29 Months Old!

On Monday evening, the kids took the dogs for a walk with Jeff. They ran into Yvonne. Somehow, they got on the topic of songs. Jeff asked Henry what his favorite "Mamma Mia!" song was in front of Yvonne. Henry replied, "Honey, Honey." He knows what he likes.

On Tuesday morning, it took forever to get the kids out the door. Between having breakfast, diaper changes, teeth brushing, giving Miss R the nebulizer, and braiding her hair (b/c today she was scheduled to have a bio family visit), it took us about two hours to get out the door. I then, of course, realized that I had forgotten the bag that goes along with her to bio visits (it has diapers, snacks, and juice in it). I had errands to run. Dropped my mom's car back at her place. Got a new bag for Miss R (quicker than returning home). Went to order contacts and glasses at Pearle Vision (that took 2 hours...and I knew going into the place exactly what I wanted). Dropped a new bag at daycare for Miss R. Got Lily licensed with the county. It wasn't exactly how I envisioned spending my day. Long story short, Jeff had planned to spend a little time with Henry but when he got to the daycare, they informed him that Miss R had been returned there by the driving service. Apparently, the bio visit got canceled while she was in route. Jeff returned with both kids. The great news was I spent some time with the kids. The bad news was that my work day was blow to pieces.

The kids were very chipper. Miss R gave me a huge hug. Henry wanted to read and color, so that's what we did. Henry made a circle-like object on a paper (kind of a squashed, jagged oval really...but he was very purposeful about it). He wants to learn how to make happy faces on his own. He played on the slide and ball pit and managed to get himself stuck in a net that's supposed to hold balls not boys. He required my help getting out. I took a picture first.

We had a visit with Alison, our family specialist, from A Place To Call Home. Apparently, the agency is cutting back a lot, which is why Alison hasn't been attending Miss R's various meetings. She apologized but figured that we could handle it. We understood. We updated her on the case. She says that what she "thinks" will happen at the Court hearing, if the Court decides to switch plans to a "concurrent" one, is that the bio parents will be given 30 days to either contest the decision to proceed toward severance of rights OR decide to sign away their rights to Miss R. At the following hearing, they would enter their plea: to contest or not to contest. If they contest, then the case goes to a trial, which usually lasts about 3 days (I think Carmen told us that). If they do not contest, then the next hearing would officially "sever" the parents' rights to Miss R. At that point, her case would transfer from CPS to St. Nick's, an organization that handles adoptions in our city. I'm guessing that the parents won't sign away their rights to her. I think that they will fight it. Alison says that if the case goes to trial and they lose, the Court would officially declare them "unfit" and could potentially take away any future babies. So the bio parents have to weigh that in their decision to contest or not to contest. If the case moves toward adoption, there is a separate adoption home study that has to be done. But Alison can use a lot of material from our foster care home study and just put it in a different format. There are some additional questions that we'll be asked, such as what would happen to the kids in the event of our deaths (we have that solution worked out) and would we want R to have contact with the bio family (it depends in part on the circumstance; our guts say that it would be wrong to prevent siblings from seeing each other).

Alison also asked us if we wanted to foster other children. This is something that Jeff and I need to think about and discuss further. The general answer is "yes," but we want to be a bit further along in the process with Miss R before committing to anyone else. Plus, our cars only seat four people. A requirement for taking another child would be having a vehicle that seats as many people as there are in the family. While we want more kids, we've finally established a good routine of sorts. Frankly, that's not something we've had since Henry's birth. We are enjoying having the occasional predictable week. It's nice.

Henry was irked that he had to eat dinner while Alison and I continued talking. I did the house check with Alison. As we went into the kitchen, Henry said, "I want to check the house." He didn't like Alison's answer that she had already checked it.

Henry was great about his teeth earning him a red star, which he decided to put on his big toe. Miss R didn't earn a star, but Henry gave his star to her after about 4 minutes.

It is Wednesday morning. Henry is officially 29 months old (actual)!

FCRB

This morning, Miss R was particularly cheerful at breakfast. When she's gotten enough sleep and wakes up on her own, she is very cheerful in the morning. Henry is too. He again did an excellent job brushing his teething, earning him a gold star.

At 9AM, I attended a Foster Care Review Board (FCRB) for the first time. The FCRB is a panel of citizens who look over foster care cases and make a recommendation to the court. The meeting started off with Miss R's caseworker briefing the board on the status of the case since August. She gave details about the siblings but left the discussion of R up to me. I told them that R is doing well but has some health issues that require some vigilance. They asked me how well she got along with our son. I told them that their teachers report that they hold hands on the playground when the classes are out there at the same time. I suspect that the board had already discussed the case before I entered the room. The board asked some fairly detailed questions to Carmen. One fellow asked me if we would be willing to serve as a permanent home for Miss R. I replied "yes." They said that when a case is not going well, then they usually recommend a fast-track to severance and adoption. They have different recommendations for each child. Unfortunately, one of the siblings isn't getting all of the services needed, so they have some particular recommendations in regards to that child, which will hopefully come to pass. In Miss R's case, her needs are being met by our family. They are recommending that the Court rule in favor of a switch of case plans from the goal of reunification of the biological family to a "concurrent" case plan, which means that the Court would sever parental rights in the near future and have CPS look for a permanent placement (i.e. adoption) for Miss R. In all likelihood, the road to adoption will be a long one, despite the new laws attempting to quicken the process. I will most likely be seeing the FCRB in March to update them on Miss R's status.

Today is my long day at school. I'm currently proctoring my graduate student's first research methods exam. It's a lengthy exam. I'm expecting them to do very well. Jeff is taking care of the kids this afternoon and evening. I am expecting the house to again look like a hurricane hit it when I return home.

Jumping!

This morning, Jeff took the kids to meet my parents at Costco. The kids like to go shopping there. They came back happy. We had lunch and then the kids took their naps.

In the afternoon, I ran errands. Had to get new filters for the air conditioner, a crate for Lily, and fresh veggies for our morning "green slime" juice. Jeff and I had it this morning. I think that the taste is growing on me. I definitely feel more energetic if I start my day with it. We hadn't done it in a couple days, and I could tell the difference. And, I got my standard flu shot at Walgreens. Jeff still has to get his. Grammy and Poppy have already received their shots.

In my absence, the kids and Jeff tore up the the living room. It looked like a hurricane had hit it again. Apparently, they were playing a game where both kids would throw balls out of the ball pit into the living room. Jeff ran around putting them back. It was two against one, and Jeff lost handily.

We took the kids to Grammy and Poppy's house for dinner. We had Mexican. Henry decided my cheese crisp was the thing to eat. The exciting news was that Henry started jumping with both feet as we made our way to the car. Henry's motor skills have progressed nicely...except for the jumping. He's known what jumping is but hasn't been able to execute it. I thought I saw him get a little air between himself the other day, but it was a one time thing. Tonight, he did it repeatedly. You could tell that he was excited that he'd finally figured it out. He was probably also excited because Jeff, Grammy, Poppy, and me were clapping and cheering.

On the way home, Henry announced, "I want to go to Greenwals and get R's medicine." I told him that we'd have to go another day ("Greenwals" = Walgreens). At one point, he was singing ring-around-the-rosie. He was very loud. I offhandly suggested that he try singing it a little louder. And louder he did. Then Miss R go in on the act and shrieked as loud as she could. I recommended that they try even louded, so Miss R and Henry shriekd even louder. I suppose this is why we have loud kids.

When we got into the house about 5 minutes later, the kids were relatively calm. Miss R had her nebulizing treatment with Jeff, while Henry and I played with the trains. Then it was time for teeth brushing and bed.

Tomorrow, I'll be attending Miss R's Foster Care Review Board meeting. I don't really know anything about it other than the time and location. I think that the board wants to ask me questions about Miss R's status. I'd better get some rest. Signing off...

Flips

While I had a long conference call with my co-authors on Saturday, Jeff took care of the kids. He made them pancakes. They played with the trains and played on Couch Mountain.

At 9:45AM, my meeting took a pause. I had told my co-authors that I was going to be unavailable from 10-11AM. They went out to lunch. I did some last minute touch ups around the house. Carmen, Miss R's CPS caseworker, arrived at 10AM. It was a short meeting. Jeff had spoken with Carmen on the telephone earlier in the week, and Jeff knew the information from the CFT. Carmen is going to be recommending severance to the Court, but she needs to talk through the evidence with the state's lawyer. She said that there is a chance that the Court will let the parents have more time on Miss R's case to match the time set for her siblings. Technically, the issue is supposed to be decided for children under 3 within 6 months of their removal from the home. Children older than 3 are supposed to be on a year long plan. We're pretty sure that at least one of the siblings will "age out" within the year, if not both. But I guess judges often ignore the law or interpret it in a skewed fashion. Carmen didn't stay long. She was out the door by 10:23AM. She was satisfied that Miss R is doing well and commented on how happy R looks when she visits.

