we need her or get together for play dates with the kids. I'm glad things ended as well as they could. Jeff called Shirley, Henry's PT, to cancel our monthly appointment; she works with fragile children, so it is especially important that we don't get her sick.

Meanwhile, I spent a little time with Ramses (aka The Ram, Ram Ram, or my favorite, Rambo). Carolyn bought Rambo some roast beef and chicken. He loved it. After Erin arrived, my dad, Carolyn, Erin, and I took Ramses to the vets' office. His usual vet was out of town, so Dr. Carolyn Lopez handled it. She did a nice job. We got to spend some time with Ramses after they put the catheter his right front leg. They also gave him a mild sedative. We petted him, kissed him, and said our goodbyes. When we were ready, Dr. Lopez came into the room with the shots. And he passed away.

All of us are sad at Ramses' passing. I'd like to say just a few words about Rambo. Ram Ram came into our lives about seven years ago. When Erin's high school friend went to college, her parents wanted to get rid of him. He was about 12 years old at the time. They were going to take him to the pound. It is unlikely that such an old dog would be adopted. It would have been a death sentence. My parents took Ramses in. At that time, nobody thought that he'd live that long b/c he was already 2 years past the average life span for a Pomeranian. Ramses and Indiana got along very well. In his "younger" years, Ramses would clean Indiana's teeth every day after they played, which was kind of gross but hilarious all the same. They were so cute together when they'd play fight b/c Indiana was so much bigger than Ramses. One of Ramses' quirks was that he'd attack anyone who would wake him up. I'm not sure that he had any teeth, but he'd make growly sounds. He was the first dog that we had where the phrase "Let sleeping dogs lie" was very appropriate. My sisters warned me about Ramses' behavior. He could be a bit strange at times. I believe that I was the only one who dared kiss him on the head. Jeff didn't understand how anyone could think Ramses would do anything inappropriate until he stayed with my parents for a few days in the summer of 2005, house shopping. That's when he encountered "The Dark Side of the Ram" one night. He never touched Ramses while he was sleeping or groggy after that. Ramses was a pest when it came to food. He spent a good deal of his time in the kitchen waiting for someone to drop something. He loved to patrol the pool area in the morning when my dad was water the plants. Ramses was 19 years old. Toward the end, he had problems breathing, had cataracts, and was showing signs of dementia. The decision to put him down was motivated to prevent him from pain and discomfort. He will be missed but not forgotten.

The Winds are Changing

In the early evening yesterday, I popped my head out of my office and was surprised to find the house quiet. Jeff and the kids had taken a nap. I walked Roger around dusk. They were still asleep when I got back. Henry and Jeff got up some time after 7PM. Around 7:15PM, I decided to get Miss R up for dinner. Henry went into the pantry and handed me a toddler meal of spaghetti that he wanted for dinner. We rarely feed them the prepackaged meals, but that's what he wanted. Of course, once it was heated up and in a bowl, he no longer wanted it. Didn't touch it at all. Miss R had her serving and then ate Henry's. Henry had maybe a bite or two of chicken. That was about it for him. We watched some of The Jungle Book after bath time. Then, it was bedtime.

This morning, Henry and Jeff got up before Miss R and I did. Jeff roused us from bed around 7:45AM. In my defense, I had stayed up until 2AM working on data analysis.

While the kids were eating breakfast, we had a "straw that broke the camel's back" incident. Nothing that we haven't experienced before, but it was clear that we need to make some changes for our own sanity. Jeff has been working out of our garage seeking some solitude. And when a certain child (not Henry or Miss R) throws her temper tantrums (which are common and without provocation), they can be heard even from outside the house. Jeff came into my office at 8:15AM and asked me if I wanted to look at day cares. I jumped at the chance.

