I managed to get the kids into the building all by myself at 7:57AM. I got Miss R out of the car first, minimizing the chances of Henry running into the parking lot by himself. There was a lady at the sign-in desk whom I didn't recognize but she recognized the kids. Surprising given that there are several classrooms running. All staff members, however, seem to have made an effort to get to know Henry and Miss R, or at least recognize them by sight.
As we approached the fish tank, Henry's class was coming inside from the playground. I decided, however, to drop off Miss R first. Her class was had just arrived on the playground. Miss Josie signed in Miss R. She said that she was very impressed with Miss R's first day. Miss R cried when I turned her over to Miss Josie, but I think that she recovered quickly. I asked Josie if I could take Henry on a slide before going to class. She said sure. I headed with him to a deserted area of the playground, near on open area with the misters that several kids, about four years old, were occupying. As I let Henry get on the slide, two sets of little four year olds came over and told me that Henry was too young to play in their area and that two kids his size had broken their arms on their equipment. It was weird being admonished by four year olds. I told them that Henry was just going on one slide and had gotten permission from a teacher because I was monitoring him. I don't think that they approved though.
Once Henry had done the slide, I took him inside to his class. He didn't want to go into the room. He said "go home." He wasn't happy. He wanted to "hold you." So I did. Two of his classmates struck up conversations with me while I held him. After several minutes, he didn't seem to be calming down. He wanted "Daddy." I felt like I was perhaps prolonging the tension, so at 8:25AM, I said goodbye and told him that we'd pick him up in a couple hours. I hate seeing him upset. As I left, I tried to see what he was doing on the monitors, but I couldn't get a good view of him.
Although Jeff will be the good "pick up" parent in the afternoon, I wanted to see Henry and Miss R and make sure they were doing well, so I went with Jeff to get them around 3:15PM. We picked up Henry first. As we peered into the window of his room, the kids were sitting around Miss Stephanie, listening to her read. Despite the fact that Henry is definitely one of the younger kids (if not youngest given the whole preemie thing) in the class, he clearly had the best attention span (tied with one other little person) when it came to listening to the teacher read. He was following along; his head wasn't looking around. Excellent focus. No fidgeting. One worry about Henry's extremely early birth is that it makes him much more likely to be an ADHD candidate. In fact, I remember laying in the recovery room after my c-section and being visited by Dr. Cahan, the neonatalogist, who was standing on my left. She was giving me the update on Henry's status. I hadn't seen him yet and wouldn't for another couple hours. I asked about risks. She was kind but frank and said that he would in all likelihood have some sort of disability, ADHD at the least. I wish that the complications of prematurity got left behind in the NICU when a preemie is walked out the door. But it is simply too early in his development to declare him free of any "effects of prematurity." This isn't me being an overanxious mom. It is a fact of preemie development, specifically micropreemie development. That said, it is encouraging that Henry's concentration is excellent (an observation made by Cuyler at his last OT evaluation a couple months ago). He is an activie and "spirited" child, but he doesn't display some of the nervous fidgeting that is common in ADHD children. And although his concentration and focus are high, he can be redirected toward other activities, easing a whole other set of concerns about autism spectrum disorders (25% of very low birth weight children end up being diagnosed with these disorders early in life). In short, Henry looks fabulous. We're happy.
When Henry saw us through the window, he began to tear up. I came through the door. He ran to me and gave me a big hug. Then, he wanted "Daddy." Miss Diana said that Henry is doing well. It is always an adjustment, especially for those kids who have never been in daycare before. He "ate some" of his lunch and snacks. She said that when she arrived, he was getting up from nap. He cried a little when he got up. He pointed at the wall at the dog and said something and then "champ." She asked if we had a dog named "Champ." Jeff figured out that Henry was probably saying "Lady and the Tramp." The dog looks like a brown version of the "Tramp."
We then picked up Miss R. Her class had just gone outside to play with the water table. They had just finished snack, but Miss Josie and Miss Kristen let Miss R bring her saltine with her. She is a slow but strong eater for them too. When she saw me, she handed me her partially eaten cracker and then gave me a big hug. She had a good day. Yesterday, she observed but didn't play much. Today, she played. She particularly like playing with the dolls and kitchen set.
We looked at the fish tank on our way to the car. Miss R can say "fish," we learned yesterday. Henry was anxious for his bottle when we got to the car. When we got home, we let the kids watch some of The Jungle Book to help Henry in particular unwind. We've decided to change our routine so that no television is watched right before bed. I read some abstracts that suggested that television viewing before bed increases the chances of troubled sleeping (in adults as well as children).
Alison, our family specialist from A Place To Call Home, arrived about a half-hour after we got home. And then, Carmen, Miss R's CPS case worker, arrived. She had a copy of Miss R's medical records. The law says that Miss R's case is supposed to be decided within 6 months of removal from the home. CPS may try to extend that a year b/c there are older siblings and it would be more convenient for them to be on the same schedule. Of course, the law was created b/c attachment is particularly crucial to young children, and dragging out cases for lengthy periods of time isn't advantageous to the infant/toddler development. It simply isn't. I don't quite understand why they'd try to put the kids on the same schedule when the siblings involved will almost "age out" of the situation by the time a year is up. At least one will be 18. The other will be close. Given some extending sibling circumstances, they'd probably be monitored by the system after 18, but 18 marks a whole different set of legal rights for them. Alison said that she'd be surprised if the courts went against the 6 month law given that progress hasn't been made by the bio family who have opted not to use some CPS services offered to them. If a family is making progress, then the courts tend to be more lenient. It's complicated.
It turns out that the permanency hearing for Miss R won't take place until September but there is a progress hearing in August. It is likely that one of the siblings who will be 18 in a couple months will be allowed to live with a friend/relative (it is unclear whether the person is really a relative) who lives near the parents. At this time, Carmen didn't think that CPS had the discretion from the court to place Miss R with that person as well, meaning that the court wants Miss R to remain here for the time being.
Carmen observed how happy Miss R is. Again, I think that she is surprised at how well and quickly Miss R adjusted to our household. She said that she is a different child when she is at parental visits at the CPS office. She also observed how well Henry and Miss R interact with each other. She wanted to see the bedroom. So we showed her around. Henry and Miss R played with each other behind the curtains in the bedroom as they like to do. Before Carmen arrived, Miss R gave Henry a big hug in front of Alison. She also petted Henry's head several times. That was new.
After Carmen and Alison left, I went through the medical records. I did find something of concern that appears to not have been followed up on, as recommended in the records. Unless of course the records are incomplete. I'm suspect that it is something that has been ignored. I'm going to call Dr. Bianchi's office in the morning, let them know that we have the medical records, and see if he wants to see her and simply order a test that I think should be conducted.I took Roger for a walk while Jeff cooked dinner and fed the kids. Then, we gave the kids a bath. We read "Donald Duck and the Magic Stick" twice. I braided Miss R's hair. It isn't as good as last time because I was trying to do it quickly. But it isn't bad. And then, the kids went to bed.
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