Jeff got the kids down for naps at 12:30PM. My meeting ended around 2PM. I took care of the kids while Jeff attended a meeting for his work. Miss R was up at 2:30PM. Henry got up around 3PM or so. We colored. I took a good portion of their artwork from school and made collages for the dining room. Jeff purchased poster frames a couple weeks ago. Now we need some bins for the toys, and the train room will be in good shape.

After dinner, we walked the dogs as a family. We saw Yvonne and her dogs, Chocolate and Banjo, and Swanee, Hal, and their dogs, Luke and Annie. Miss R walked a good part of the way on her own, which was nice. She and Henry started off the walk screaming at the top of their lungs (happy screams). Jeff and I aren't quite sure what we done to produce such loud kids.

Henry sang a large portion of the One Two Buckle My Shoe song. Miss R said "Happy Feet" in a very clear voice. We allowed the kids to watch a movie tonight. "Happy Feet" was the choice. After 15 minutes, Henry stopped watching and played around. He wanted Miss R in the ball pit but she wouldn't join him. So I joined him. This thrilled him at first until he realized that I took up a lot more room than Miss R. So he said, "Get out, Mommy." His big accomplishment was learning to flip backward into the ball pit (see 3 second video below).



Miss R crashed during her nebulizer treatment. She didn't make it into the bathroom from brushing teeth. Henry did. He brushed his teeth well and let me cut some of his nails. That earned him two stars. He learned to climb on the rim of our tub (which is much higher than the standard tub). We aren't thrilled with that b/c it just means more locations for Henry to get into trouble. Jackson, our cranky cat, loves to lay on the rim of the tub toward the back. He'll no longer be able to use it as a sanctuary from the kids.

Doctor's Visit...Again

On Friday afternoon, we picked up the kids around 3PM. Dr. Bianchi's office had called and wanted to see Miss R b/c they hadn't planned on her being on the nebulizer long term. And it has been over two weeks.

At daycare, Jeff went to get Miss R. I went to get Henry. Henry gave me a hug and then proceeded to name all of his friends for me, "Elijah, Alex, Shawny, Allie..." He was very cute. We met up with Jeff and Miss R at the fish tank. Jeff and I switched kids. Miss R wanted to "hold you." As we walked out the door, the kids got on a bench near one of the baby rooms and peaked in the window (which they do often). Henry looked in the window and said, "I love you, babies!"

Dr. Bianchi gave us a steroid to add to our nebulizing mix. Her lungs sound OK. We just need to get that cough under control. We think that she's getting a little better. Her nose isn't "exploding" (as Miss Kristen called it) as much as it was yesterday. He also peaked at Henry's ears. They are still a little infected but getting better.

Jeff took care of the kids while I went to Gadabout and Trader Joe's. I returned around 7PM to find the house in order. Both kids struggled against their meds, Miss R with the nebulizer and Henry with his last dose of antibiotics. Miss R fought Jeff just as she had done with me in the morning.

The kids weren't great about brushing their teeth. The standard for Miss R getting a sticker is a bit lower than Henry's. Henry didn't listen to Jeff, so Jeff said he didn't get a sticker. Henry was upset but recovered. Miss R did better than usual, so she got one.

Miss R got up this morning at 6:45AM. I'm in my office now waiting for my co-authors to arrive virtually for a 7AM meeting.

Flu Shot

On Wednesday, my parents had planned to take the kids, but the plans changed when my mom hurt her back. We are hoping that she'll make a quick recovery, but it is clear that it may take a long time. Jeff borrowed my mom's car and got the kids as I had the Element, which has our car seats. I had class and office hours, keeping me at school until 6:30PM. Jeff had a good evening with the kids. With the train room operational, the living room isn't getting as messed up as it usually does. I came home to find the couch cushions in place.

Wednesday night was rough. Miss R's cough was pronounced. We ended up bringing her to bed with us. She used Jeff's chest as a pillow. This kept her head up high, allowing her to breath easier.

On Thursday, Jeff went to Miss R's CFT meeting. Her parents were not there and neither were her siblings, who usually attend. The meeting mainly focused on her siblings. It is a messy situation. I think that Jeff left the meeting feeling down. After the meeting, he returned my mom's car and then came home. I picked up the kids around 4:30PM.

Miss R was excited to see me as usual. Her teachers said that she'd been sneezing all day, so her nose was quite red. Henry was sporting a head injury. Apparently, he'd been laying down, like he does, and another kid sat on his head, giving him a rug burn on the temple.

We went home to get Jeff, but his meeting took a lot longer than planned. So Henry, Miss R, and I picked up Poppy, and we headed to the county health department to get Henry his standard flu shot. I wish his pediatrician had preservative free flu shots because it would be a lot easier. Poppy stayed with Miss R in the lobby, while Henry and I filled out the paper work. We had to stand in line for about 15 minutes. Henry was by far the loudest person in the building. All of the other kids were very quiet. Henry was nothing short of a chatter box. He liked the poles holding up the ropes for the lines. He held onto one and jumped up and down shouting "Stinkies! Stinkies! Stinkies!" Then he'd sit at the bottom of the pole and use his arms to pull himself up saying "Pull up!" as he did so. At one point, he told me that he wanted to sit in some nearby chairs. I told him that he could sit in them. He sat in one quietly for about 30 seconds and then decided to rearrange the furniture. I had to get out of line to get him. Then it was back to the pole and yelling out "Stinkies!"

Henry was calm during his shot. The person administering the shot hit a blood vessel though. It gushed. He got a SpongeBob sticker out of the experience, though, so all was well.

We headed to my parents' house. Jeff arrived with food. But he had to head to my parents' office to use the computer and continue with some work.

I took the kids home. Jeff remained behind. Miss R was OK about the nebulizer but was awful when it came to teeth brushing. I bought stickers the other day as incentive for good teeth brushing. Henry was fantastic about brushing his teeth. I refused to give Miss R a sticker because she was so bad during the brushing. To see Henry get a sticker but not her made her go into tears. Then it was time for bed. That's when Jeff arrived.

This morning, Jeff had a meeting. He got them breakfast but then I did Miss R's nebulizer (she was the worst ever sitting still). I brought the stickers with me to the bathroom. I showed the kids the stickers and explained again, "If you are good brushing your teeth, I'll give you a sticker." Henry was excellent. Perfect. Miss R wasn't bad. Every time she clamped her mouth shut, I said "Do you want a sticker or not?" Then she'd open her mouth for 10 seconds. We repeated the mouth clamping and question several times. The end result was that I didn't have to wrestle her to the floor. So despite the repetitive questioning, it was easier in the end than it has ever been. Both kids got two star stickers and were very happy about it.

Jeff helped me get the kids to the car. I asked Jeff if he wanted me to pick him up a breakfast sandwich from the Glass Onion. Henry said, "I want to go to sandwich." Jeff said, "Sandwich is in England." Henry replied, "I want to go to England." He then announced that he wanted "hand sanitizer." The kids were cute as usual holding hands from the car to the doors of the daycare.

New Shoes

This morning, the kids were pretty good getting out of the house at a decent hour. Miss R didn't struggle as much as she sometimes does when I braid her hair. She was pretty good about it.

I talked with Alison, our family specialist at the agency, today. She had talked to Miss R's CPS caseworker, and it looks like the progression of the case is such that CPS will be recommending severance of parental rights at the mid-October hearing. That doesn't mean, of course, that the court will agree. The judge may decide to extend the time that the parents have to follow the case plan. Alison told Miss R's caseworker that if ties are severed, then we would like to adopt her. She said that Carmen was "excited" that we were interested and told Alison to let us know that it is a lengthy process and can take several months.

Yesterday, when I dropped off Miss R at daycare, her teacher Miss Josie told me that their class (early voyagers) and Henry's class (voyagers) were on the playground at the same time a couple days ago. When Henry saw Miss Josie and Miss Kristen, he automatically searched the playground for R and was concerned at first when he couldn't find her. He eventually found her under the slide. They held hands and played together. Everyone says how cute they are together. And they are. While I was happy to hear more stories about our kids' cuteness, I also got a little bit of a pit in my stomach with the realization that if R were to return to her bio family, it would be tremendously hard on Henry to be separated from R and R to be separated from Henry. They are two peas in a pod.

