Henry's nanny started this morning. I have decided to write this blog entry mid-morning as a diversion from what I really want to do, which is just peek at Henry and give him a kiss on the cheek. I know that Veronica needs time to get to know Henry, and I suspect that at some level parents can be more of a hindrance than a help at figuring a baby's cues.
Yesterday, my mom took care of Henry in the morning, while I went to school. In the afternoon, we had an appointment with Dr. Bianchi, Henry's pediatrician. We are really concerned about Henry's eating habits. His caloric intake is down. Basically, Dr. Bianchi thought that Henry looked good. In regards to this eating habits, he wants us to wait and see what happens. Since Henry's last weighing at the doctor's office in December, he has gained weight (even though we know that he hasn't gained weight in over two weeks). He weighed 15 lbs 10 ozs. His length was 25.25 inches. His head circumference was 42.1 cm (nearly 0.8 cm less than at Dr. Hassan's office). Dr. Bianchi said that he'll probably "catch-up" by age two.
Henry had his polio booster shot before he left the office. He didn't flinch, peep, or cry. I've read that preemies have high pain tolerances.
Doctors and most preemie parents are obsessed with the idea that preemies should "catch-up" to their actual ages. There is a preemie message board that I frequent. I often get annoyed at the parents who are "freaking out" over their kids who are supposedly "developmentally delayed" because the parents refuse to recognize that development starts at conception, not when the baby pops out of the womb. I guess doctors mention the catch-up by age 2 thing a lot to pacify anxious parents. Jeff and I don't care whether or not Henry ever "catches up" with his actual age. What we want is for Henry to be on target with his adjusted age (when he should have been born). Tomorrow, Henry will be nine months old (actual).
When we were at the doctor's office, Sean, the medical assistant, said that we could fill out a developmental questionnaire. She said that Henry probably wouldn't do well on it b/c he was a preemie. At the top of the questionnaire, it said "Development 9 Months." So basically, we looked at a bunch of questions and surprise, surprise, Henry doesn't have the skills of a 9 month old. Henry doesn't wave "bye-bye" yet or pull himself to a stand. [Eye roll]. We should have been given the questionnaire for 5-6 month olds. That would have been appropriate. Apparently, Dr. Bianchi doesn't give the Denver scale until 9 months. His partner, Dr. Swanson, gives it to her patients from birth. Some people argue that in the early months, the testing isn't particularly informative.
In terms of evaluation, doctors are wedded to the chronological age that is listed on the birth certificate. They often consider preemies as "having problems" because they aren't "caught up" with their actual ages. Henry has had his share of legitimate problems, but I just wish the medical profession could separate out with greater clarity when there is a true problem versus the socially constructed problems of actual versus adjusted age. At least Henry's early intervention team (e.g., Tara and Cuyler) is on the same page as us and simply treats Henry by his adjusted age. And to be sure, Dr. Bianchi thinks that Henry is doing very well for a preemie. I just wish we could put the whole preemie aside and just talk about Henry as a 5.5 month old (for all purposes but vaccinations).
Incidentally, I strongly suspect that the reason preemies supposedly "catch up" to their actual ages by 2 years has nothing to do with suddenly making leaps in development. It has to do with the fact that there is so much variance in what kids do at that age. A preemie who was born 15 weeks early could look "normal" because there will be a lot of full-term kids who are late bloomers developmentally, making the preemie look OK.
So where does that leave us with Henry? Well, he is doing well with his new skills. We haven't been forcing any tummy time on him. He is rolling around so much that he is doing the tummy stuff on his own. He does better when he is the one who has made the choice to be on his stomach.
Food. I have no idea what to do with this kid. Jeff and I have already played the "wait and see" game. Concrete solutions would be nice. We did try avocado puree on Henry last night. He didn't mind it. It was time to add a new food. Our friend Jenny had mentioned giving avocados to her daughter. She gave me the instructions for it: 1 tbsp of avocado with 2 ozs formula (or breast milk in Henry's case) put in a blender. I bought a fantastic avocado (nice, ripe, and delicious). It was the first of Henry's foods that I have made from scratch (not including the breast milk of course). Avocados have good fats and lots of calories (things Henry needs, especially given his hunger strikes). Jenny recommended a book on making baby foods. She is the second friend of mine who has made her child's baby foods. Our friend Laura does it too. We'll see if Henry likes it again today.
That's all for now. The distraction has been long enough. Mother hen has to go check on her chick.
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