We got ready within a 1/2 hour and were headed out the door to look at the two schools on our list that we were interested in but hadn't yet visited. The first one was The Daisy School. The major advantage of it is that children from this preschool get priority into an excellent charter school called the Sonoran Science Academy. The preschool resides in a square building. The inside is fairly institutional looking. The staff were nice. The children were well-behaved. The play yard was... sad. Dirt. A couple toy buckets and trucks. And a slide. The curriculum was fine. We then swung by Children's Learning Adventure (formerly Tutor Time). This was the school that we had seen a couple weeks ago. We liked it. We hadn't considered it high on our list before visiting b/c it is a national chain and we suspected that we'd lean toward an independent type of school. We swung by b/c when we visited a couple weeks ago, it was right after nap time. We wanted to see what a morning looked like. The kids seemed happy. The facility was impeccably clean. And the play yard is neat. They have this one area covered in astroturf with misters shooting up clouds of spray. It looked like tons of fun. We then headed to the Catalina Methodist Day School. They don't advertise b/c they don't need to. Word of mouth keeps them full. They are popular with the university community. The buildings are older, but I liked the facility nevertheless. They have a wait list. They'd probably be able to take the kids by September or October. Jeff and I went to Borders for some coffee, sat down, and figured out what to do. There is one other school that comes highly recommended. They haven't returned my call yet, but I know that there will be a waiting list.

Across all of the schools, the curriculums are appropriate and not terribly different. The locations are decent for all three schools. Catalina Methodist is near the university. Daisy and Children's Learning Adventure are relatively near our house (we live in the boonies; they are among the closest we could find). We liked that Daisy provides a way into the Sonoran Science Academy. They also mentioned how they disinfect the toys each night and wash the sheets twice a week. We liked that some of the staff at Catalina Methodist have been there over 30 years, and the director's grandson attends the toddler room. We liked that the facility at Children's Learning Adventure is beautiful inside and out. They had the best security by far of any of the schools (closed circuit cameras monitoring the classrooms, plus one has to be buzzed into the building). We liked that they have a developmental coordinator who oversees the teachers and makes sure they follow the curriculum. We liked that the kids seemed calm and happy (both times, they waved and smiled at us through the windows).

So much to our surprise, we decided that Children's Learning Adventure would be the best fit for our needs. Jeff said that the first time we visited, he could see Henry there. Henry and Miss R will be in different class rooms. We haven't mentioned anything about Henry's preemie history to the school. For now, we are going to see how he does by his birth age. We could put him in the younger class so that he would be viewed as "advanced" for his adjusted age, but we'd rather put him in a class that will challenge him a bit. Our only concern about Miss R is that she is tiny for her age when it comes to height. Her bio parents aren't tall people. We just don't want her to get trounced. I think that she'll be able to hold her own. We made our decision and headed right back to Children's Learning Adventure and signed the kids up. It is settled. They will start on Monday.

In the afternoon, I called Miss R's CPS case worker. I asked her to call Children's Learning Adventure and let them know that Miss R is with DES. That gives us a substantially reduced weekly tuition fee to pay. I also asked her if we had her approval to take Miss R to Oregon in July. She said yes! I gave her the dates. She'll bring a letter with her at her next visit. It was nice calling her and getting to talk with her right away. She also let me know that Miss R's medical records arrived from her previous pediatrician. There were no red flags in the file. I left a message at Dr. Bianchi's office requesting a copy of Miss R's immunization records to take to Children's Learning Adventure. They called back within five minutes, saying that the records are ready for pick up. What a productive day on the home front!

This means that Jeff will be able to move his office back into the house and enjoy the swamp cooling. The garage is getting too hot for him and the box fan isn't cutting it.

Aunt Carolyn came over this afternoon. She and Jeff took the kids to the park. Henry had been requesting the "park" for over an hour. In fact, he brought me my shoes as to say "Let's get going, Mom." He was indignant that Jeff and I were not moving fast to keep up with his plan for the afternoon.

Kisses, Hugs, and High Fives

Jeff has returned! He went to the CFT (child family team meeting) for Miss R this morning on his way back home from the airport. Turned out that I could have gone too. The bio parents didn't show up, so having two of us there wouldn't have been threatening or overbearing. I suspect that we'll still divide out future meetings, just in case the bio parents are there.

Henry and Miss R were happy to see Jeff. They demonstrated how they give each other kisses, hugs, and high fives. It is so cute when they give each other hugs.

I'm working this afternoon on a book chapter. Jeff is spending the afternoon playing with the kids.

Where's Jeff?