I think that Jeff and I have done a great job generally speaking of not thinking too much about the future, which is uncertain when one works in fostercare. It is one of those skills that we developed in the NICU when Henry was on the precipice on multiple occasions. One of the foster parents that we met while going through training said that losing a foster child is like having your heart ripped out or your arm cut off. Severance is one step closer to R becoming a permanent part of our family and avoiding that devastation, but a bio relative could come out of the wood works and be given preference over us. So far, they haven't found any relative who would qualify, but in the months ahead, someone may turn up. My heart says that Miss R is supposed to be with us. She melded into our family right away and attached. It only took Henry a month to adjusted from him being the center of the universe to him sharing the center of the universe. That's pretty amazing. My head knows that things are uncertain. So we have to stay focused on the present and not think too much about the future.

As today was a bio family visitation day for Miss R, I picked up Henry to spend some one-on-one time with him. Jeff had some things to do around the house, so I got Henry for the second week running. I think that we are going to tradeoff in the future however. Miss R comes home around 6:30PM, which means some alone time with her for the parent remaining at home. We both want that time with each child, so trading off will work well.

When I picked up Henry, he wanted to know where Miss R was. I said that she was with her bio family, so he'd get to have fun with just Mommy. We were going to go to Monkey Business, but as we left the building, Henry announced that the wanted to "go to the mall" and "Barnes and Noble." I said, "OK. We'll head to the Foothills Mall." But then Henry said that he wanted to go to the "play area." Hands down, Tucson Mall has the better play area. So for the second week running, we went to the Tucson Mall. We rode the escalators several times. Then, we headed to the play area. Henry's climbing continues to be amazing. He loves climbing with the big guys. I don't think that he comprehends that he is smaller than many, if not most, of the kids there.




We shared a slice of cheese pizza for dinner. As we looked around at our other food options, Henry discovered another set of escalators. One was broken, so we had to use the elevator. He found that fascinating. Then, it was back down the escalator and back to the evalator again. He'd mentioned "ice cream" in the car, so I bought him a gelatto. We split it. It was a bit thick, so he needed help scooping it out. Every minute or so, he'd say "I need more ice cream." I'm hoping that some of the fat sticks! While Henry is gorgeous the way he is, I wouldn't mind it if he had a little body fat for the winter...just in case he gets sick and needs a reserve.

On our way back to the car, we passed by a Stride Rite. Henry has been wearing size 8s for awhile. We stopped in and I got his feet measured. He is now at a size 8.5! It's hard to believe. In comparison, Miss R can still wear size 4s. I wanted Henry to have shoes that had the flashing lights on them. That's what we found. He wasn't the most cooperative of clients. We ended up getting him size 9s b/c the saleswoman said that one usually goes up a half size from where the foot currently measures.

We went to Walgreens to get Miss R's medication. Then we headed home. Miss R was happy to see us. She was sporting new shoes as well. The person who dropped her off didn't say anything about the visit to Jeff, but we assume one or both of the parents showed up given the shoes. The shoes are cute and size 5s, which is nice.

After some brief playtime in the train room, it was medicine time, teeth brushing, and time to hit the hay. The kids went down without much fuss.

Christening the Toys

There was an interesting incident this morning. After breakfast the kids were in the train room playing. I was trying to put clothes on Miss R and heard an odd noise. I turned around to find Henry with his diaper pulled down, peeing on the floor. He spashed some of the new train set. When I was pulling up his pants, he said "I peed on my toe" which he had. I hear that is a cure for athlete's foot. Maybe he's trying to tell me something. It's so wonderful to be potty training two kids and a dog. Throw in the cat puke and it's a bodily fluid extravaganza around here.

When I picked up the kids from school, Henry had another "fluid" moment. This time he told me he wanted to pee in the potty. We were near a restroom so we ducked in. He did it perfectly. Let's hope that carries over to the home.

On the way home Henry stated that he wanted to "Go to the party" several times. He also wanted to "Go to the Barnes and Noble store," "Go to the toy store," and "Go to Grammy's house." The other day he surprised me by asking to go to Dr. Bianchi's. When we arrived home, he found some tokens for a car wash and said "I need money for my pockets." I thought we had a few more years before he started asking for money.

I finally had success with a home cooked meal. I made black bean burger patties, and they both seemed to like them. They also had some of the green beans I gave them. Miss R ate a bowl of baby food squash. Henry had asked for it, then refused to eat it. Overall a good eating night.

We took a walk. Henry fell down and scraped his knee pretty good. Lily knocked him down again. I am a bit surprised that the smallest most nimble dog has knocked Henry down twice while the others all manage to avoid him.

I tried putting Miss R to bed without her nebulizer treatment. She had not coughed all night until I had put her to bed and then she only coughed a little so I thought she might be ok without it. I was wrong. At midnight she had a big coughing fit and seemed on the verge of throwing up again. Kate was able to get her up and give her the medicine. They are both asleep on the couch right now.

The Train Room (Formerly Known as the Dining Room)

On Sunday, Jeff took the kids to the park while I stayed home and worked. They attempted to have a picnic, but Jeff reported that it didn't work out too well. The kids were unimpressed with peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. They had a good time playing on the equipment and putting sand on their legs. Henry managed to get sand in his diaper. After that, Jeff took them to Grammy and Poppy's house. They took a nap within a half-hour of their arrival and slept around three hours.

After Jeff dropped them off, he met up with the father selling a tub of Thomas the Tank Engine toys. I'd made arrangements with his wife for Jeff to meet her husband halfway between our homes. Thanks, craiglist! For $75, we got a Deluxe Round House (new costs about $120), 14 trains and 15 box cars (they are used but in working condition), two tunnels (one waterfall tunnel and one that makes a lot of train and car noises), and tons of track. It was a great deal! And now, we really have an excellent set for Henry and Miss R to play with. I don't think that we'll be needing new track any time soon. The dining room has been renamed "The Train Room." Now it is "a really useful" space.

Jeff came home, picked me up, and then we got the kids around 4:45PM. They'd only been up for about a half hour, so Grammy and Poppy didn't really get to spend much time with them.

We took the kids to Monkey Business, which made both Henry and Miss R very happy. In the car ride there, Henry sang "Happy Birthday, Gorilla!" b/c Miss R was looking at the Little Gorilla book. We played games. The kids ate a lot of macaroni and cheese for dinner. Henry claimed that he needed money and stuck his hand in my pockets fishing for coins. He is a persistent fellow.

When we got home, we discovered that Lily had chewed the power cord to the expensive automatic dog door. We were just about to plug it into the door so that she could get in and out at will. But the door is now inoperable. She is so destructive. I'm pretty sure that we are going to have to crate her. I never thought that we'd have to crate a dog, but she is a problem. She's ruined toys, a pair of my dress shoes, carpet, wall, and now dog door.

We played with the trains when we got home. Then, it was bath, medication time, teeth, and bed.

Tomorrow is Daddy Day as it is Monday, and I stay at school until 8:30PM.

Zoo and Nursery

Last night, I was burning the midnight oil, trying to get some work done during the quiet household hours. Miss R's cough got quite bad. She threw up a little in bed (I managed to catch it before it hit the sheets...fun). Jeff gave Miss R treatment with the nebulizer. She had a couple more mini-throw ups of mucous. She practically passed out with the nebulizer on. She woke up when the treatment was over. I held her for awhile. She and I sat in the living room and rocked back and forth. Then I put her to bed. She got upset everytime I tried to leave the room. I ended up sleeping on the floor. She sat up and watched me. Then, I heard a thump. She'd fallen asleep sitting up but fell over onto the pillow. I made sure that she was fine. I layed back down on the floor b/c she was stirring. Roger kept me company. At 4:38AM, I woke up stiff and managed to get to a real bed without waking the kids.

The kids slept past 7:30AM on Saturday. That was nice. Jeff made them pancakes. I made him green slime. We got ready and headed to the zoo around 10AM.














The kids fed the giraffes like experts. I was impressed that Miss R was naming animals without prompting. Henry hung out with a girl who looked like she was about 6. Henry's favorite part of the zoo was the frog that spits water. Jeff took off the kids' shirts so that they could get really wet. Henry was soaked through and through. Miss R was wetter than usual. I was pleased to see her touching the water, if not putting her head in it. She also managed to climb some railing on her own. I was pleased with that too. I mean I know that kids aren't really supposed to climb fences but it was nice seeing her engage those motor skills!

We saw lots of animals. The kids ran around. We were thrilled to see the bears move! Usually, they sleep. Today, one got up, walked around, and then sat in the pool! The aviary in the South America section was a hit. Miss R didn't want to look at the birds though. She was more interested in hanging out in the "egg" while Jeff and Henry looked around and went in and out the doors. We bought the kids a hot dog for lunch. Henry ate the hot dog only because he needed something to use to scoop up the ketchup.

Henry and Miss R fell asleep in the car. We dropped them off at Grammy and Poppy's house. Miss R napped until 4:10PM! Probably has something to do with last night's lousy sleep. Grammy and Poppy took the kids to Home Depot's nursery. The sprinklers were on, and Henry said, "The rain, again, again!"

Jeff and I went to our eye appointments after dropping off the kids. We had an early dinner at El Charro. Then it was home. I walked the dogs. Jeff went and hit some golf balls before picking up the kids. In the span of 21 minutes, the Arizona sky can change dramatically. Below is evidence of what my Dad would call "God's Country"...

When the kids got home, we tried to play with the Thomas the Tank Engine set. Jeff and I built up the rail, and Henry tore it down. The kids brushed their teeth after Miss R's nebulizing treatment and Henry's dose of antibiotics. They went to bed without fuss. I've heard Miss R cough a little bit, but it isn't as bad as last night.

Tomorrow, Jeff plans to take the kids to the park while I work. I just made contact with a person on craigslist who is selling Thomas trains (14), track, tunnels, bridge, and the round house for $75, which is perfect! I was just planning to go to Toys R Us to get more stuff, but slightly used is A-OK if it works and is significantly less expensive than buying it brand new. We'll take a look at it tomorrow.

Back to the Doctor's Office

On Thursday afternoon, I made Jeff and me "green lemonade" at lunch. This is a part of our grand scheme to get healthy. We know that we feel better when we don't eat sugar and refined flour foods. We know that our energy levels are better when we eat veggies, fruits, and proteins. I bought a book on raw foods a couple months ago that argues for this "green lemonade" as the corner stone of a healthy diet. I'll never become a complete raw foodist, but we both agree that more raw, unprocessed foods in our diet would be better for us. And we are both so worn out by the end of each day. We are in need some lifestyle changes that will give us more energy.

At 3:10PM, Jeff took Henry and Miss R to the doctor's office for a visit with the nurse-practitioner. My mom met them there. Henry sounded as bad as Miss R had last week when she was given the nebulizer. The NP didn't think that Henry's lungs sounded wheezy, but she detected yet another ear infection. So Henry's back on the antibiotics, which she wanted him to start right away. The NP thought Miss R was well enough for her flu shot. As it turns out, the pediatrician's office is given preservative free flu shots for their CMDP patients (state patients) but they don't have them for their regular patients. So Miss R got the preservative free flu shot at the office, but we have to trek down to the county health department to get Henry's shot. We don't want him to get the thimerosal-laced flu shot. I just don't see the point in giving him shots with mercury if an alternative is available. It is a crazy system.

When Jeff returned with the kids, we played in the dining room with the new train tracks. We don't have all the pieces to make cool stuff, so I'll probably end up buying more tracks this weekend. We went on a walk after dinner. Miss R wailed b/c I insisted that she walk some of the way without me holding her. Our lucky neighbors got to hear her plight. It was the slowest walk ever. Completely aerobicly ineffective. Afterward, Jeff gave the kids a bath while I went to the pharmacy to get Henry's antibiotics. Then, it was bed time.

On Friday morning, Jeff got me and then the kids up at 6:30AM. I made "green lemonade" with our Juicy Juice Jr. for breakfast. Hoping that the green lemonade, or "green slime" as my friend Erica calls it (she also consumes the slime!), continues to give us energy. We actually felt pretty good energywise on Thursday. I didn't feel quite so sluggish. The kids had oatmeal and sausage. The microwave stopped working, which is frustrating. A couple months ago, it was the refrigerator. A couple weeks ago, it was the oven. Now the microwave. Ugh!

We made it to school in time for Henry to get an early morning session on the playground. He leaves me much more willingly when there's a slide in the equation. Miss R left me willingly b/c her class was getting ready to eat, and she never misses a meal.

Grammy and Poppy got the kids in the afternoon. They reported that the kids ate a leisurely dinner...taking about an hour, which much be a record. Not so much a record for Miss R b/c she loves long meals. But Henry rarely sits anywhere for that length of time. Miss R was happy to see us. Ready to go home and go to bed. Henry stayed up for a little while. He really likes his train set.

That's about it. I'm hoping that we'll get the chance to take the kids to the zoo tomorrow. My cough is back. I'm just wondering when we'll all be well! This is going to be a VERY long flu/cold season.

Ultimate Biting Champion

Monday was Daddy's day with the kids. Typically that means making a huge mess out of the house and rough housing. This week we took it easy. Kate purchased a soccer set some time ago and Henry wanted to play with it as we made our way into the house so I figured I'd give it a try. The set had two goals, a ball, and 4 cones to mark the field. The goals were the most fun, if you find smacking things with plastic pipes entertaining, which 2 year olds do. The pipes also made excellent trumpets as Henry discovered. The set also included nets which enabled us to reenact several scenes from Planet of the Apes as the kids constantly became entangled in them.

After dinner we took a walk with the dogs. We ran into our neighbor Yvonne at the end of our driveway. She loves to see the kids. She and Henry held hands much of the way. We also ran into our other neighbor Hal. Things got a bit rowdy with the six dogs playing. Henry did get knocked down by Lily. He was shocked but otherwise unscathed. Hal pulled the wagon part of the way while I carried Miss R. Miss R did walk a good distance, which is rare for her these days. She does seem to try to test the theory that if you go slow enough you might actually be able to make time go backward. A neighbor we hadn't seen since last fall came jogging by and was surprised to see how big Henry was.

It was then bath and bed time before mommy came home from teaching.

Yesterday was Miss R's bio family visit. I stayed home to meet her afterward. When she came home she had some dinner. We read Bambi several times and played in the living room. Overall, we took it easy.

Kate picked up Henry and went out to spend some mommy son time. At daycare they told her that Henry had bitten another child. No one saw what happened but the girl said that he did it. He didn't break the skin but they had to have Kate sign a paper saying they told us he bit someone. Hopefully he won't be kicked out. He did recently bite Miss R. Hopefully it is a short lived phase.

Kate and Henry then went to the mall at Henry's choosing. Kate said he really likes to run with the big kids. He climbed things the way the big kids would, not the way they were meant to be done. He tested his balance by straddling a wall and letting go with his hands. He crawled after a little girl that he seemed taken with. She didn't return his affections and turned around and smacked him. He saw a picture of a man he claimed was Poppy. It was in fact a local developer who sponsored the new children's wing at the hospital and wasn't exactly a ringer for Poppy in the looks department. One parent called after their child Nicole loudly because the child was doing something dangerous. Henry stood up and started yelling "Nicole!" as loud as he could. He's quite the disciplinarian.

Kate and Henry also stopped by the pet store in the mall, went to dinner at Red Robin and visited Toys R Us. The Toys R Us visit resulted in several new Thomas the Tank Engine wooden train toys.

When Kate and Henry returned the kids played with the new train pieces for some time before going to bed rather late. One small thing I noticed is that Henry has developed a very good writing grip. I'm not sure where he picked it up.

Today, Wednesday, Henry had a haircut. His grandparents picked him up at 7:30am so that he could join Grandma at the salon. Poppy joined them to wrangle Henry while Grandma had her hair cut. He brought along a pocket full of pennies to throw into the fountain to keep Henry busy. He was long overdue for a haircut and it looks great.

The kids went to their Grandparents for the evening. On returning home they both received nebulizer treatments for their coughs. Afterward they both seemed to be revved up. They played in the ball pit together, giggling and laughing. Henry is finding it fun to fall backward into the ball pit, even when he hits his head on the edge. It isn't very hard but it would be nice if he could go an hour or two without bonking his head on something.

Tomorrow we go to get the kids the flu shot at the county health department. Fun.

"So what's your problem?"

On Sunday, Henry woke me up. He came bounding into our bed, but said he likes his "big boy bed" b/c it has "SpongeBob and Patrick!" on it. The kids seemed pretty good health-wise this morning. Henry still has a little cough, but Miss R sounded clear. Hopefully, the cold has run its course. I think that its just a matter of clearing the lungs. I don't think that Henry's had a fever at all through this whole thing.

We took the kids to the Foothills Mall b/c we had to get some items. We started off at Barnes & Noble. Henry showed Jeff where the Thomas the Tank Engine set up was on the second floor. Jeff watched Henry and Miss R while I procured gift certificates for my sister's birthday gift. We knew exactly what we were getting her, which was nice. Her birthday was a couple weeks ago, but tonight was the family get-together. Jeff then took the kids to the play area. They rode on some 75 cent rides and went down the slide. We then took them to lunch at World Sports Grille. We sat outside on the patio. Then, it was time to head to Trader Joe's, which Henry had been asking about for weeks. The kids got balloons at TJ's, which made them happy. I think that Jeff and I sounded better today, but we are both dragging quite a bit. The kids' exuberance in our present state was wearing us out.