Yesterday afternoon, Aunt Carolyn came over to help with the kids. The kids showed off their ball pit skills. We went for a walk shortly before dusk. Henry was ready to dash off on his own. Miss R wanted Carolyn to hold her most of the way. I called out to Roger calling him "Rog Podge" (his nickname) and Henry called it out too. We ran into a neighbor who was calling out to her dog Misty. Henry helped out by yelling out "Misty!" He visited Outlaw and Dakota, the horses. Henry really just wanted to show off his climbing skills on the corral fence.

Carolyn went to get some Indian food for our dinner while I fed the kids. We didn't time it quite right for the kids to eat with us. Henry was demanding to eat. I started them off with fruit leather hoping that would hold them at bay. But no. They wanted more and fast. I made them waffles, which the wolfed down. I also heated some bacon and feta quiche for them. Henry liked it. Miss R refused to try it. When Carolyn arrived with the food, I cut up a piece of chicken tikki masala for Henry. He liked it. I didn't think that Miss R was hungry, but once she saw Henry eating something, she wanted it too. She loved the chicken. Then she saw that I had garlic naan, and she had several bites of that as well.

Miss R got crazy after dinner. She gave me a very hard time about changing her into some bedtime clothes. Then she got upset b/c I put her down to fix her a bottle. She was obviously tired, so I put her to bed. Henry wanted to "hold you." As we finished watching Monsters, Inc., he fell asleep in my lap. Carolyn left after the movie. I stayed on the couch for awhile holding Henry.

Jeff was supposed to come home last night. He called around 9:30PM. His flight had just arrived in Phoenix. It had sat for an hour on the ground in Philly. Philly has a totally screwed up airport. They are always late. Why they haven't improved in the 12 years that we've been using their services is a mystery. Unfortunately, being late meant that Jeff missed the last US Air flight to Tucson. He was put up at a hotel. He was supposed to take the first 8AM flight to Tucson this morning, but that flight had mechanical problems. So he was put on a 9AM flight.

He decided to get some breakfast and then head straight for the CFT. We decided last night that only one of us should attend so as not to appear as overeager foster parents, which might make the bio parents feel threatened.

I just came back from the store, having made a goat's milk run. When I got back, Henry wanted to "hold you" again. He asked about Roger. I said that Roger was outside. He said, "Podgie go potty." He is so adorable.

Toddler Tempers

Last night, I attempted to make dinner using two pans. For those of you who know me well, you know that I'm a terrible cook. Truly. I can bake poppy seed bread using my mom's "Kate-proof" recipe, but that's it ("Kate-proof" is my mom's phrase, not mine). I burn things. I have no judgment about when something is done. I even screw up macaroni and cheese from a box...I always put in too much milk making it soupy. Last night, I attempted to fry Trader Joe's fries in the fry pan while heating up Trader Joe's chicken and portabello alfredo on the skillet. The chicken actually made me nervous b/c I didn't want to undercook it for obvious reasons.

Henry was in a mood while I was trying to cook. I rushed out to the living room to give him the telephone to talk with Grammy b/c he'd been begging to talk with her. He threw a fit when I told him he had to hang up the telephone. I ended up taking the battery out of the telephone and giving it to him. He came into the kitchen with it and threw it. Not a bad throw.

Jeff's best friend Tony called. I talked with him for awhile. Henry decided to yell and grab onto the cabinet handles and rock himself back and forth. I've actually never seen him have such an extended temper tantrum. He wanted a bath but I told him that he needed to eat dinner first. Tony was very nice about the interruptions. He has four children and has probably seen it all.

I salvaged some of the fries. They didn't taste that bad. And the noodles turned out OK. Edible, but they didn't resemble alfredo from a restaurant. Henry and Miss R pretty much used the noodles to put in their hair and give to Roger. Miss R was better about eating than Henry by far.

The kids had fun taking a bubble bath. Miss R loves bubbles. I hadn't quizzed Henry about various elected and appointed officials in awhile. While asking him who was the Secretary of State, he started splashing Miss R and put bubbles in her hair. He didn't touch her hard but she didn't want his splashes. Here a clip...



Miss R has the ability to wail like nothing else. Complete with huge tears. But she can turn them off as quickly as she turns them on. Incidentally, she recovered from Henry touching her hair and enjoyed the video, which made her laugh.