The kids took a nap when they came home. When they woke up, we got ready to go to dinner at Grammy and Poppy's house. We were celebrating Erin's and Grammy's birthdays. Our family party was a little smaller than usual as one of our uncles is not in a good health position to catch a cold at the moment. Erin and Brian were willing to take the risk though.

After dinner, Henry and Miss R spent time driving their vehicles off my parents' landing that leads into the living room. It's a half-step. Henry enjoyed propelling his car (gift from Carolyn last year) off the landing and getting it stuck so that the front was on the living room carpet but the back end was on the landing. He'd then shout "I'm stuck in the muck!" Miss R copied him and drove her bike off the landing. They'd then get off their vehicles, pick them up and put them on top of the landing, and repeat the cycle.

Henry decided to play the piano. He asked me to move the stool into position. I did. Miss R wanted a "seat" but there was only the one stool. So Henry moved to one side of the stool, patted the other side with his hand, and said "Here R!" Lots of cute pictures. Wish I could post them (darn foster care privacy rules!).

All of us sat in the living room for awhile and talked. At one point, Henry was swinging a child-sized broom around. I was looking at him. He then looked at me and said "So what's your problem?" I didn't realize that I had one...other than having a very cheeky son, that is.

We came home and brushed the kids' teeth. Jeff put Henry to bed while I used the nebulizer on Miss R. She was very good. It's so much easier when she's half asleep.

Desert Museum

On Friday, the kids went to school in their PJs as it was Pajama Day at school. They both looked super cute. I had a colloquim at school, which I enjoyed. I thought I was feeling better until late afternoon. It was like I hit a brick wall. I came home, walked the dogs, and felt awful. The grandparents picked up the kids at school. They'd had a good day at school. Miss R's report sheet said that she was very "into" the day's activities, which included putting diapers on some dolls. Jeff got the kids from my parents' house. I don't really know much about the evening as I fell asleep unintentionally and didn't wake up until morning.

My lungs still hurt a little this morning, but energy-wise, I felt fine. Jeff was coughing but felt OK. After breakfast, the kids had a great time climbing into the laundry basket of clean clothes, hugging each other, and then tipping if over with themselves inside. They also discovered the joys of the rocking chair and how to make it rock without parental assistance. At times, it didn't work too well b/c they were swinging their bodies in opposite directions, canceling each other's motion out.

Around 10AM or so, we took the kids to the Desert Museum. We felt that was a relatively safe place to go b/c it is almost all outside, meaning that Jeff and I could stay away from other people, keeping our germs contained. All in all, it was a good trip. Miss R was driving us nuts, however, with her throwing temper tantrums if I didn't hold her. She refused to walk, but then got mad if she saw Henry doing something fun. And since Henry was all over the place exploring, he was finding lots of things fun. I don't know if it is a boy-girl difference or just a Henry-Miss R difference, but she is so much more passive than Henry. It is no surprise that Henry has better gross motor skills. He practices them all of the time. She always wants to be held. I've catered to this under the assumption that she wants/needs closeness to an adult that she may have missed out on. But I do think that she needs to move and explore, which she does but only a fraction to the extent that Henry does.

Miss R has also been have these fits where we offer her something (e.g., a cup of water), she says "no," pushes or throws whatever it is away, and then gets mad three seconds later b/c she wants it. Ugh. I think that she's pushed us to the point where we are going to have to create harder boundaries. For example, she started off today's trip by throwing her water cup on the floor. So, we left it on the floor for about 10 minutes (10 minutes of her wailing). She's going to have to learn consequences.

At the tortoise exhibit, Henry found a young girl with whom to flirt. She was about six or so. I don't think that she really noticed him however. He greeted people as they came to the exhibit. He gave everyone an exhuberant "Hi!" and waved. And when people left, he said, "Bye! See you tomorrow!"

Henry enjoyed looking at the beavers in the underwater exhibit. They had a little den setup there. He enjoyed climbing steps of course. He climbed into the crevice of the coati exhibit but couldn't find it. We decided that it must be taking a nap. We stopped at a little cafe for some ice cream. That was Miss R's favorite part of the day.

We decided to forgo the canyon loop, which has the javelinas and coyotes. The cloud cover that protected us during the first part of our day had dissipated. It was hot. We'd tried forcing Miss R to walk on her own but she was having full out tantrums when not being held and we didn't want to ruin the place for the rest of the tourists. So we took a short cut to the cave and geo exhibit. Henry loved the cave. We walked into it, and he called it "The Cave of Wonders!" (reference to Aladdin). We got separated from Jeff and Miss R at one point. They took an exit that we didn't see. Our exit lead to a children's play area where the kids can put on goggles and do some digging.

We then saw the mountain lions and deer. When Henry saw the deer, he called one "Bambi." Miss R very mucy liked the "Bambi." We got the kids a sandwich on our way out. We figured that they should have lunch before driving back b/c they were likely to fall asleep. And sleep they did. They feel asleep about five minutes into our drive.

We then headed to the grandparents. The grandparents were planning to take care of the kids in the afternoon and evening b/c we had dinner plans with friends. The dinner was something that we'd been looking forward to for three weeks. After much discussion, we ended up deciding to cancel. Two of the party are pregnant; one friend (and dinner host) is due at the end of this month, the other friend is due in January. We decided that it would be unfair to put two pregnant women at risk for getting our cold or whatever the heck it is that we have. The host was gracious when I called and said that we could come if we felt better. Energy-wise, we were doing OK. Not running marathons or anything, but we were OK. Our coughs are still present. My concern is knowing that one can still spread germs for a couple days after "feeling" better. Plus, I'd read something about how there is a line of research which suggests that viruses may be to blame for some pre-term labor. Sigh.

Jeff picked up the kids after dinner. Grammy apparently had put her foot down with Henry and refused to give him cookies before dinner, so he was unhappy. When the kids got home, Jeff read Henry a book. I put Miss R on the nebulizer. She was pretty good this time. Then it was teeth brushing and bed.

"I Love Poppy!"

This morning, we called the pediatrician's office and got the OK for Miss R to return to school. Henry and Miss R arrived at school at little later than usual...around 9:30AM. Henry's class was reading a book. Henry clung to me tightly, which surprised me. I thought that he'd run and join the class. I was very popular with the other kids too. Someone different to stare at. Miss R was happy to see Miss Kristen.

I picked up the kids at 4:30PM. I got Henry first. The kids were again listening to a story. His usual teachers weren't there. No idea what was up with that. Henry acknowledged my presence but didn't make any great attempts to hug me or anything. I was again popular with the other kids. I discussed with Aidan how his parents would be arriving soon. Harmoni seemed happy to see me. I talked with a couple kids about the brown monkey. About 5 minutes later, Henry decided that I had established good enough street cred to merit hugging. We picked up Miss R who was thoroughly excited to see me.

As we walked passed the front desk, Henry saw a pretty teacher whom I've never met. But he was obviously eager to obtain her recognition. I think her name is "Miss Casi" or something like that. Henry said (yelled) her name several times until she acknowledged him (she'd been talking to the director) and said good bye.

When we got home, we played for awhile. Jeff made dinner. Cheese crisps and minestrone. The kids weren't excited about the minestrone, but Henry did manage to fish out a couple red beans. Somehow we got on the topic of "The Lion King." I attempted to sing "Circle of Life." My attempt went unappreciated by Henry who bluntly said, "Yuck. Yuck."

After dinner, we played with the trains. I pulled out some toys from the toy pit (formerly known as the play pen). The kids played with a cube that has pictures of our animals, one of Grandpa, and another of me and baby Henry. Henry looked at the cube and said "I Love Poppy!" Then, he gave the cube a hug and said "Huggies! Go to Grammy's house now to see Poppy." Unfortunately, his request went unfilled. He has to wait until tomorrow to see Poppy. Henry and I read. At one point in the evening, Jeff and I were in the kitchen. Henry got his book "Three Favorite Tales." The book includes "The Bremen Town Musicians," "The Little Red Hen," and "The Princess and the Pea." The stories aren't listed on the cover. Henry brought the book to Jeff with the page turned to the third tale "The Princess and the Pea" and announced the name of the story b/c that's the one he wanted hear.

We decided to forgo the bath tonight. We played for awhile. In a bizarre twist of events, Henry bit Miss R on the arm during what had been a happy, laughing, fun playtime. I have no idea what brought on the behavior. He was sent to timeout. He didn't break the skin. Jeff got a piece of ice and put it in a sandwich bag to put on the area to minimize swelling. Miss R was so fascinated by the ice that she forgot her injury. We made Henry apologize to Miss R, which he did.

I sat with Miss R during her nebulizer treatment. She wiggled a lot. And then the kids went to bed after brushing their teeth. Jeff oversaw the ritual of going to bed. I caught up with an old high school friend whom I hadn't spoken to in years, which was fun.

Signing off...

Return to the Pediatrician's Office

For what seems the hundredth time this summer we went to the pediatrician today. Henry had complained of his ears hurting a couple times recently. Last time he had an ear infection he had only complained once to Grandma and so we didn't realize he had one. Fortunately he doesn't have an ear infection right now. There is fluid behind his ear drums but no infection.

Miss R has had an increasingly severe cough and had a fever yesterday. Today there has been no fever. Last night her cough was so bad I ended up holding her on the couch until 1am because being upright seemed to help. When the doctor listened to her lungs he said she was "wheezing". She was given Albuterol via a nebulizer which helped tremendously. We now have a nebulizer at home with a prescription for Albuterol to administer every 4 hours. Fun. On the plus side, she is very well behaved when receiving the treatment. It takes about 10 minutes during which time she needs to sit fairly still with a mask over her mouth and nose. If it was Henry we'd be lucky to get in 2 minutes.

Thankfully Grandma was able to meet me at the doctor's office and take the kids from there. I had a conference call at 7:30 am and 11am and managed to fit the doctor visit in between. Grandma had a meeting that she had to leave for at 12:15 so Grandpa stepped in and took over. I was thrilled to hear he was able to get them both down for a nap, despite Miss R trying to get Henry to wake up when he went to sleep first. Then they both had poopy diapers in the afternoon and he changed them. That might be the first time he has changed them on his own.

I picked them up around 7pm. I wanted to do it sooner but I was feeling very ill myself in the afternoon and spent my time alternating between work, cleaning dog messes, and deliberating on whether to induce vomiting on myself. Glamorous.

The kids were still pretty wound up when we got home. Miss R had something to eat while Henry gave us more food for thought on the "can he read?" question. He pulled a dvd off the shelf near the back door and said "Yoga". It was indeed a yoga dvd. How he knew it was a yoga dvd we don't know. He certainly has never seen us doing yoga or any exercise more vigorous than walking the dogs or playing with the kids. Then he grabbed a puzzle that we had bought over the weekend. It was still in the box, he had never seen it before and he immediately recognized it as a puzzle, repeating "puzzle" and "pieces" as he walked around with the still unopened box. How he knew it was a puzzle we don't know. Kate tried to get him to point to the word puzzle on the box but he would not or could not. How he manages to identify those two items if he can't read, I don't know.

Henry had managed to cover himself in ketchup at Grandma's house so we gave them a bath before bed. So far Miss R is doing well, no coughing fits. Hope that lasts the night.

Unrelated to the kids, here is a cool lightning picture I took last night. It was the best storm we've had all summer, which isn't saying much, it's been a lousy summer for storms.

"I stuck in the muck."

Around 11:30AM, Miss R's teachers called to say that she had a temperature of 101.5. So Jeff got her b/c I was on a conference call. She was warm when she came home, so we gave her some Tylenol. She was highly irritable and irrational. She claimed that she wanted "sleep" or "bed" but then would scream if I put her down. I got her some lunch. One minute she seemed fine, the next minute she was screaching as though someone had pinched her hard or something. The rapid change w/o cause was kind of disturbing. She again claimed that she wanted "sleep" but then threw a major fit. We ended up letting her cry it out b/c we couldn't do anything to satisfy her and we suspect that tiredness was perhaps a trigger for her irrationality.

When she woke up, Jeff took her to get Lily. Lily was spayed. She has to take it easy for the next two weeks. She looks exhausted. She also has to stay away from boy dogs b/c she'd already started her heat cycle. That includes neutered males who may not have the equipment but may still have the desire to act.

I took care of Miss R while Jeff got Henry. Henry had a good day. He and Daddy went to R&R Pizza to get us some dinner. He played some videogames while waiting for the order.

Henry had a large dinner. He had pizza and breadsticks. He's been a very good eater as of late. I don't think that he's putting on weight, but he is eating. Miss R picked at her food but didn't eat much.

After dinner, we opened a gift that Jeff and I bought over the weekend. It is cardboard pictures of children's faces from different nationalities. The cards can be matched if one wants to play memory. Henry has been wanting to open that box for a couple days now. He liked it a lot. And he was even able to match some of the cards with each other. Miss R just played with the box.

While we were playing with the cards, Henry found what I thought was a piece of cardboard on the floor. He mentioned something about Devonshire. Jeff asked me if he was talking about Robinhood. I thought so. Jeff pointed out that the cardboard sliver was the former binding of the Robinhood book. See picture on the left.

Once playing with the cards was done, Henry had fun climbing on the cat tree. Jeff made sure that he didn't hurt himself. I asked Henry if he was stuck. He replied, "I stuck in the muck." We have no idea where he learned that phrase.



Then, it was time for a bath and teeth brushing. Then bed. The kids went down easily until just now. Miss R is back up and crying. We don't know why. Jeff just relieved me. I suspect that it will be a long night.

"I need my cellphone."

Jeff took Lily to the vet's office this morning so that she could get spayed. Guess it was good timing when we found her. She was just about to go into heat.

I got the kids dressed and out the door. It was a challenge. Miss R especially was putting my temperament to the test. She refused to sit down in her high chair at breakfast. Got mad when I insisted that she sit if she wanted orange juice. Ugh. Henry was actually really good. Easy to dress. Cheerful.

The highlight of the morning took place in the parking lot of Children's Learning Adventure. As I was getting the kids out of the car, Henry matter of factly announced, "I need my cellphone." Indeed.

More "Needs"

This morning, Henry went to the pantry after waking up and pulled the box of Bisquick off the shelf. He was frustrated b/c it was too heavy to carry by himself (it was the Costco sized box of Bisquick). He announced that he wanted "pancakes."

As Jeff began making pancakes, Henry announced "I need food for Henry." So cute!

Henry ate a lot of breakfast. Three or four pancakes (where does he put them?!?), sausage, and Morning Star veggie bacon. Miss R barely touched her food. She didn't feel well upon waking up and threw up a little bit.

After breakfast, we played in the room formerly known as the dining room. The kids played with the trains. Miss R had Henry's carnival train. It has a little door that opens. There is a picture of a lion inside. When you open or close the door, it roars. Henry kept trying to take it from Miss R, saying "thank you, thank you" to make it OK. I told him that he had to wait until she was finished, which didn't make him happy when he'd been so polite about taking it.

We dropped the kids off at my parents' house and headed off to Phoenix for the Diamondbacks vs. L.A. Dodgers game. The game was not noteworthy.

The kids had a good day. Miss R was very easy to take care of, but my mom said that she was obviously not quite herself and rather subdued. Henry was active. Miss R napped. Henry did not.

My mom tried to put the kids down for a nap in my parents' bedroom. Henry scooted down the bed and announced, "Poppy's in the TV room. We watch sports." And then he trotted off to find Poppy.

At one point in the day, Grammy reported that Henry said, "I need money." Apparently, he wanted something to put in his pocket. Money is a wise choice.

Miss R wanted to go swimming. My mom called us when we were on the road heading back to Tucson. We planned to take her swimming when we arrived, but she was asleep on the couch. So we had dinner. Henry played with dinner, didn't really eat. Miss R woke up in the middle of dinner. She had a few bites of banana but didn't really eat either. We came home after dinner.

Before we left, however, Henry was on the floor of the TV room pretending to sleep. He was pretending to snore too. Jeff and I squabbled over who he was imitating. My mom asked him, "Henry, does your mommy snore?" Henry threw himself dramatically over a pillow and gave an impression of me snoring. We laughed. Then, my mom asked him, "Henry, does your daddy snore?" Henry did another impression, snoring even louder this time.

Henry fell asleep (for real) in the car. Miss R was awake. I got her "food" at her request. But she just ate the cheese and ignored the pasta that I had put out for her. Halfway through the meal, she said she wanted "Daddy," so I got Daddy for her. Daddy took care of her. I attended to Henry who was having a nightmare of some sort. That makes me sad b/c unlike most kids his age, I know that Henry has some truly bad experiences in his past from the NICU and I hope that he isn't reliving them. Having been away from the NICU with some perspective, I know that what Henry endured was tantamount to torture in what it must have felt like to have needles poking into his fetal tissue with raw nerve endings. Obviously, the goal wasn't torture but survival, but the neonate doesn't know that at the time. I held him. He snuggled into me. Fell back to sleep after having some water.