Henry wants to hold Miss R's hand a lot. Over the last couple weeks, he has gone from mainly being interested in parallel play to wanting to interact with Miss R. Developmentally, Miss R is 3.5 months younger than Henry. She's still in parallel play mode and doesn't really want Henry or Karina to touch her. I suspect that things will be different in a couple months. In the meantime, I've been directing Henry to give her some space. She does interact with him on occasion, such as singing "Ah Wah Wah" in the back of the car and exchanging food during meal time. The other day, Miss R swapped Henry her crackers for his juicy fruit toddler treats. And she sometimes like to roll on top of him on the couch when they are laughing together about something. But we haven't hit the cooperative play phase yet.

Miss R fell asleep on the couch last night. It was easy transitioning her to the bed. Henry stayed up until 10:30PM. Then he was ready for bed. I concur with anyone who says that 10:30PM is kind of late for a 2 year old. As near as we can tell, Henry only wants about 8-9 hours of sleep at night...using more like 8 hours. Going to bed early simply means getting up really early. I prefer him not getting up before 6:30AM. That's better for me anyway.

This morning, Henry was in his high chair. He was "done" eating. So he wanted to "Hold You!" followed by "Hold Mommy!" The one and only good thing about Jeff being away is getting Henry's attention and the extended snuggle time.

I talked with Jeff this morning. Things ended up going OK at his work. He leaves Philly sometime after 5PM. He'll be back in Tucson by 10PM. We are happy that he is coming home!

Jeff ordered beds for the kids last week. When they arrive, we'll get fun bed spreads and sheets. Then, we'll work on transitioning the kids from our bed to their own. My big boy is growing up! I honestly think that the transition won't be too hard for Miss R. She seems to be OK at night as long as she has a blanket and doll or bear. She did wake up once last night and want me to put my hand on her head for comfort.

Tomorrow, we have Miss R's CFT (child family team meeting). We also plan to take a look at one of the daycares.

A Weekend Without Jeff

On Friday, Jeff left for Philly, leaving me to fend for myself with the toddlers. It has been exhausting. I'm going to make it brief.

On Friday afternoon, Grandpa visited in the late afternoon. In the evening, Henry was put in timeout twice. I think that one time was for trying to kick or hit Miss R. I believe the other time was for trying to do something to Bitsy. Henry tried my patience at every turn. I gave the babes a bath. I performed my first attempt at braiding Miss R's hair. It didn't look bad, but it certainly didn't look professional. I didn't have the appropriate bands to hold the braids into place. By morning, they had come out half way.

On Saturday, I made The Twins pancakes in the morning. Miss R rubbed pancake through her hair and into the half braided rows. I gave the kids a bath after breakfast. I braided Miss R's hair a second time. It was a little better. Henry watched The Lady and the Tramp. He requested the "rat" scene "again" and "again." He kept calling the rat a "baby rat" but I told him that it was an adult rat going after the baby. We're working on it. The Twins took a decent nap after much struggle. Henry got in timeout again and then tried to climb out of the crib, which means the crib is no longer a safe location for timeouts.

We went to Grammy and Poppy's house. We didn't see much of Grammy b/c she is sick. We spent time with Aunt Carolyn who had arrived the night before from her trek back from Washington state. She is here for the summer.

Miss R took to Carolyn right away. Henry did an excellent job saying Carolyn's name. He used to call her "Caro" and now he can say her full name. Aunt Carolyn, Miss R, Henry, and I went to the park near CDO. It was busy, but Henry managed to push his way onto slides, making it past kids much larger and older than he. He is fearless. Henry got both me and Carolyn to go down one of the slides. He is a persuasive little guy.

This morning, Miss R started screaming her head off at 5:15AM. I was frustrated b/c she goes through spurts where she won't communicate with the words she knows. Turned out that she just wanted a bottle but woke up Henry in the process. That's frustrating b/c Henry often won't go back to sleep once he is awakened. Luckily, he did eventually go back to sleep in my arms. Yesterday, last night, and today, he was willing to sleep provided that he held me. He said "Hold you!" meaning that he wanted to snuggle. Now that was nice.

We had pancakes again for breakfast. I tried some fresh apricot on them but that was a bust. Miss R ate yogurt happily, and Henry was willing to eat dried fruit leather. We played.

Then Granpa came for a visit. I fed the kids lunch and got them to nap. Granpa is with them now.

That's all from the Wild Kingdom...