"Happy Birthday, Aunt Carolyn!"

This morning, we went to a park in Marana. As we drove to the park, which is 10-15 minutes away from our house, we passed "Monkey Business," which Henry of course noticed and informed us of its location. He is very observant and has a keen sense of direction.



Henry had a great time at the park. Miss R was a fussy and basically wanted to sit on me just about the whole time. Jeff gave me some relief so that I could play with Henry. Miss R was irked that I wouldn't place her at the top of the roller slide every time that she wanted to go on it. I wanted her to actually walk up the steps by herself once in awhile.

After the park, we headed to Toys R Us. We passed "Monkey Business" again, and Henry repeatedly said "I want to go to Monkey Business!" Mind you, the building and sign for Monkey Business are fairly nondescript. There's no icon or animal character to let one know what it is w/o reading the sign.

When we pulled into the Toys R Us, Henry pointed out the sign for "AT&T" which is nearby. We still don't know why he knows AT&T. We aren't patrons. I asked Henry where we were going. He said, "Get toys!"

Henry was irked that Miss R was put in the basket, not him. So he decided to go on a shopping spree, putting anything he touched into our basket. Jeff spent his time putting the items back.

We made our way to the Thomas the Tank Engine table. Henry and Miss R happily played at the table display while Jeff and I debated if we should get it. We'd been talking about getting Henry the table for some time now. That Miss R appeared to love the table too, added to its appeal. We never got Henry his 2 year adjusted due date present, so it was time to do so.

While we debated what exactly to get, another family (dad and two boys probably 5 and 7) visited the area. Henry was fascinated by the older boy's brown curly hair. He ended up patting the boy on the head as the boy looked at the table. Luckily, the boy didn't mind and his father was amused. The boy's hair was pretty amazing, the kind of soft natural curls that would make most people envious.

We got the table and a starter set (with Thomas and Percy trains). The starter set doesn't come with enough track, but we figured that we should look on craigslist and ebay before investing more. The table has two sides. One side has a light built in track, which should keep the kids entertained for now.

We went back home. Got the kids some lunch. Then it was nap time. I took a nap myself. I was exhausted. It was pretty clear at this point that all four of us are sick with a cold. While the kids and I napped, Jeff set up the Thomas & Friends table in the dining room. It looks great!

Miss R got up long before Henry did. We called Carolyn and left her a happy birthday message. By 5PM, Jeff decided it was time to get Henry out of bed. Henry was reluctant. As he entered the kitchen, however, he perked up and announced "I need ketchup." He repeated this several times. I don't think that he had plans for putting the ketchup on anything. Perhaps he, like members of the Reagan Administration, felt that ketchup constituted a vegetable on its own. While I was making dinner, Carolyn returned my call. Henry sang her Happy Birthday. He did an excellent job.

I was tempted to put a DVD into the machine as we are all sick and it would have been nice to veg out. Jeff gave me a little bit of a guilt trip over it. He's more anti-TV than I am when it comes to the kids (and I'm not exactly a big TV proponent). So the TV stayed off as usual. Jeff took the dogs for their evening walk, and the kids and I read books. We read "Bambi Grows Up" and "Mickey Mouse and the Haunted House." It's been a long time since we had read the latter. Then, we headed to the dining room to play with the trains.

Henry discovered the drawer on the bottom of the table. He enjoyed putting the trains away and announced "That's better" when it was all cleaned up.

Then, it was bath time. Henry allowed me to film his rendition of Happy Birthday for Aunt Carolyn...



Then, it was time to brush teeth and head to bed. A busy day.

Tomorrow, Jeff and I are going to Phoenix for a Diamondbacks game. Miss R and Henry will be spending the day with their grandparents.

"I need a cookie!"

This morning, we took the kids to Tohono Chul Park's tearoom for breakfast. We sat outside. It started to sprinkle, so we ended up under an awning. Henry managed to grab a tsp of butter and stick the whole thing in his mouth before we could stop him. He seemed happy with it at first but then less enamored toward the final swallow. The kids were a little loud, singing Ring-Around-The-Rosie, but ate well. Jeff took Henry and Miss R to the back gardens where they joined a five year old girl and her little brother playing hide and seek. Henry enjoyed chasing the little girl.

We then headed to the park near CDO. We had a good time. We had a weird experience when we first got there though. Jeff kept close tabs on Henry. I was helping Miss R. There was a corkscrew slide on this particular equipment. There was a little girl Henry's age or maybe a couple months older taking FOREVER to get to the slide, so Henry went around her and went down the slide. She had a fit that Henry passed her and claimed that he'd pushed her. Jeff was watching and said that it wasn't true. The mom responded to the girl's fit by saying something like "Don't worry honey. You don't have to stay here. I'll take you to buy shoes instead" blah blah blah and completely catered to her whining and lying. Such a sad state when parents don't introduce a little bit of realism and responsibility into their child's life. So the mom decided to take the girl away. She left her other child, about 5 years old, with her aunt. The 5 year old was making sand piles near the equipment. At one point, she left her stuff to go play, and Henry went over and was fiddling with her shovel. Now, in our experience, all of the park parents are pretty cool with sharing toys if kids aren't using them. On several occasions, we've let other kids play with Henry's stuff and Henry has on occasion used other kids' stuff. I asked the aunt if it was OK if Henry used the shovel for a minute. She said that I had to ask the little five year old. The little five year old wasn't happy that someone would touch her stuff. So it didn't work out. Oh well. I took Henry back to other area to play with some things that we'd brought. I had to raise an eyebrow when the little girl was rejected from another group of kids who basically didn't want her to play with them. Perhaps it was b/c she had been instructing them on the proper way to build a sand castle. That's a sure way to become popular. Don't share, be selfish. And if you do "share," only do it under the condition that the other kids have to do everything your way. I know that there isn't a best way to parent, but I'm darn sure that there are wrong ways to parent. I didn't like Henry getting blamed for something he did not do by the little sister. I didn't like watching the older kid be selfish (although I know if it's not illegal, otherwise half of America would be behind bars) and not get called out on it. Frankly, the kid is going to be lonely as evidenced by other kids her own age already rejecting her. Had I not seen how she'd treated Henry, I probably would have felt sorry for her under the assumption that she'd been wronged. I do feel sorry for it but b/c her family obviously is spoiling these kids to the point where no one else is going to be able to stand them (unless they are fabulously rich, I suppose).

Well, Henry and Miss R had a wonderful time at the park. Miss R went down the corkscrew slide all by herself several times. I worried that it was too steep, but as Jeff pointed out, Miss R manages to go down slides slower than anyone would have thought possible by positioning her feet much like one does when when is trying to stop on skis.

The kids spent time on several different pieces of equipment. We met a very cute 20 month old named Brooke who was very nice. Henry watched some of the big kids climb across the monkey bars. He wanted to try them too. So I picked him up and let him grab one of the bars. I stood underneath him but let him do the work. He managed to let go of one hand and swing his body to the next bar and grab on. I was impressed. He then let go, and I caught him.

As we left the park, Henry had an accident. Jeff was holding his hand. Henry was running his other hand along the metal rope lining the side walk. He stuck his finger in the post holding up the rope, but Jeff didn't notice and pulled him. Henry's finger was scraped pretty good with some flesh having come off. I'm pretty sure that Jeff was more upset than Henry. We had planned a trip to Trader Joe's and then home, but instead, we went to Grammy's house to get some antiseptic on the wound. I washed Henry's hand with soap and water. My mom put some antibacterial ointment on it, and then put a band aid on it. Henry was interested in the band aid for a couple minutes but then wanted it off. My mom volunteered to keep the kids for the afternoon.

On the way to the bedroom for nap time around 2PM, Henry said to Grammy, "Take it off and put it in the garbage" in reference to the band aid.

So Jeff and I went to a movie, (500) Days of Summer. In our absence, the kids took a three hour nap at the grandparents' house. We joined them for dinner. Both kids were coughing and sneezing. Jeff's now coughing and sneezing too. He says that I've sneezed several times, I just seem not to have noticed. My head is feeling pressured at the moment. I can't believe we've acquired yet another illness. We are magnets.

We came back home after dinner. We gave the kids a much needed bath, after their day in the sand. We brushed the kids' teeth. Henry wanted a book, so we read. Then he announced "I need a cookie!" (thanks Grammy). We don't have any refined sugary treats in the house. He was adamant about it too. He settled for a Trader Joe's fruit bar. Then Miss R wanted some too. We ended up brushing their teeth again. After Miss R's last pediatric visit, I'm especially serious about making sure that she brushes her teeth after eating. No eating before bed w/o following up with a trip to the bathroom.

Grammy said that she'd take the kids tomorrow, but Jeff and I want a full day with the kids. We had some fun things planned, but it will depend on everyone's level of sickness. Henry was complaining about his ear tonight, so a trip to Urgent Care for an ear check may be in our future.

Cheeky Little Fellow

Grammy and Poppy collected the kids at daycare. They both had good days. And they both ate large dinners. Henry ate a lot of sausage apparently. Miss R ate some sausage but ate all of her raisins and mandarin oranges.

Jeff had a great time playing golf. I got a couple things done around the house and took the dogs for a walk. We went to dinner before collecting the kids around 7:30PM.

Per usual, Henry saw me, smiled, and proceeded to turn toward the TV. Miss R was excited to see me, squealed with delight, and ran over to me. She told me that she wanted to go "home." I sat with her on the couch while I caught up with my parents.

I asked Henry if he knew what tomorrow was. He said, "Saturday. No school." We were surprised that he knew the days of the week. We've mentioned them a couple times before, but not recently. I didn't expect him to know the order or anything. Perhaps the teachers were talking about "Saturday" at school.

My mom said that Miss R had pooped in her pants at one point in the late afternoon. She asked Miss R, "Do you have a poopy pants?" Miss R said "No. Henry," and then pointed toward him. My mom was sure it wasn't Henry. But she asked him. "Henry, do you have a poopy pants?" Henry said, "No. Grammy have poopy pants?" He was being cheeky.

While talking with my parents, Henry tried to push Miss R off my lap by head butting her. I said, "Henry. No. Timeout." Firm and curt. Miss R was crying b/c he hit her hard enough to hear the sound of two skull colliding. Henry got upset at being put in timeout. I'm of the opinion that we need to nip these actions in the bud before he really hurts someone or himself. Of course he wanted attention, but he isn't allowed to hurt someone else to get it. Period. My feeling is that one should neither act hostilely nor do the pretend sad thing toward toddlers under some delusion that it will induce guilt. Trying to induce guilt in a two year old is about as productive as herding cats. Frankly, I find it nauseating when caregivers do the "Oh honey, I'm sure that you didn't mean to hurt anybody but that was naughty, let's not do it again" in a sugary voice. It is misleading to a child who does not yet rationalize his/her actions. The vocal intonation should be forceful and firm (not yelling of course, unless one wants loud kids) and should match the rhetoric. Jeff agrees. He put Henry in timeout for 2 minutes. Henry was upset but not remorseful. He was reluctant to apologize. Sometimes, he is very good about it. This time, he was not. But when he finally said "I'm sorry, R" and gave her a hug, he did a good job. Miss R wasn't particularly receptive toward the hug. I suspect her head was still aching. As Henry does feel pain like a normal person does b/c of his high pain tolerance, we have to be serious about him learning to control his actions around others lest he hurt someone else or hurt his body but not know it.

We headed home around 8PM. The kids were obviously tired. They didn't fall asleep in the car. Jeff read "Robinhood" and "Bambi Grows Up" to Henry when we got home. While reading "Robinhood," Miss R and I leafed through "Bambi." She pointed out many of the characters in the pictures. She is doing so well with her vocabulary. It is nice to see.

The kids took forever to get to bed. Miss R strugged with teeth brushing before bed as usual. She told me that she wanted to go to bed. She was settled in her bed. Then Henry came into the room and snuggled with me on the floor. That sent Miss R into a tizzy. She cried even after Henry got into his bed. I left the room figuring that she was putting on a little green monster show for my benefit. Ah, the joys of parenthood. Jeff got them settled and fell asleep on their floor. I got him up after awhile so that he could sleep in a real bed. The household is currently quiet. I had wanted to watch a movie but decided that I would just fall asleep during such a thing.

Lily

One knows that things are quiet on the western front when one gets to blog about one's dog. As we mentioned earlier this week, the pup that I found in the middle of a major road a week and a half ago is legally ours. I just wanted to post a picture of her. We are calling her Lily.

I dropped off the kids at daycare around 8AM. Henry's class was coming inside and Miss R's class was going outside. Henry joined Miss R's class so that he could use the slide about five times before I caught him (he kept giving me the slip) and took him to join his class in their classroom. We need to do a better job getting out the door so that Henry can have his early morning exercise too.

I've been working on book and home stuff today. One of my co-authors met with our editor at a conference this morning. He's reading the first draft now and will have comments to us next week. We then have until October 1 to finalize everything. Publication is set for March.

The weather looks great outside. Jeff has headed out the door to play golf with Steve. The grandparents want to pick up the kids at school. I have the house to myself (and two dogs, three cats, and probably some hidden scorpions).

OK. Back to work.

Emotional Days

On Wednesday, Grammy and Poppy wanted to pick up the kids in the afternoon. I teach in the afternoons, so it was a good time for Henry and Miss R to spend with them. They went swimming.

When they got home, I asked Miss R what she did that day. She said, "Grammy's house." I was pleased b/c I think that's the first time that she's answered a question for me unrelated to food, teeth, or bed and where the answer to the question wasn't "no."

Henry was fussying about wanting more food when he came home, although my understanding is that he had a decent sized dinner. We agreed to give him a snack if he took his gummi vitamin bear first (tastes just like the candy). That resulted in a major melt down b/c he refused to try gummi bears. Why is a mystery. Miss R, on the other hand, loves them so much that she gets mad when we only give her two (the recommended daily allowance). We have added gummi "fiber bears" to her menu, but she's only allowed one bear at a time (3 times per day). Long story short, the kids went to bed grumpy.

Both Jeff and I stayed up late. Jeff worked on a project until 3AM. I got caught up on paying our bills.

On Thursday morning, I dropped the kids at school around 8:30AM. Miss Josie told me that Miss R had a strange, emotional moment yesterday. She was playing near the window by herself. Seemed to be fine. And then all of a sudden, she got a very sad look on her face and started crying. No other kids were near her, so it wasn't as though someone took a toy from her or something.

I've felt that Miss R has been very emotional this month. After bio visits, she expects me to hold her for an hour or two. I'm good with that within certain boundaries. For her, sitting next to me won't do. She practically climbs on top of me. Freaks out if I put her down to go to the kitchen to get her a bottle. That's where the situation becomes problematic. It probably hasn't helped that I've been working so hard the last couple weeks. Preparing classes. Finishing up book chapters. Now that most of that work is done, I'll be able to get back to normal. I mean, I've certainly spent time with the kids but not as much as usual. Jeff has tending to their needs the past couple weekend. Taking them places. And they've been having a good time. Miss R just seems a bit needy and possessive of me when she sees me. I love how excited she gets when she sees me; I just wish we had a little more balance and she didn't get upset if I choose not to hold her every moment. Tonight, she was in a state. I was holding her. She wanted my tea. I tried to give her the tea. She rejected it. She wanted her juice. I gave her the juice. She threw it but then wanted it. So irrational! And then she'd cry. I don't know what's up.

My parents offered to take the kids in the afternoon, but we wanted them. The plan was to pick them up and take them to Toys R Us. Henry has a gift card from his aunt and cousins that he hasn't used yet. Long story short, my cough returned (again) this afternoon. I took my cough medicine but had a really bad reaction to it. Majorly tired and dizzy. And I can't keep anything down. I assume that it is the cough medicine anyway. When it was time to get the kids, Jeff looked at me and said that I looked really pale. So he picked up the kids.

They went to the car wash, which the kids found scary at first but then interesting. When it was done, Henry wanted to do it again. They came home and we played in the living room. I bought some alphabet flashcards awhile ago. We've only used them a couple times for a few minutes here and there. Henry likes holding the cards, throwing the cards, and identifying the objects in the pictures. We haven't discussed letters yet. Miss R got into the act as well (from my lap of course). She did a good job identifying objects. Jeff and Henry played on couch mountain.

They had a good dinner. Henry really wanted babyfood greenbeans. We had some in the pantry and let him have them. He had two tubs (as well as other things). Perplexing. Babyfood greenbeans: YES! Gummi bear vitamins: NO! I made the mistake of having some soup. It didn't go over well.

We played in the living room again. The kids had a bath. And then bed.

Grammy and Poppy want the kids tomorow afternoon. Jeff playing golf with our friend Steve. I'll be staying home, finishing up what I didn't accomplish today b/c of that awful cough syrup.